Loved.

(This movella is set as if One Direction isn't famous.)
Ashalee York was always one to try and hide away, she only showed who she really was to her one friend Jay. Ashalee is shy, and a good girl (who sometimes likes to bend the rules) and she is insecure about herself. Ashalee is your average girl in every way on the outside. But on the inside she deals with the constant struggle, the rage on inside of her mind, she's bipolar. It may be fate, chance, destiny, or whatever you call it but she finds herself mixed up with Harry Styles who wants to show her that she doesn't have to close people out. But he doesn't know about the mental war the wages deep within her mind and maybe if he did know he would leave her and label her as a freak like the rest of society.

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15. Unpredictable

Ashalee's POV

My heart felt like it was lodged in my throat. As I woke up in a haze the alarm clock read, 6:56 PM. I didn't hear my parents they weren't here yet I'm guessing. They were late. I was sweating, or maybe that was dried tears on my face, maybe it was both. Sleep still in my eyes. I was so angry, so sad. I didn't know which was which. I was angry Harry saw me break down. Now he must have some clue to what I am. What am I? A freak, a bipolar freak, stuck on this swing set that I can never get off of. I've hit rock bottom. That lumpy feeling, like my heart was beating in my throat came back as I saw images of Mile's body on the stretcher. Was she dead? She looked so fine on the outside. But I guess I did too, but that was until you found out about me, really found out. I turned to look, Jay was gone but Harry wasn't. He sat there on the floor, back against the wall. His head tucked neatly between his knees and he huddled them close to his chest, his chest rising and falling curls in his face.

As I tried to move out of the bed quietly the bed creaked and Harry lazily sat his head up, eyes immediately swinging wide when he saw me awake. He scampered to his feet.

"Slept well?" He cleared his throat, his sleepy voice nearly made me pounce on him. Maybe if I was a little more awake I would have.

I nodded my head no. He approached me, but then stopped.

"I can't go without saying, Jay told me."

Why was I getting afraid? Why was I getting angry? Why was a sort of happy, relieved? I'll tell you why, that's because I'm off. Or wait, is this how a normal person would feel? Possibly? I guess so, but my brain magnifies it making it unbearable to hold inside so I just burst.

"Did she tell you I' crazy huh? What else did she say? Did she say I used to have no friends besides her? Did she read you my diary? What else did she say!?"

I pushed him, hand brushing against his hard torso, he moved back a bit, because he was still asleep.

"Shhhh. Calm down love."

He called me love, his British accent making me want to forgive him. Wait, he didn't do anything wrong, Jay told him. She was supposed to be on my side.

I ran into my closet closing the door, Harry stood there eyes intent on me. I used to paint. Paint my emotions on a blank canvases, then when I was done the canvases would show all my crazy. Colors, mostly red and black splashed everywhere and me standing in the middle of the colors. Sometimes embracing them, sometimes yelling at them, sometimes laughing at them. The paintings were just sitting there in my closet. I covered myself with them.

Harry came to the closet.

"Piss off." I whispered, But I didn't want him too.

He slid the closet door open and sat next to me, he had to move some clothes out of the way so he wouldn't have pants in his face. He cradled me.

"Why didn't you just tell me? This isn't the worst thing in the world." His voice sounded so sure.

"I'm unpredictable, so complicated. All I've ever did was have people be afraid of me or make fun of me trying to make me pull out my crazy." I covered my face, I was getting sick of that word: crazy.

"I like unpredictable. I like you and there are tons more worse things than being bipolar." he tried to convince me.

"You say it like it's the common cold. It can't go away."

"Well I'm willing to work with it."

We interlocked fingers it wasn't anything romantic but somewhat sweet.

"Harry you have no idea what you are getting yourself into."

I wanted to warn him giving a chance for him to back off, I knew he wouldn't. We've only known each other for a short time and he was willing to give whatever we were a try.

"Half the time I don't."

He guided me from the closet spreading my paintings off of me. He placed me back into my bed, "Rest."

He said.

"Can you get me a glass of water?" I asked.

"Sure love."

I waited for him to come back, I heard dishes being moved around. Harry, I hope you realize what you're getting yourself into, really, I can only warn someone so many times.

 

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