At the airport


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1. At the airport

Leaving. That's what is happening. I am taking my suitcase my backpack filled with many things I dont really need. Probably I would never open it during my journey, but I still put everything inside. We travel with the car, past home, past the shop on the corner, past my friends home and then we keep on driving. Funny, while I lived here, we would usually drive this way to the cinema. It would be a happy evening. And now we are traveling to the airport, and it would be a sad event. I have been doing this many times before, but still it feels the same way everytime. Just by seeing the sign saying "Airport" my eyes fill with tears. I try to hold them back. I think of chokolate, I think of Disney movies, the way they always end with a happily ever after, I think of my favourite jokes. And it works, the tears do go back to their original place. My parents sit in the front and none of us says a word. That is not really strange, cause we dont always talk when we are traveling. I dont know why are we like this. Sometimes we talk and say jokes and stories and other times everyone just minds their own bussiness. Especially now, with all the smartphones and entertaining apps. And now its just one of these times when noone says a word.

And finally, we reach the airport. We park, my father takes out my suitcase and we start walking to the check - in. I wait on the long queue and then I hand in my passport. They check me and hand me back my passport with my boarding card. And then we go to the next queue. Waiting for someone to check my boarding card and let me in. And when that happens, I go on the escalator and he takes me up for security check.

Thats the moment I have been trying to avoid. The moment when I cant go back. I cant have a kiss or a hug. The moment when I leave my parents alone and I cary on to the plane. I will not see them for more than a month. I wont be able to have the funny talks late at night with my dad. I am full of energy. I am hiper and wannna talk and talk and all he wants to do is go to bed. But he stays awake cause I want to talk with him about candy or planes or whatever funny thought I have. I will not watch a movie on the coach with my mum. I would watch with entertainment, laugh, cry, smile and so on, and she would just pretend to watch, but she would actually sleep, cause thats the only time of day when noone wants her to do any job. It sounds like all my parents do is sleep, but these are just the parts which stay in my mind. The funny parts, when I can joke with them and tell them they are becoming old. And we laugh. That is what I remember. And I wish we had more of them but we dont. I wish I had more time, but all my time is now over. I am leaving now. I have to go. I can still see them, far away, waving at me from downstairs and I wave too. Trying not to cry, just smiling, making funny faces, so our last few moments together are happy, not filled with sadness.

Its time for security check and I have to forget my pain and concentrate. None of the people around care that I wanna burts in tears. They dont care. And I must keep myself from crying. I get on the plane and travel.

I finally arrive. Alone in my room. And then I climb on the bed and burst. Nothing else matters.

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