Not Sure About Life... or Anything at all to be Honest.

I'm not sure why I made this, but I need to get my feelings out in some way. Probably no one will end up reading this, but I'm writing this for me, so I don't really mind. I know this seems unoriginal, and close along the lines of what Jenna does in Awkward. Looks like I'm unoriginal... oh well. I have no idea what I'll be writing about, so read it if you want.


1. Here goes Nothing

Here Goes Nothing

Chapter 1

     First off, I would like to introduce myself. I would like to keep this anonymous, but I can still give you the basic gist of who I am. I'm a sophomore in high school. I always had pretty good grades, and I'm in all advanced classes. My grades this past semester have gotten pretty bad though. I was in dance and gymnastics for almost all of my life, and now I'm in track. I used to be really into acting; now that I think about it, I have no idea why I'm no longer interested in it.

     I used to be a really good kid until last year. I got drunk on the new years of my freshman year with my friend, Callie. Between the two of us, we had about 6 ounces of vodka. When midnight rolled around, we couldn't stop laughing and everything was a hilarious and happy blur. I obviously wasn't terribly drunk, considering I remember it; I was considerably tipsy though.

     I've never been entirely drunk before, but I must admit, I am a light weight. One beer gets me tipsy, so I try to avoid alcohol. Besides, I don't care for it that much. I prefer to be myself, I usually end up having a better time, and remembering it more. The only time I ever drink is if it's a celebratory cheer, or it is a needed ingredient in a delicious drink. Rum Chatta is happens to be a delicious drink.... I would love if there was a non alcoholic version of it. I would constantly drink it.

     I have also tried weed. I haven't done it in 3 months, and don't plan on doing it until the summer. My friend Callie, my other friend Anna, and I are smart about smoking and we made up rules so that in never gets out of hand.

The Weed Smoking Rules

1. Never smoke alone- Its sad and pathetic, the only use for weed is to enhance the party.

2.No smoking more than once a week- only potheads do it that often.

3.Never skip something to go and smoke- Weed is the last thing on your list of priorities. You may only do it if you have absolutely nothing going on. 

4.Never be high at school- don't fuck up your education.

5.Don't pressure people into doing it- respect other people's opinions. If they don't want to do it, don't be a dick.

     So, as you can see we are not potheads and are responsible about it when we do it. I've only done it about 15 maybe 20 times. Anna and I are on the same page about doing it. We don't want to do it again until the Summer, because we have nothing going on then. plus there are concerts and its way easier to enjoy. And it's always nice to have it out of your system... cause you never know if you'll be drug tested. Callie on the other hand, likes it alot and does it way more than Anna and I. She's nowhere near a pothead, but still, I don't really see the point of doing it unless you're at a concert or party.

     I feel like I've made my point in saying that I enjoy the occasional joint, but I am nowhere near a pothead. Funny thing is though when people at my school found out that I tried weed, they nearly had a heart attack. During spring break, my old friend Lauren and I made plans to split a joint with these two other guys. Some people found out, and since we seemed so innocent, the entire freshman class started calling us potheads. All because of 1/4 of a joint... but no worries, they forgot about it a week later. And by Sophomore year more than half of our class has at least tried it. It's really no big deal.

     As you can see, the people at my grade are extremely gullible and lack common knowledge. They spread and believe the oddest things. I was once asked if I did crack, because someone heard it somewhere... I didn't even know what crack was. At the beginning of freshmen year all of my old friends said they hated me and wanted nothing to do with me because I'm a whore.

     I am one of the prudest people in my grade! I didn't even make out with someone until a month ago, and he was my boyfriend. We also did nothing more than make out. So, basically summer before freshman year, I was talking to this guy for a few months and he asked for a picture of me. What I did next, I completely regret. I sent him a picture of me in a sports bra and shorts... I didn't think it was a big deal, because I had pictures of me and my friends in bikinis on facebook. Then at the end of the summer a different guy and I started talking again, just as friends, but we had went out before so people thought it was more than a 'just friends' relationship. Well it turns out, my "friend" liked the guys I was talking to, and got jealous because they liked me. So, without talking to me first, she told all of my old friends that I sent tons of nudes to many different guys.I was shunned from my old friends, and it was bullshit and hypocritical. It's funny, because they actually started sending actual nudes in 8th grade, but I didn't judge. I'm really glad I'm done with them though, I can now see that they're annoying, fake bitches.

So, yeah I'm not quite sure on how to end this really unorganized, short chapter.

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