Intoxicated Love

Bethany has had her fair share of bad relationships in the past to the point where all she wants to do is party and have her one night stands that she doesn't even remember. But when she moves to England after she graduates, and meets Harry Styles, will that all change?

*Includes mentions of self harm, sex scenes, alcohol, drugs, and cursing.*


10. Thoughts



He loved me. He fucking LOVED me. I fell against the wall behind me and buried my face into my hands, wanting to disappear. Why did it have to take him to see me with another guy for him to be convinced he loved me? No…this is stupid. He doesn’t love me. He was jealous because I got with someone else instead of him and he though telling me he loved me was his way of getting me to drop Aaron. Well, it wasn’t going to work. I actually liked Aaron. He was alright in bed, and he was a gentleman to me for the most part. I knew Aaron would grow on me so I had nothing to worry about. They boys always said I should find someone else…so I did.

I pulled myself off the floor and walked into the living room to see Bradie passed out on the couch. I smiled to myself weakly, wondering when she had gotten home. I wandered back to my room and started to finish up packing before I left in a few days.



“Who’s that?” I head Liam ask as I slammed the front door shut. I couldn’t even make it to my bedroom before I started crying. I slumped against the door and buried my face in my hands. I had to choose that moment to tell her I loved her. Why? I know her well enough to know she probably thinks I said it because I was jealous. I mean, I was but…oh who am I kidding? I knew this would happen. She isn’t afraid of anything, but when it comes to love…she’s scared shitless.

“Harry?” I looked up slightly and saw Louis standing in front of me. “What’s wrong Haz?” I buried my face back in my hands.

“I told her I loved her…” I whispered. Louis was silent. He knew he didn’t have to ask what happened because of my reaction but…there was nothing he could do. I felt his strong arms wrap around me and pull me to him. I rested my head to his chest and sobbed quietly into him.



On Thursday, I was in the airport waiting for my flight to be called. I was going to be in Italy for a little over a week and I honestly needed it. Ever since Harry confessed to loving me, I haven’t been able to function properly. I wasn’t afraid of anything; if he asked me to jump into a pool of angry sharks, I would do it…but asking me to love someone…that’s too much. It’s too much to handle.



It’s Thursday. That means Bethany is waiting for her plane to Italy right now. Thinking about it made me want to cry more, but I was out of tears. I wanted nothing more than to hold her in my arms but I couldn’t do that. She wouldn’t even talk to me. I have texted her, called her…she won’t talk to me. She won’t even return my calls. It kills me knowing that I’m the reason she’s avoiding me. If I had kept my mouth shut, she would still be here right now.

“NIALL, ARE YOU HERE?!” I heard Bradie yell through the house. I walked into the entry way where Bradie was kicking off her shoes.

“He’s out with the rest of the lads.” I said slowly. She looked up at me and smiled.

“Well it’s good to see you then.” Bradie came over and gave me a tight hug. “Why aren’t you with them?”

“I didn’t feel like going out.” I said with a shrug.

“Ooof…you reek. When was the last time you bathed?” I smiled slightly for the first time in days.

“The last time I saw Bethany.” I said slowly. Bradie’s smile dropped, making it known to me that
Bethany had told her about the encounter.

“That was a few days ago…please go shower or something.”

“I’m not feeling up to it right now. I could just rub it all over you.” I pointed out.

“Oh please…don’t touch me.” Bradie said, taking a step away. I smiled and then realized how close to Bethany I was, yet so far. I had her roommate, and best friend in my house, but she wasn’t here. “Hey, Bethany will come around…she has to.” Bradie said reassuringly. I shrugged and wandered back to the living room where I was half sleeping. Bradie followed me and sat on the chair next to the couch I was on and turned the TV on and watched TV. I was half sleeping and half thinking about Bethany while we waited for the lads to get back.                     

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