Too Late

Casey has a dark secret
a secret know one can know
but is it a secret to terrible to keep
or will it just prove to be too much .....


8. Reflection



I wake up and untangle my body from Harrys, his right leg is wrapped around my waist and I had my head still nestled into his chest. I try to move as quietly as I can without waking Harry, he stirs a bit but then goes back to sleep, I peck him on the lips and the go have a shower.

As the hot water rushes over my body I discover how absolutely crazy I feel, was I going Insane?! My dead best friend was visiting me every night in my dreams and I felt completely responsible for her death. I cried a bit in the shower but then again when do I not cry these days, god I am a emotional train wreak. When I got out of my 15 minute long shower I dried off and put on some jeans and a big cardigan, I went into the kitchen to make breakfast, french toast. I was just plating up when Harry walked out of our bedroom, his hair was extra curly and was sticking up in weird places which was extremely hot and he was only wearing his boxers.

"Morning" he said huskily, oh his morning voice was the best , "mmm french toast, I love you so much Case" he looked eagerly at the breakfast then walked over to me and crashed his lips to mine, I kissed back, huh his mouth tasted like toothpaste. I pulled away and smiled, 

"You brushed your teeth"? I laugh and he looks at me with puppy dog eyes


We kiss again and the go sit down and eat, I must say that the french toast is pretty yummy, I get lost in a conversation with Harry about there next tour dates and upcoming plans for the band, we talk about maybe going away for a bit, we both think that skiing sounds fun. For a while I actually don't think about May but then her menacing laugh creeps back into my mind and I can almost hear her shouting at me HEY CASEY!! HEEELLLOO?? EARTH TO CASEY! HEY YOU STUPID BITCH STOP BEING HAPPY AND THINKING ABOUT OTHER THINGS!! YOU MURDERED ME AND YOU NEED TO FEEL LIKE SHIT! YOU ARE A PEICE OF SHIT! A MURDERER!!! I suddenly choke on a piece of toast, Harry looks worried, 

"you okay babes"? I swallow and nod

"just didn't chew properly" I croak, I get up and go into the kitchen to get a glass of water, my hands shake as I pour it from the jug in the fridge. I stand buy the sink and drink it in small sips. Then something weird happens, I put my glass down and  look at myself in the reflection in the sink. I look and my face, my long blond hair, pretty blue eyes and little nose might look perfect to Harry but to me I see a worthless, lying, awful, hateful, gilt ridden bitch that killed her best friend and something inside my stirred and that something said to me in a faint whisper "your nothing Casey, nothing can you live with yourself?" and right then and there something snapped inside me and I wanted to rip apart that bitch that was staring back a me, I really didn't want to live with myself... 

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