You're My Light

When Zayn stumbles upon a girl who has many secrets and cuts herself he decides to take her in. She doesn't trust him at first and is quick to try to escape. But he keeps her firmly trying to protect from herself. As she realizes she can overcome the hurt, the two fall for each other. Then a horrible event occurs, but the boys don't see it as too tragic. Will her secrets all be revealed? Only Zayn can bring the light back to her darkness and vanquish the evils that haunt her.

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26. Not Knowing

Charlotte POV

                  I wake up and the first thing that I see is white. There are white sheets, white gown, and pale white walls. Then I look around and see three people. One of them is Belle, my best friend. But the other two people I don't recognize. I try to remember how I got here but the only memory that I have is of a while ago when Belle and I were playing in a field and talking about going to uni. 

                 "It's okay luv. You are going to be okay," The guy says. I turn to look at him and try to search for some recognition. Then I shift my gaze to Belle.

                 "Belle!" I exclaim. She wakes up and comes over to me. I move to a sitting position but the guy motions for me to stop. I ask who he is because I don't see why he should even be in here. Belle and the guy exchange a long look and then Belle turns back to me. 

                  "Sweetie this is your close friend Zayn. What do you remember?" She asks me. I shift to look at the two of them and then I wearily look over at the third girl sitting in the chair who is still sleeping. I tell Belle that all I remember is that we are best friends and the two of them look at each other again. 

                   The next thing I know the guy - Zayn is rushing out of the room while Belle smiles in a way that makes me feel like I've seen it before but I can't quite place it. After a minute a nurse comes back in and looks at the machines I am hooked up to and checks my eyesight. She tells me that in the morning I will be going in to take a cat-scan and I try to hide my anxiety. The nurse also tells Belle and...Zayn that they should try to help me "remember" but not "push" too hard. 

                    I look down, trying to shrink back and not be the center of attention when I see multiple "Fresh" scars on my right wrist. My left wrist is in a brace and I can feel a small pain in my side. My right ankle feels strangely heavy but I am mostly concentrated on brownish red cuts on my arm. "Wait. What are these?" I ask out loud, not really aiming the question at a particular person. I point to my arm to emphasize. "And don't you two look at each other again," I threaten.

                    Belle says that my personality is still in tact but Zayn says something about not the Charlotte he knew. "Are you going to answer my question?" I demand. Belle tries to tell me to calm down but I feel the blood rushing through my veins like electricity. "Well you imagine waking up in a hospital and not knowing how you got there or who you are!" I exclaim. I slam my fist down on the sheets beneath me but then I feel a sharp pain in my side and bend over.

                     "Are you okay?" Zayn is suddenly an inch away.

                     "Yeah...I'm fine - well physically anyways. Mentally I'm going bonkers," I answer looking around the room. "Now will one of you please answer me?" I question but it sounds like I'm not giving them an option. 

                     "I know this is difficult for you, but I need you to be patient," Belle tells me.

                     "You are right. It is difficult. But if you aren't going to answer that question do you mind filling me in on how I got here? Or who that other girl is?" I inquire.

                     "Charlotte luv," Zayn places his hand on my arm. I instantly pull away from his touch.

                     "What is it that you don't get? I DON'T know you!" I bark, moving to the opposite side of the small bed. 

                      "Get some sleep honey. We'll answer your questions in the morning," Belle says.

                      "I am not sleeping until I know how I got here," I state, crossing my arms over my chest and grimacing in the pain from my side. They both reach out to uncross my arms but I keep them firm over my chest.

                       "We were heading to the park. You were looking back at me when a car came out of nowhere and smashed into you while you crossed the street. We are lucky that you weren't hurt worse," Zayn explains. 

                        "Now will you please relax?" Belle questions.

                        I sigh and uncross my arms. "Fine," I grunt and lay back on the bed. I pull the blankets up to my chest and fall back asleep to the beeping of the machines.

 ***

                       "She doesn't remember any of us?" I hear a voice whisper.

                       "Just that Belle is her friend. She tore away from me twice," Another voice replied quietly. I let my eyes flutter open and my mouth falls open in a gape. I see five boys, one of them being Zayn from the night, and the girl who was sleeping. All of their eyes shift to me and stare at me.

                       "Can you not stare at me? I'm not wearing make-up!" I exclaim, moving to hide my face.

                       "It's okay don't hurt yourself. We've seen you many times without make-up," The guy with curly hair says.

                       "That doesn't seem like something I would do," I mutter. 

                       "It's time for your cat-scan sweetie," A nurse comes in saying.

                        "Where is Belle?" I question.

                        "She went to get coffee. You are okay with us," The one with the quif says.

                        "In case you haven't noticed, I don't remember you. So no, I'm not okay with you," I snap. He shrinks back in his seat.

                         Belle comes back in with two cups of coffee and gives one to Zayn who is just sitting there silently. "It takes her a while to get used to new people," Belle apologizes for me. "Charlotte, these are your friends. Niall, Harry, Liam, Louis, Eleanor, and you met Zayn last night," She introduces us.

