Scars (ONE SHOT)

When her cousin Niall Horan and his four friends turn up for valentines day, to say she's pissed is an understatement. Memories of her past controls her, can she face her fears and let down her walls.




Edited by my lovely friend newyorkandtypewriters :) Thank you xxx

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1. Chapter 1

 

One day to Valentines, my most hated holiday. And it was not because no one had ever been my valentine, people had. Valentines was a horrible time of year, when being single was rubbed in your face and your heart is torn out of your chest and stomped on. I'm pretty sure everyone in the world has had a bad valentine day in their lives, but to have 6 in a row like I have the past 6 years? That must be a record, or something. I sat by the flower shop window, the sun high in the sky and love in the air, it made me sick just thinking about it. I stood up and turned to leave when suddenly I had coffee all down my clothes. A scream of rage boiled inside of my but I just smiled at the poor man that had spilt his coffee on me and walked away before I would do anything I would regret. I could feel the coffee sink into my bra and seep in to my brand new jumper. It wasn't even Valentines Day and my luck had run out. I wasn't paying attention to where I was going until my key was in my apartment door. I opened my door and suddenly wished that I hadn't come back here, there was a reason I had left. My stupid cousin and his four friends, FOUR!!!! One was certainly enough, they were staying with me for a few day until their next plane, which had been delayed for the past few days because of the stupid ash storm of Chile. Why did they have to stay here, why not a hotel! But my cousin as I said earlier was stupid and wanted to spend time with me. Now I am not alone on Valentines Day, like I wanted, I won't be able to eat heaps of chocolate ice cream in my PJs and watch horror films all day, I'll have to be a host for the 5 most famous boys in the world. But to me they were just a pain in my butt, little kids that eat all my food and destroy my house. "Ellie!" a voice cried "We've run out of food!!" Niall Horan, my cousin. "There some frozen dinner in the freezer, help yourself" I said placing my bag on the floor next to the door. "We've already eaten those, sorry" Liam said, he was the less annoying of all the boys, he was polite and nice, not very noisy, doesn't cause much trouble like the others. "I'll get some pizza if you find the other boys, I want to set some rules." As soon as I said pizza it was as if everyone suddenly appeared out of thin air. "Did you say pizza?" Niall asked
"Yes, pizza, Niall, It's not like you haven't had pizza before" I picked up the telephone and dialling the local pizza place. "Hi, can I have, six large meat lovers" I ordered
"Is that all, Miss?" The pizza man asked. "Yes, when should I come and pick them up?"
"Ten minutes" The pizza man said and I hung up the phone. I counted them all, to make sure that they were all here before I started making my rules. "Here are the rules, no one is allowed in my room, my chocolate ice cream is to be untouched, If there is a mess I want it cleaned up. No running and no throwing things, is that clear?" They all nodded. I couldn't believe I was the youngest out of them all and I was the one being the reasonable one. The next five minutes past awkwardly, we all sat on the couches not daring to talk or move. It was nice, I could almost imagine I was alone, if it wasn't for Louis' constant fidgeting. "Do you have a playstation 3?" Niall asked and I looked up from my book. "Yeah, why?"
"Can we play on it?" Niall asked
"Yeah sure" I turn back to my book, I soon regretted saying yes. The boys blasted the volume and shouted at the top of their lungs while playing Fifa 13. I put my book aside and looked at the time, it had been 8 minutes but it didn't matter if I was a little early. I changed my top and bra before leaving and was at the elevator before one of the boys caught up to me. "Your going to need help carrying all those pizzas" Harry said smiling at me, but I wasn't in a good mood, why did he have to come? "Thanks" My face completely blank not showing the anger that was inside. "So…Its Valentines tomorrow, have any plans?" Harry asked, I just looked at him. "I mean like…um…are you and your boyfriend…going out or something…" Harry stuttered nervously
"No plans"
"Oh ok cool, no i didn't mean cool at all, being alone on valentines isn't cool, kind of sad, but your not sad or anything, I'm just going to shut up now" Harry rambled
"That might be a good idea" The elevator doors opened, we stepped into the lobby and my door man waved goodbye to me. I stood on the street, the cold New York air biting at my tips of my fingers and nose. We walked the two blocks in silence and when we got to the pizza place we stood quiet. When our number was called we took half of the boxes each and headed out. It wasn't until we were on our way home again when Harry dared to speak. "I'm sorry that all the food's gone and we're really noisy, I don't know why Niall asked if we could stay, we could of easily gotten a hotel." Harry said
