February 14, 2013

*fanfic and diary. 1D not famous*
Jenna has been receiving creepy love letters from a secret admirer, and is determined to figure out who is sending them. Will it be who she thinks, or who she would least expect?

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22. Feb 12 2013

Today didn't go as planned.

I was supposed to tell Niall about just being friends (like I was yesterday) but I chickened out once again. How am I supposed to tell that to him? He's the sweetest guy ever and I know I have to turn him down.

I think I'm mostly just worried about loosing him as a friend. I'm afraid that he'll take it harshly and avoid me, pretending we never even met. And that is 100% not what I want to happen.

I didn't see Niall much around school except for lunch, so I figured that would be my time to tell him. We sat next to each other but talked mostly to the group. Every now and then Niall moved closer to me, smiling, not helping the situation any more.

I really did try to tell him a few times, but someone always interrupted or I just couldn't find the right words and told him to forget it. This is way too complicated.

After school Louis asked to hang out, but I already had plans with Marilyn so I promised him tomorrow.

"Ready to go?" Marilyn asked, smiling. I nodded as we got into her car and drove to the mall. We walked around and window shopped before actually going into any stores, like we always do.

"So... You and Liam." I said to make conversation. She still didn't know about the feelings we have, now more like had, for each other. I was just curious if they were.. Official.

"We've been talking a lot, actually."

"Do you like him?"

"I don't know, I mean he's sweet and all but... I don't know. Enough about Liam. Tell me about you and Zayn." She said, nudging me. "What are you talking about?" I gave a confused look. Me and Zayn don't have anything like that? "Oh please. Don't act like you don't know it." She replied."Know what?" I still didn't know what she was referring to. Marilyn just smiled and kept walking around to stores, not saying another word about the subject. What could she possibly mean? Sure, Zayn's a good friend, but we don't have the type of relationship like her and Liam do. Zayn wouldn't even think to like me that way.

We stopped in Forever 21 and DEB, finally picking out our dresses. Marilyn stuck with a simple pink vintage dress, I got a sleeveless red dress with little lace. We got a few little accessories and window shopped some more before leaving at around 5:30.

When I got home, I didn't bother checking my phone or getting on the computer. I just finished my homework and went straight to bed. Despite it only being 8, I was tired and ready to get the day done with. Ever since Marilyn mentioned me and Zayn, I haven't gotten it out of my head. What could possibly give her that idea? Zayn doesn't like me. I don't like him. But more I think about him, the less true that statement is.

I just want this week to be over with already.

Love,

Jenna

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