Dark Side

Lux Gallagher is a contestant on The X Factor USA.
She thinks everything is going great for her, until the producers drop some news.

Everyone is getting their own celebrity mentor for the live shows.

Lux is excited, until she finds out her mentor is an obnoxious, pompous jerk.
Not only does he think he's God's Gift to women, he's in a boy band to top it off.
Will their constant arguing and fueding ruin her chances on the show?
Will their dark sides tear each other apart and destroy one another?

Find out who wins this war in Dark Side.

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51. Could

 

 

Lux cried for what felt like hours, her face buried in Harry’s chest, in her pillows, in her arms. She would stop for a few minutes and then start all over again, a repeat of her world crashing down around her on replay in her head.

He wanted to soothe her so badly, but felt as if there was nothing he could do. He was the reason she was going home, if only he had stayed away from her like he was supposed to. If only he didn’t sit down next to her in the hall that day and whisper to her, “I still want to see you.” If only things had gone differently.

“Okay.” She let out a long breath, wiping her cheeks clear of tears. Her face was red and puffy, and he held back a smile every time he looked at it. Damn, she was adorable when she was sad.

“You good, love?” He asked, reaching his hand out to her, rubbing her arm softly.

“I think so.” She tried to smile, but it was a bit wobbly, so Harry reached out for her.

She crawled into his arms, pressing herself to him fully, looking up at his face.

“Kiss me.” He said quietly, his voice husky. He rubbed her cheek with his fingers, pulling her down close to his face and then waiting, watching her. She moved down the rest of the way, closing her mouth against his, feeling his fingers slide back into her hair as she did so. He tangled his hands into her strands of hair, tugging her in tighter.

Harry pulled back and looked at her, squeezing her cheeks. “I love this face.”

She smiled and pulled out of his grip, moving away from him. “I don’t know why.”

“You just look so…” He paused, tilting his head. “perfect, but in a broken way.”

“That doesn’t make any sense.” She chuckled, shaking her head. “But I’ll take it.”

“You look beautiful, Lux. You know I’ve always liked you like this, with all your cracks and messed up pieces showing. Vulnerable, that’s it. You look so vulnerable right now, and I..” His voice cracked, causing him to shut his mouth and turn his head away from her.

“Harry?” She murmured, touching his arm softly.

“I…” He swallowed harshly, “I can’t let you come home with me, Lux.”

She felt her entire body tense up, her limbs going numb and her insides go cold. She didn’t even know what to say next, what do you say to that? How do you possibly reply to something like that? She shook her head, turning to look over at him. He stared back, a scared child.

“You… you don’t want me there anymore?” She whispered slowly, fumbling over her tongue, barely able to get the words out.

“I want you there more than you can imagine. I want to wake up to your face every day, and bring you tea in bed when you’re ill, and introduce you to… m-my mum and sister…” His voice broke again and he turned away from her, blinking wildly at the thought that Lux would never meet his family. He wouldn’t cry. He couldn’t.

“You threw a fit, Harry.” Lux whispered, her face showing shock. “You threw an absolute fit when I said I didn’t think moving across the country was a good idea for either of us. You were adamant on taking me home with you. What changed? What…did I do?”

He stood up quickly, turning to face her, his hands shaking. “You didn’t do anything.”

“Then why are you doing this when I need you the most?” She asked, and he watched tears spill out over her cheeks silently. He forced himself to hold his hands down at his sides.

“Because its the right thing to do, Luxie.” Harry watched her shake and bow her head, and then he got down onto his knees in front of her, grabbing her hands tightly. “I’m doing this for you, so I don’t hold you back, so you don’t just become known as my girlfriend, so you don’t get further in your career because of my name and my connections. Do you want that?”

She shook her head, pulling her hands back and wiping her cheeks. “No, but I want you.”

“I want you, too.” He said, pushing her hair back from her face. “More than anything.”

“You used to be so selfish, why aren’t you like that anymore?” Lux whispered, “You used to want me no matter what the costs, because I was what you wanted and needed. You didn’t care who got hurt or affected by it, you only cared that you were happy.”

“I care about your happiness more, Lux. I want you to go and do great things, even if that means I can’t be around to see it happen. I want you to become something, whatever it is you want to be, and if me being here is holding you back, then I’m going to leave. Don’t you see? Don’t you see how much you matter to me?” His voice was low and raspy, his eyes shiny with tears.

She looked down at him, looked at the way he stared up at her as if she were the world, as if she were everything he needed in the palm of his hands. She understood everything he was saying, her brain was screaming at her that he was right, that she should smile and nod.

But her heart, her heart was in agony. Lux could almost imagine in her head the exact way Harry reached into her chest with his fingers and ripped her heart out of her chest, still beating and bloody in his palm. His nightmares, they all came true in the end. He ripped her heart out of her chest. But the great thing about it was the look on his face, the concern and the tears, the love in his eyes, the sadness in his turned down lips. He didn’t mean to do it, he honestly didn’t, he was trying to do the right thing in this situation.

She pictured him staring down at her heart in his hand, the fear in his face, the way he may carry it around with him for a while, but she knows that one day he’ll come back. She knows one day he’ll return with her heart in his hand, put it back in its rightful place, and bandage her chest up until the bleeding and the pain stops.

“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, Luxie.” He was whispering, stray tears on his cheeks. She reached up and wiped them away, looking into his eyes, studying the beauty of his face, seeing how lucky she was despite all the pain she was in.

