New Findings (Book 1)

Rosalin , a normal teenage girl from Flordia, applies to the music school of her dreams in the UK. Will she be accepted to the school of her dreams... Is it all what it seems? Who will she meet? What will happen to her that changes everything.Read to find out!

Directioner.One Direction Fan Fiction <3


44. Freedom!

     Rosalin P.O.V

     The hospital released Eleanor the next morning, giving her medication for a steady pregnancy. Making her loopy and tired 100% of the time. We wall climbed on the bus and helped her settle down. She stayed in Louis's bunk all the time, understandable. Louis is watching me again and it gets annoying, I know he cares but I'm almost 17, I can take care of myself. I quit watching the news all together, it is all about Holly trying to get Niall away from our family. I still can't trust him, even though I want to for Ella's sake. Zayn and Perrie got engaged and Liam and Danielle broke up. Liam is now dating some new girl, I don't like her, but can't say a word, Liam is my rock. Niall is trying hard to get my trust back, but sometimes I feel contained in the jar, I have no room to breath. We headed back on tour this morning when we got back from the hospital. I said bye to my parents and left. I hate saying goodbye. All I can do is sit here and think, nothing else to do.

     Niall came and sat beside me on the couch and kissed my cheek, "Hey Love." I smiled. "Hi, How are you?" He nodded. "Good, You doing okay?" I nodded and he left taking Ella with him. We always have these small talk convocations, it is always so awkward, so pointless. Liam is always in the same room when we have these small talks. He came and sat by me. "Everything okay?" I nodded, "Yeah, I guess so." Liam shook his head. "I don't think so. What is going on?" I shrugged. "It feels like Niall and I lost that spark when he cheated on me with Holly. I want to believe I love him but I don't think I do anymore. I feel empty, like I'm only in this for Ella. I know Niall and I will not last like this forever." Liam nodded. "I can see you gave up." I nodded slightly. "Yeah, I try but only for Ella and I can't trust him anymore." Liam wrapped an arm around my weak body. "You better cut things off now, when Ella is only little and won't remember her family being torn apart now, then later when she will hate you for it." I nodded, This was true. Niall will always be Ella's dad but he can't be in my life anymore. "I keep asking myself. 'Have I always felt this way, or was I really in love. Was I only with Niall because I want Ella to have her parents together.' I don't remember feeling 'In Love'  Maybe I forced myself to love Niall because of Ella." I looked at Liam who seemed so into what I was saying and taking in every word. "Maybe it was all for Ella and never for me. I feel like I'm stuck with Niall, I love him, but not as strong as 'Love'  should be." Liam nodded, as if he understood. Liam took his fingers and traced the scars and current cuts healing on my wrist "You need to talk to him as soon as possible. You have to tell him how you feel Roslain, or you will always feel this way. I care for you to much to see you starve yourself to death from being unhappy." I nodded smiling. He cares. He finished playing wit my wrist and grabbed my hand "What do you feel right now Rosalin?" He looked down at me and smiled. "I feel happiness. I feel like I'm myself with you. I feel complete." He smiled, and leaned down to my face, I leaned up, our lips were about to touch, when the door flew open, it was Paul. "Boys! Come in here." Liam jerked back and fell to the floor. I covered my mouth trying not to laugh. Paul gave us a look, he knows what was about to happen. Niall rushed in wit Ella. "Why is Liam on the ground!" He laughed. Liam got on his knees. "I tripped on this rug." I nodded as Niall sat by me and kissed my cheek. I didn't react, causing Niall to look at me weird. I just sat there emotionless. The other boys came in and sat around.

     Paul came in and shut the door and talked to he boys about the show tonight. "Okay guys. We are here in Nashville. Huge music fans here tonight. Perform to the best of your ability. Having some critics here too. Be good! Rehearsals start in an hour." They all nodded, Paul left. Niall let Ella run around a bit. Liam kept staring at me, as did Niall. I wanted to cry. I got up and zoomed to he back of the bus, Niall following. "Rosalin, what is wrong?" I sighed. "Niall we need to talk." We sat down in a couple of bunks. "I don't feel that spark with us anymore. I don't know if I ever really loved you. Maybe I wanted Ella to have her father. I need to think of myself now. Us isn't working anymore. I'm sick, this isn't working. I am stressed. I can't trust you." I finished talking and was on he verge of tears. Niall nodded wiping the tears away from his cheeks. "I understand. I will be there for Ella and for you. I understand that you don't love me anymore. I'm sorry." I shook my head, "It isn't your fault." He nodded. I kissed his cheek, got up and left. Louis was holding Ella and staring at me. "What happen back there?" I smiled. "Freedom." Louis smiled and so did Liam. "Freedom is the key for me, getting better."

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