Confessions of a Secret Keeper

Just the confessions of a girl who keeps everything to herself.

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1. Chapter 1.

        ~Dear Diary~ 

   Well first of all my names Tristan and people who know me (well think they know me) would say I'm shy, quiet, an average good girl, but every good girl has a secret whether she tells it or not. I have many secrets. Secrets that would make people stop thinking of me as a good girl because I'm not one. I have two friends they know some of my secrets but not all of them and I doubt they ever will. They'd think of me differently and their probably to caught up in their own problems to care. Well ok so confession one. I get high a lot. Nobody would ever imagine the good girl gets high but I do. Well I inhale stuff I'm not a smoker, I like smells. Perfumes, gasoline, air freshener, stuff like that. Its who I am. I mean nobody knows my family are mostly drug addicts either but they are. I remember being eight years old and watching my sister and her friends get high, maybe thats another reason why I'm so messed up......I don't know. Nobody not even my family know I get high. I'm not someone who gets high to get high either, I get high because it takes away my depression for a while, and for a short time while I'm high I feel like I have a reason to live but.....I don't. I hate my life I hate everything about myself. A day doesn't go by that I don't think about ending it. But I haven't ended it...well not yet, but you never know...I might. The thoughts don't go away. I'll explain a little about my life now. Well I only have a mother my dad passed away when I was eight, now I'm thirteen. My sister Dawn started dating a guy named Tyler when I was little, he was a drug addict his entire family was. He got my sister started on drugs. She was seventeen when she had her son Drew, two years later her daughter Kristen, a few years later she had triplets Maria, Macy, and Julia. They died at birth. A few year later she had a son named Brian. Then she cheated on Tyler with his brother Troy. They had two kids. All her kids were born early. All because of drugs. Then they got taken away. Drew, Kristen, and Brian went to their dad. The other two came to live with me and my mom. Slowly she stopped paying attention to me so basically I can do whatever I want. I miss the times when she cared I really do. Theres more, I have a brother to he's 26. He's been to prison to many times to count. Why, because of drugs. I'm closest to him he's always there for me he doesn't do drugs anymore. His names John. I also have another sister May. May's in college she is a good girl not much to tell. Then another brother Ben. Ben's the oldest 29 he graduated college. Not much more to tell except he had a son who lives in California, Dakota. We see him about once a year. Well no more brothers or sisters. But thats all for now no more really to tell about my family or my first confession so we're done for now.

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