You're My Light

When Zayn stumbles upon a girl who has many secrets and cuts herself he decides to take her in. She doesn't trust him at first and is quick to try to escape. But he keeps her firmly trying to protect from herself. As she realizes she can overcome the hurt, the two fall for each other. Then a horrible event occurs, but the boys don't see it as too tragic. Will her secrets all be revealed? Only Zayn can bring the light back to her darkness and vanquish the evils that haunt her.

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40. Why would I do that?

 I gasp - why the hell would I do that? My thoughts numb and my body wants me to drag the knife again. Instead I drop the knife and run out of the kitchen. I get to the living room and see Zayn. "Zayn!" I call him. He looks at me. "I made a mistake," I say my voice cracking. Without saying anything else he looks at my wrist and sees the red trailing down my arm.

"Damn it," He mutters.

"I don't know why I did it and I'm sorry. As soon as I realized what happened I dropped the knife I'm sorry I didn't mean too I'm sorry," I apologize profusely. He wraps his arms around me and I sob into his shoulder. 

"Shhh Charlotte it's okay," He soothes me. "Let's get you bandaged up, yeah?" He asks. He wraps an arm around my waist, supporting me, as he leads the way upstairs. 

"I don't even know where it came from," I ramble on. He sits me down on the edge of the bed gently and disappears for a moment. When he comes back he is carrying a first aid kit. He bandages the cut and then sits next to me, holding me in his arms. 

"The important thing is that you wish you hadn't and that you came to me," He says, an edge to his voice. He sways back and forth until I calm down and my breathing is even again.

"It was like my body was telling me it would help. And then all of the bad thoughts numbed and I didn't have to worry about them," I say after a while. 

"Charlotte listen to me. Cutting is not good. It is a temporary mental escape that causes an addiction and overall mental instability, not to mention the physical impairments," Zayn tells me.

"When did you learn that fancy lingo?" I ask, trying to change the subject.

"Charlotte," He warns.

"I know Zayn. I heard you," I reply, pushing away from him.

"Damn it," He says.

"What now?" I exclaim.

"We are back to square one basically," He responds.

"How dare you?" I question him. "When did I ever go to you, sorry that I cut myself? I didn't! When did I even go to you period? Square one my ass! More like all you want is a good story for your career, not caring if you break hearts along the way!" I exclaim standing up.

He takes a deep breath and tears spring to my eyes. "Charlotte I care about you more than anyone I ever had before. I just worry so much that I am ridiculousy over protective." He replies.

"Prove it," I whisper. He takes my hands in his.

"Let me take you on a date and I'll show you," He responds, pressing his forehead against mine - how am I supposed to say no to those beautiful brown orbs that look like milk chocolate? 

"Yes Zayn," I respond. He gives a small smile. All of my anger dissolves and I pull Zayn to me, holding on to him tightly as if letting go of him will make me lose reality.

"Habit is something you can do without thinking, which is why most of us have so many of them,"

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