"I don't mind" That's a big lie. "Of course you do any sane person would care." Harry said
"I'm his family" I refused to look at Harry. "Do you ever get angry?" Harry asked
"Yes, I get angry all the time, I just don't show it" I have know idea why i told him that, stupid, stupid, stupid! "So your angry now but your not showing it" Harry guessed
"No"
"Yes"
"No" I say forcefully. "See you are angry!" He said
"No, I'm annoyed" I corrected him
"Sure"
"Shut up"
"Did you just say shut up? Wow your even more badass than I thought" He joked
"You're so annoying" My cheeks heating up from the "badass" comment. We finally reached my apartment block. We got in the elevator and it was a silent ride up to the 20th floor. I unlocked my apartment door to find Niall setting a box of beers next to another box of beer on my coffee table. "Niall!" I'm angry, I hate alcohol in my house, I hated alcohol even though I had never tried it. "Awww come on Ellie, It's only a little bit and you don't have to have any" Niall moaned, I take a deep breath and realise that he is right, I don't have to have any, none at all unless I wanted some and I didn't. Harry and I placed the pizza next to the beer, I grabbed a plate from the kitchen and piled a few pieces of pizza onto it and retreated to my room, I'd rather not have been around when they started getting drunk. I was in my room for half an hour before they disturbed me. Harry and Niall came stumbling in, Niall already half drunk. "You can't sit in here all night" Niall said his words slurring. "Yes I can" I said, putting my book down. "Well we're not going to let you" Niall said and he and Harry came around the side of the bed and picked me up. They we're half carrying me, half dragging me. They plopped me down on the couch, Louis and Zayn we're sitting on the floor, Liam was in the arm chair, all of them a nice distance from me. Harry and Niall sat down with Zayn and Louis and continued to play the game they had left to go get me. It was some sort of card game that I had no idea how to play. Another half an hour went by with out incident and I started to relax. "So why don't you drink?" Harry asked, he wasn't as drunk as i first thought, his words only slurred a bit. "I don't like the side effect of being drunk"
"What the hangover?" Harry asked
"No the out of control bit, not thinking, not knowing what your doing, the anger" I shivered, memories poured into my head, horrible memories I didn't want to remember. "It's not all like that, it can also be fun, no angry just silly, happy feeling" Harry explained
"But it's the unknowing, will it be anger or happy? I don't want to take that chance"
"Are you scared?" Harry asked, forgetting about the game he was playing. "No" Another lie…
"Sure you are, scared of the not knowing but don't you want to find out, If you don't take chances in life, is it really living?" Harry asked and it was like all of a suddenly it was like he was some life guru. He was making sense though, I did want to try it and I was scared, he might actually be right about the alcohol. Wait what was I doing? Was I actually thinking about having a drink! Yes I was and for the first time ever it didn't seem like the end of the world if I did. "Okay, I'll try it but if I don't like it then no more bugging me about it okay?" I think Niall had a heart attack when the words came out of my mouth. "WHAT!!" He cried, in complete shock. "I've been trying for ages, everyone knows not to bother cuz she wouldn't budge" Niall said
"I think she needed some one that hasn't lied to her to tell her that" Harry said smiling over at me and I think about it, all the time we've talked and it hasn't been that much I've lied about every sentence where as he had never lied as much as I could tell. To be honest I think that he was someone that was honest most of the time and I could trust that. "So lets get her a beer!" Niall said and he and Harry left the game they were playing. Niall got three beers from the box, handing one to Harry and one to me, keeping the last for himself. Harry and Niall popped the cap easily and I tried to copy them but it wouldn't budge. "Here" Harry said grabbing my bottle and popping it open for me. I took the bottle back from him and lifted it to my lips. It was bitter at first but it had a nice taste, I didn't feel any side effects but after a few more mouthfuls a happy bubbling feeling settled in my stomach. "It's not that bad…" And Niall jumped with joy. "I can't believe that happened, I can't believe it!" Niall said and I started to blush, it wasn't that big of a deal, maybe that was a lie as well I couldn't tell. As the night grew on and I had more beer everything seemed to blur a little and I could't stop smiling. A silly feeling surrounded me and all my worries vanished, I didn't care if they broke something, it was actually funny, I wasn't scared of alcohol anymore or being around drunk people, I couldn't care less. Some how I found myself sitting on the floor in the hallway with Harry the other boys know where to be seen. "Why are you scared of the anger?" Harry asked his words slurring. I thought about it for a moment, the idea of lying to Harry again made me