“You don’t ever have to apologize to me for anything.” She whispered, repeating what he said to her earlier that day. Lux pulled him to her and locked her lips onto his, tasting his salty tears on his mouth, licking them away and then kissing him some more.

“I love you.” he mumbled against her lips, “Now and forever, Lux. I’ll love you..”

“I love you, too.” She whispered, pulling back from the kiss and wiping her cheeks. “But I think I need to just…be alone for a little bit.” Her eyes looked faraway, a glaze over them that worried Harry. He stepped back and looked at her for a long time, before jamming his hands into his pockets and nodding slowly. She made no move to stop him as he headed for the door.

“Harry?” She whispered just as he reached the door, and he spun around.

Harry watched her from where he was standing, she turned her head slowly to look back at him, still sitting on the bed, her hands wrapped around the comforter in fists.

“Lux.” He replied, waiting for her to make eye contact. She did, and he watched a tear drop down her chin and fall lightly onto her pants. He watched another tear fall right in its’ place.

“I’ll miss you when I’m gone.” Lux was quiet, but her voice didn’t break although she was crying.

He tilted his head in confusion, taking a step forward, wanting badly to go hug her and rock her back and forth while she cried. He wanted to fix her, fix every broken part of her, especially the parts that he broke himself. But he saw her tense up when he stepped toward her, and seeing that made him feel like he just walked right into a brick wall. She already had a guard up.

So Harry moved backwards slowly, reaching for the doorknob and weakly turning it. It was a ten minute conversation, and it left him feeling like he just got back from a war.

“I’ll miss you more, Luxie.” He breathed out, his voice a cracked whisper that she barely heard.

“Come find me when you don’t want to be alone anymore.”

—————————————————————————————


At midnight, Harry’s bedroom door opened softly, and Lux slid into his bedroom without a sound. She could see the outline of his face in the moonlight that shone through the windows, and she walked to him, lifting the covers and sliding her body into his bed. She tried to stay in her own bed, to fall asleep without him, but it proved impossible. She doesn’t know how she’ll ever sleep again after he's gone.

His bare skin hit hers and she let out a soft sigh at the feeling of his warmth against her fingers. She wrapped her body around his, curling herself into him and hugging his waist, feeling the light trail of hair that leads from his belly button down into his boxer shorts. Her fingers slid over the dents in his hips that made a V shape, feeling his muscles and warm skin.

“How will anyone compare to you?” She whispered into the back of his neck, his curls tickling her nose and lips. She pressed a kiss to where his necklaces closed, shutting her eyes tightly.

“Lux…” He groaned, half asleep, turning his body into hers. His face came to lay directly in front of hers, so close that she could feel him breathing on her mouth. He didn’t say another word, simply waited for a moment before grazing her lips with his own. She parted her lips, feeling him breathe in when she breathed out, taking her oxygen and making it his own. He licked his lips slowly, his tongue rubbing against her lips when he did, and she curved into him further.

“You are so sexy.” He mumbled to her in his sleepy voice, deep and husky and everything that made her crumble into his arms. Her hands moved up from his hips, over his chest and neck to his hair, both hands grasping handfuls of his curls between her fingers. She felt him staring at her now, watching her breathe against his mouth for another second before she gave in and locked her lips onto his, sucking his lower lip into her mouth.

It was his turn to curve into her, his hands desperately dragging her closer to him, holding her hips to his tightly. He flipped her onto her back, laying heavy on top of her, grinding his hips down into hers, pressing his erection against her wet panties. Lux groaned and freed her hands from his hair, moving them down to his back, clawing her way down as his hips swerved into hers.

With a few quick tugs, they were both naked from the waist down and he was inside her, grunting against her mouth, his hands moving up to grasp the headboard of the bed. She pulled back from his kiss to watch the muscles in his chest and arms twitch and tighten, admiring how absolutely perfect he seemed to be. Harry made love to her quickly and roughly, her nails raking down his back the entire time and his teeth biting down onto her bottom lip as he tightened his grip on the headboard, his knuckles hitting the wall every time he thrust forward, turning them bloody. As he gave one last hard thrust, spilling inside of her, he brought his sore and bloody knuckles down to her face, holding it in both hands and kissing her lips sweetly. She lightly ran her hands over his back, watching him wince as she went over the scratches she just made.

“I don’t want you to be anybody else’s.” Harry groaned into her ear, staying inside her, cuddling his face into her neck and sighing into her hair. “I don’t want to share you.”

“You think I want to share you?” She whispered back, tears filling her eyes. “I want you at my side through everything, Hazza. I’m not ready to say goodbye to you.”

“Baby,” He sighed again, “I love you so much. I’m glad you didn’t want to be alone all night.”

He lifted his head to look down at her, watching her smile tightly up at him.

“Couldn’t sleep without you anyways.” She shrugged, feeling cold and bare as he pulled out of her, rolling to his own side of the bed. He looked over at her, reaching over to lightly touch her cheek as his eyes fell heavy.

“Yes, you could.” He murmured, “You just don’t want to.”

Lux laid there in silence and watched him fall back asleep, thinking over his last sentence to her, knowing how completely right he was, and knowing that he was referring to a lot more than just sleep. She thought for so long that she couldn’t do anything without him, but she can. She just never wanted to witness life after Harry, she didn’t want to know what it was like to not have him around all the time. The two things in life that scared her the most right now were leaving and having to say goodbye to Harry.

But tomorrow morning, she has to face her fears. Or try to.

 

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