At the airport


2. A few months later

Remember that feeling. Leaving. At the airport. I remember how miserable I was. I remember how incredibly sad the world look. Well, now it's different. The first or maybe even the third time when I was leaving I was feeling like this. But now I don't. I still feel sad, but ... it's not like before. I don't burst in tears and the journey is not so painfully long. It's just one of those things I have to do. Like homework of eating vegetables. I wish I didn't have to, but I do. So I just get on with it. This is how I feel now about leaving. And this made me realise that it's not the leaving itself I was so sad about. It was the fact that I am no longer at home. I am no longer at the place I know, I have to go to the other place where everything is completely different. A place I am not used to. Now I know this place "like the back of my hand" as many people would say. I was just afraid of the change, not the leaving. Maybe it was not even the place, it was the people. At home I have my mom, I have my dad, but I don't have them at the other place. At home I have the people who "get me". The people I can talk freely with. I can say whatever I want and even if I am a bit offensive (which I am sometimes) they know it's a joke, they take it with a smile. And I know that after it we will still be able to talk. At the other place I was constantly afraid that when I accidentally said something offensive. I was afraid that they wont be my friends anymore, that I will be left alone. Now I know that wont happen. They didn't leave me before, so they wouldn't leave me now.And best of all - they also joke-offend me. And it doesn't matter that they have some bad qualities, we all do, all that matters is that I can be me. This is all I ever wanted. What people from the movies have. This magical friendship that makes the whole world magical. I never believed it could happen, but now I know it's absolutely possible. Who knew that cheese friendships happen in real life?

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