Broken smile


13. Confessions

I sensed it was day before I even opened my eyes. The chirping birds feasting on fruits high in the treetops was a give-away, not to mention the sunlight was bright enough to vaguely shine through my eyelids. I kept my eyes firmly shut as I began to imagine what mum was making for breakfast today. Pancakes maybe? I sniffed the air, looking for a hint, but instead of finding the smell of freshly baked bread and other delicious cooking smells, I found the air was fresher, with a tint of ocean breeze-

My eyes flickered open, and with a painful jolt I realised this wasn’t home. I rubbed my head; everyday things got more stressful, and every day I was forced to grow up faster; but really, inside I was still an adolescent, and what I really wanted was to have a normal life, with minimal responsibilities, and a family to care for me. 

I realised my head was in Louis lap, and his hand tangled in my hair. No wonder I was hallucinating everything was back to normal. I cherished the fact that I was being cared for once more; I knew I swore to myself not to use Louis, but I couldn’t help laying there for a few more moments. 

I closed my eyes once more, and began to drift back to sleep when I was pulled back to reality by a strange whirring. It sounded indistinctly like a massive nest of hornets, but I could somehow tell that was not the case. I got up and ran to the cave entrance, looking for something guilty of making that noise. My eyes drifted upwards and locked with a helicopter. Wait, HELICOPTER!

I ran over to Louis and shook him awake.

“argh, Rose!” he mumbled before rolling over. I growled, then tried again.
“What!” he snapped, before cocking his head to one side and mouthing helicopter? I nodded, as the noise of the approaching helicopter would have drowned out my voice. Louis jumped up, grabbed hold of my hand, and sprinted down to the beach, before jumping up and down to try to catch the helicopters attention. All my hope faded when the helicopter didn’t begin to descend. It was unlikely they would come here again. I sank to my knees. Now I would be stuck here for the next 50 years with Louis; if of course we survived that long. 

I began to sob. Not only had I ruined my future; which would have been dull, so I didn’t mind so much; but I had also ruined Louis future. And damaging someone else’s life was the last thing I would ever want to do. I knew what it felt like to have your life twisted and thrown back at you, and even though I thought I could never do that to someone, I did. I did exactly what those men did to me, but to Louis. If I had just died that night along with my family, Louis would have no reason to be here now. 

“Rose! Rose are you alright?” Louis knelt down beside me, but I jerked away before he could try anything. no more sympathy for me. Because lets face the facts; everywhere I went trouble followed me. when people begin to feel sorry for me, they too end up wrapped up in some crazed dilemma.

“Louis, go away! Stop feeling sorry for me! don’t you understand! I am no better then the people who murdered my family”

“What! No! you are 1000 times better than them! For one, you couldn’t tear someone apart like they did.”

“No I am not Louis. I have torn apart a person. I tore apart you. your life would have been great; you’re famous, popular, but I destroyed that by coming into your life, by-”

“No, you fixed me! by coming into my life-” he cut me off.

“How could I have possibly fixed you? do you call getting stuck here fixing you?” his comment left me muddled and confused, which calmed me down slightly as I tried to figure it out.

“Just hear me out ok! Getting stuck here was a mistake. I could’ve taken anyone here, and the same thing could have happened. It’s not your fault. Secondly,” he paused to take a deep breath. “you fixed me by teaching me what it is to love someone. Getting to know you, that showed me that love isn’t to sleep with some random girl then dump her the next day- its where you care about someone enough that you would die for them. I thought I knew what that meant until now…”

I was speechless for a moment; did Louis just confess his undying love for me, or was he talking about the way I act; the way I talked about my family, and how much they meant to me. How much I realised I loved them- but only because they were gone. you do only realise how important something is to you, after its gone.

I needed Louis to know he couldn’t have me; we wouldn’t work together now, or ever. He was famous and talented, while I was a nobody, who refused to run off the back of his fame. “Louis-”

“I want you to feel the same way. you did, once. Don’t deny it, I saw those hidden smiles, and watched you while you slept. You talk in your sleep. That’s beside the point though. The truth is, I love you rose, and I want you to be mine.” with that he wrapped his hands around my waist and kissed me.

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