feel horrible but could I tell him the truth? I looked up into his eyes, even though we were both sitting he was still taller than me. "You have amazing eyes" I mumbled, smiling sillily up at him. Harry laughed "You didn't answer my question" He said. I scrunch my eyes up and refuse to open them. "Its my dad" I blurted out before I could stop myself. I opened an eye to see Harry's reaction to the news but he didn't look sympathetic or anything so I carried on, still keeping my eyes closed as if that could stop the horrible memories tumbling into my mind. "He used to drink a lot and he would get angry when he drunk" I could see my dad towering over my younger self, as my mother tried to stop him. "He used to blame me for his life, said I ruined it" I felt Harry shift next to me, I opened my eyes to see Harry grabbing my hand and urging me on. "On valentines day six years ago he came home drunk, I was thirteen…" I trailed off unable to finished the sentence. "It's okay" Harry mumbled reassuringly and I closed my eyes again. This side of Harry I hadn't seen before, soft, encouraging, reassuring. And I believed him, It was okay. "-I was in the lounge and my mother was in the kitchen" I swallowed the lump in my throat and carried on. "He-e came for me-me…" I chocked
"Shhhh…it's okay" Harry whispered
"He had a bottle…" I lifted Harry's hand to my shoulder and pulled back my t-shirt, right over my heart was a scar. I heard Harry take a sharp intake of air, his fingers raked over the scar sending shivers down my spine. "What happened next?" Harry asked
"My mother came in…she tried to stop him but he pushed her away" A tear leaked out of my eye. The memories where to much, I felt like I was living it, I could see the anger on my dad's face and my mother falling and hitting her head on the corner of the table. "Oh god" I couldn't breath, it was too much. "Hey, hey I'm right here, shhhhh…It's okay" Harry muttered brushing the tear from my cheek. "She fell and hit her head, he blamed me, It's my fault…if she hadn't tried to stop him she would still be here" I sobbed and Harry pulled me to his chest. I could see the flashing light from the police cars from that night. "The neighbours had called the police, they had heard the screams and shouts, they dragged him away" My word muffled my Harry's chest. "He was depressed, they said" I mumbled trying to pull away from Harry but he held me tight. "He wasn't, he loved my mother and I killed her" My tears wet soaking Harry's t-shirt, he didn't seem to mind. "No you didn't, you didn't kill your mother, your drunk father did, he pushed her away but he obviously didn't mean it, he was drunk, he didn't know that she would hit the table, you shouldn't blame yourself, your mother want to help to save you she knew what could happen" Harry said, pushing me away a bit so he could see my face. "Don't cry" He mumbled wiping away the tears. I took in Harry's face, his sparkling green eyes, he pink lips and his curly floppy hair, maybe it was the alcohol but he was very attractive, I couldn't believe I hadn't noticed before hand. I reached up and ran a hand through his curls, his eyes closed at my touch and I laughed, I'd never been this close to a boy before. "What's so funny?" He asked opening his eyes before. "You stayed, even after I told you everything, most people leave" I felt my heart clench, I didn't want Harry to leave, I didn't care if it was the alcohol talking or what but I needed him to stay. I leaned in closed, his lips captivating me. What would be it like to kiss them? Harry smiled, flashing his dimples that I hadn't noticed before. They were millimetres apart, their noses touching, breath mingling together; smelling strongly of alcohol. "I've never kissed anyone" I whispered, expecting Harry to retreat and call me weird like people before him. "That's really hot" He chuckled, closing the distance between us. At first he was gentle and slow but after awhile he picked up the speed. His hand held my face and my hands thread through his hair. His touch was intoxicating, soft strokes of his thumb, brushing my checks. His lips were nothing I've ever tasted before. A small whimper escaped from the back of my throat making Harry chuckled against my lips. I tightened my grip on his hair, pulling him closer, this time he was the one moaning in pleasure. I wanted to try something, something I wouldn't have the guts to do if I wasn't for the alcohol. I bit down softly on Harry's bottom lip and he groaned, so I did it again this time hard. "You're so hot right now" Harry mumbled pulling me closer. "IT'S VALENTINES DAY!!!" Niall shouted from the lounge, the hallway door burst open and Niall came tumbling through. "It's not new years you guys" Niall said when he saw us kissing. I pulled back, making as much space in-between me and Harry as possible. I couldn't believe I just did that, stupid fucking alcohol! I stumbled to my feet and head to the bathroom. Harry was still in shock from Niall's entrance to chase after me. I locked the door and fell to the floor. Stupid fucking alcohol. That was the last thought that flashed into my mind before passing out cold on the bathroom floor. //


