You're My Light

When Zayn stumbles upon a girl who has many secrets and cuts herself he decides to take her in. She doesn't trust him at first and is quick to try to escape. But he keeps her firmly trying to protect from herself. As she realizes she can overcome the hurt, the two fall for each other. Then a horrible event occurs, but the boys don't see it as too tragic. Will her secrets all be revealed? Only Zayn can bring the light back to her darkness and vanquish the evils that haunt her.


5. Not Giving Up

Zayn POV

           When Charlotte tried to escape out of the back door I thought I had her. But she kicked me where it hurts and then rummaged through the drawers until she found something sharp. Promptly upon finding a knife she cut her wrist many times. I tried to make my way towards her slowly to get her to stop, but the more progress I made the more she hurt herself.

            Eleanor appeared and promptly told me to back off, just as Charlotte had. I didn't want to because I knew Charlotte wasn't stable. But then Charlotte cut again so I took a couple of steps back. Charlotte kept her eyes on me as Eleanor slowly advanced on her. Then Eleanor managed to get her to reach for the phone where she had to put the knife down. But Charlotte couldn't handle it so she threw the phone and I had to duck out of the way.

           Eleanor reached Charlotte and placed a comforting hand on Charlotte's shoulder. Then after Charlotte said something to Eleanor, Eleanor waved us out of the room. I stood right outside and waited for them to come out.

           I heard the sink running and assumed they were washing off the fresh cuts from Charlotte's arm. "I don't understand why he cares," I heard Charlotte say.

           "Is it really that hard to let someone in?" Eleanor replied.

           "It is when you have my life," Charlotte told Eleanor.

            "Will you tell me what happened?" from Eleanor.

            "I can't. I can't have this conversation," Charlotte said quietly.

            "Can you at least say why you're so bothered by Zayn touching you?"

            "He reminds me someone I used to know," Charlotte responded.

             "Well we have to face the facts. Zayn won't let you leave," Eleanor stated.

              "Why not?" Charlotte snapped.

             "Because honey, you're a danger to yourself," Eleanor said.

              "Whatever," Charlotte mumbled.

             "Why don't we work on being okay with Zayn," Eleanor suggested. I didn't hear anything from Charlotte. "Zayn." Eleanor called me as if she knew I was standing there the whole time. She probably did. I slowly walked in but stayed a good distance away from Charlotte.

              Charlotte braced herself against the counter as Eleanor placed another comforting hand on her shoulder. She relaxed a little. "Good job Charlotte. Ready to start?" Eleanor asked, already gesturing for me to move forward. Charlotte kept her eyes on Eleanor.

              Eleanor reached out to grab my hand and gently replaced it with hers on Charlotte's shoulder. Charlotte flinched at my touch but her gaze remained locked on Eleanor. "Now Charlotte. Zayn is going to pick you up, and carry you out to the living room. If you feel unsafe calmly tell us you need to get down instead of screaming okay?" Eleanor asked Charlotte gently.

              Eleanor nodded so I picked up Charlotte in a baby cradle. Charlotte's gaze moved to me and our eyes locked. "You're safe Charlotte," I whispered as I began to walk out. Charlotte grabbed onto my arm as if she was struggling to stay alive.

              The boys didn't comment at all when we came into view. I made my way to the arm chair and gently put Charlotte down. She brought her knees up to her chest, like the first time I'd seen her. As I sat down on the couch next to her I noticed she was still looking at me. I smiled and looked over to her. Once again our gazes locked and I felt like there was something holding me there. Like there was something keeping me from looking away.

              "So does anyone want to watch a movie?" Louis said and the moment vanished. I looked back towards the boys who were staring at the muted T.V.. I said sure and we decided to watch Toy Story which was Liam's favourite.

               Charlotte's gaze met  mine continuously and we had moments I think. But every time something would snap us out of the trance we were in and we would go back to the movie. We watched these movies at least once every two weeks. I excused myself in the middle of the movie so that I could go take a shower.

              I walked up the stairs and into my bedroom where I grabbed my towel. Then once I got into the bathroom I hopped in the shower. The hot water felt really good on my back as I wondered what had caused Charlotte to come to this. She seemed like she was a really nice girl who was holding something back and couldn't bear to let it go. But if she let it go it could help her greatly.

              I climbed out of the shower about fifteen minutes later and got dressed in the bathroom. I fixed my damp hair after I towel dried it. But when I got out of the bathroom and made my way to my bedroom I noticed the door was ajar.

            Slowly I pushed the door open to see Charlotte sitting on the bed with the razor in her hand, ready to cut. She looked up at me and then down to the razor. "Charlotte look at me," I whispered. Again she slowly looked up at me. There were tears in her eyes. "You're strong okay?" I said holding my position.

            "No I'm not," She replied quietly.

            "Yes love you are. I'm going to help you through this okay?" I asked her. She was still making eye contact with me and I took a chance that by saying as long as we kept contact she wouldn't cut.

            "It's my only escape," She whispered.

            "What are you trying to escape from?" I questioned trying to keep my voice calm. I took a step towards her. Now she was only about four feet away from me.

           "The secrets," She answered, tears running down her cheeks. She looked down at the razor again.

           "Hey hey Charlotte," I said. "Look at me," I whispered. Her gaze met mine. I took another two steps towards her. Now I was in reaching distance of the razor. But instead of grabbing it I sat down next to her and wrapped my arms around her. "You're safe," I told her again.

            She shook her head. "Just hand me the razor love," I whispered holding my hand out.

           "I can't. I'm not strong enough," She said lowering it to her skin. I grabbed her hand that was holding the razor.

            "I'm not going to grab it from you. I want you to know that you're strong enough. Close your eyes, take a deep breath and just open your hand," I replied. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Good job. We're almost done. Now just open your hand," I insisted. She opened two of her fingers and the razor fell out. I took it in my hand and threw it across the room.

            I'd have to move it after but right now I had to focus on Charlotte. I made sure my arms were still around her and her head fell on my chest. I rested my chin on her head and just held her as she sobbed. "Why do you care about me so much?" She asked in a whisper after a while.

           "I don't like to see people hurt. Especially beautiful young women like yourself," I joked.

           "Do you have wine? Or beer?" She questioned.

           "Yes I believe I have some red wine downstairs. Why?" I asked.

           "Well I don't know. Maybe the alcohol could help instead of..." She trailed off.

            "But that could make you become an alcoholic," I told her.

            "You should just give up on me," She whined.

            "I'm never going to give up  on you Charlotte. We'll take it one day at a time, together," I said. She looked up at me. I smiled at her and her eyes averted me. "Why don't we go back downstairs," I suggested. She didn't say anything. "You know, I'm not like El. I don't know what your opinion is unless you tell me," 

            "We can go downstairs," She said quietly. I moved her so that she was in my arms like a baby cradle. When I stood up she grabbed my arm the same way she had before.

            "Do you want to sit with me downstairs?" I offered her. Once again she didn't say anything and I didn't want to push my luck so I took that as a no. When we got downstairs I placed her on the same chair as before. I moved back to my spot and got comfortable.

            I saw her looking in the direction of the kitchen. She got up and walked in that direction. I followed her and when I got in she was reaching for the knife. I ran to her and grabbed her arms in min. I pulled her towards me and she stopped trying to get away after a minute. "I told. I'm not going to give up on you," I told her.

            "We're in it together right?" She whispered.

            "Yes. Which means I won't give up on us,"

"I won't give up on us, even if the skies get rough,"

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