                        The one with the quif was Niall and the one with the curly hair was Harry. The other two had brown hair too and were a little hard to tell apart. "Are you ready dear?" The nurse asks.

                        "Sure," I answer clenching my fists at my side. I look up and Zayn's eyes bore into mine before looking down at my hands. I force them to relax and look up at the nurse. Many other people come in and begin to wheel me out of the room. When we get to the room with the giant machine the nurse helps me climb out of bed and lay down again.

                         "How is your rib?" The nurse questions.

                          "It feels better," I lie convincingly and give a small smile. I quickly lay down and close my eyes in an attempt to calm myself. Soon enough the whole thing is over and I'm being sent back to the room. "Am I allowed to eat?" I ask.

                         "Yes," The nurse responds.

                          "Belle can you -" I began.

                          "I'm on it," She replies heading out of the room. The nurse follows her out after saying something about me going home.

                          I turn back to the people in front of me and the girl smiles at me. It gives me a strange feeling inside that makes me look away. I find myself staring out the window just so that I don't have to make eye contact with any of them. "Are you hurting?" One of the boys says.

                        "Not really. I'm just a little sore. Thank you for asking," I turn back and smile. The one who had spoken was Harry - the one with curly hair I think.

                        "No problem," He smiles. 

                         Liam...or Louis, turns on the tele in the room and turns up the volume. It's on the new station and it's a report about how a band named One Direction had post-poned an upcoming concert. "What's so popular about this so called One Direction?" I question. Two girls on the screen scream they have One Direction Infection. "Oh! Direction Infection! Well all of this news is definitely making me sick," I taunt. Suddenly a picture of the five boys sitting in front of me appear on the screen with the title One Direction on them in a poster format.

                        I look down at them and make the connection that they are One Direction. I immediately feel bad for what I just said and I face-palm. "Oh my god I am so sorry," I apologize. "It's just that I never really liked famous people and assume them all to be snotty and rude," I explain.

                        "It's okay luv," Louis/Liam replies.

                        "I'm sorry but which one of you is Liam?" I ask. They all start laughing. The one who just told me it was okay was Liam and the one who turned on the tele was Louis.

                        "I guess we have a lot to prove to you like we did when we first met you," Niall, the blond haired one says. Zayn elbows Niall.

                        "What do you mean by when you first met me?" I question them.

                        "You weren't the biggest fan of us when we first met, that's all," Zayn answers quickly. He sends them all a glance that says Be Careful and I feel like I've seen it before.

                         "What is your problem?" I accuse Zayn.

                         "He's just looking out for you," The girl, Eleanor replies.

                          "Having a stranger look out for you doesn't exactly help. I know you guys are supposed to be my friends and all, but as of right now you are just strangers!" I exclaim, looking pointedly at Eleanor and Zayn. Zayn pushes himself up from his seat and takes three quick strides out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

                        "We'll go check on him," The remaining four boys announce. They  exit the room, leaving me alone with Eleanor.

                        "Do you remember anything about your family?" Eleanor asks delicately. Her voice sounds warm and safe, like one of those people who you can never resist telling things too. I shake my head. "You have another friend named E-"She starts.

                        "Emily," Belles voice finishes the thought. "Her name is Emily. And she's not your friend, she's your sister," 

                         Belle places a tray filled with hashed browns, eggs, and bacon in front of me. "I have a sister? Then why isn't she here? And where are my parents?" I inquire.

                        "You really had to bring up the family discussion now?" Belle asks Eleanor.

                        "I'm sorry. I should've known better. I just figured maybe it would spark some memory," Eleanor responds. I close my eyes and try to imagine what a sister of mine would look like. 

                         "You know what? I don't even want to know right now. When do I get to leave?" I inquire knowing the two of them are growing uncomfortable with the topic.

                         The doctor comes in as if on cue and looks at a bunch of charts. "Charlotte is suffering from temporary memory loss. Her memory will come back eventually, however the span it takes could range anywhere from a couple of hours to a few years," The doctor delivers the news. "Some of her memory may come back in pieces and she may not remember everything at once," 

                        "And until then?" I inquire because the news is about me and yet he was talking to Belle and Eleanor.

                        "Your friends will try help you get your memory back, but not pushing you too much. Pictures, descriptions, and other sentimental things should help but aren't guaranteed." The doctor answers me.

                        "And when can I leave?" I press.

                        "You are allowed to be discharged at two o'clock this afternoon. I'm prescribing you pain medication for your side and recommending no straining activities for the next two weeks. Your rib was only bruised so it should be good as new by the end of next week. As for your leg and arm it will probably take two to three weeks depending on how well you take care of it." He answers my next two questions as well.

                         "Do I have clothes to change into?" I ask Charlotte.

                         "Well the past two weeks or so we've gotten new clothes for you. I can go run and get your supplies for you," Eleanor suggests. I nod a thanks and she takes off. As she leaves the room Zayn enters back in again and takes a seat on one of the chairs.

                          "It has come to my attention that she self-harms," The doctor turns her attention to Zayn and Belle and speaks in a lower voice.

                          "I do?" I question.

"Mostly, we don't remember most days. We remember the moments,"

 

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