A year later...

 

I could barely breath, the cold winters air freezing my lungs with every intake of air. Rain poured down around me, I could hardly believe I was here. My phone buzzed in my hand and I looked down at the screen, it was a text message from Niall. 'I heard you were in London, we should catch up some time before you leave' The text read and I smiled down at my phone. It's exactly what I was planning on doing. I reply 'Definitely, hows life? what are you up to now?' before entering the warmth of the apartment building. The reply was almost instant 'Life's good, just hanging out with the boys at my apartment' It was the reply I was hoping for. I stepped into the elevator and pressed a floor button. I was soon stepping out on to the tenth floor. I wandered down the corridor to I found the room 214. I placed my phone in my bag and knocked on the door nervously. A few moments later the door opened and Niall stood gaping at me. "What?" He stuttered shocked
"Surprise!" I pulled Niall into a hug and he seemed to come to his senses. "It's so good to see you!" He said pulling her into his apartment. "Hey guys look who's here" Niall said as four guys came into view. There sitting on Niall's couch was Louis, Zayn, Liam and Harry. I meet Harry's eyes briefly before greeting the other boys. I felt Harry's eyes on me the whole time, my heart racing uncontrollably. "Harry, It's good to see you again" I said finally turning to Harry, he stood up and pulled me into a hug. The rest of the night was uneventful, mostly we just did a lot of catching up. I got up to go get a drink, I could feel Harry's eyes follow me until I was out of the room. I stood in the kitchen unsure of where everything was. Dirty dishes were stacked high on the bench, I wonder if there is any clean glasses. I hear the door open behind me and I turn to see Harry. "You ran away from me" He said
"I know" The truth at last. "Why?" He asked
"Because of the alcohol, I thought it was the alcohol" I whispered, not sure if he heard me. "And now?"
"And now, I know it wasn't" I could see the smile light up in his face. "I had to make sure it wasn't the alcohol" I said and he nodded. "I'm glad your here" He said taking a step closer. "I couldn't stop thinking about you" My heart fluttered at his words. He said nothing else as he closed the space between us, leaving only centimetres between our bodies. "You were gone the next morning" I mumbled
"We had to leave"
"I didn't get to say goodbye" I could feel my heart breaking again, I had trusted him with my secrets and then the next morning he was gone with out any warning or goodbye, I thought he had run like the others. "I'm sorry, you must of thought I was running" He said taking my hand in his. "Only a little bit" I joked. "Promise me you won't run"
"I promise"
"I promise I'll kiss every scar that's been planted on your heart and love your for who you are" Harry said tilting my head up so our eyes meet. "Will you please be my Valentine?" //

 

 

 

 

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