You're My Light

When Zayn stumbles upon a girl who has many secrets and cuts herself he decides to take her in. She doesn't trust him at first and is quick to try to escape. But he keeps her firmly trying to protect from herself. As she realizes she can overcome the hurt, the two fall for each other. Then a horrible event occurs, but the boys don't see it as too tragic. Will her secrets all be revealed? Only Zayn can bring the light back to her darkness and vanquish the evils that haunt her.


14. Meeting at the Concert

Charlotte POV

             Zayn was trying to get me to look away from the door. I really, really wanted to look away and see Zayn's face but I couldn't find the strength. When his talking efforts didn't do anything, he stepped up on the stairs and my view of the door was blocked by his head.

            I already had a horrible headache from the hangover and now this screwed with my head even more. Being drunk got rid of the pain for a little while but now I was back to my old self, plus a migraine. Zayn put one arm around me, and I numbly walked down the rest of the stairs with him.

           I couldn't handle being here much longer. The secrets were eating away at me just like they were at home and that's why I left. But I couldn't bear to tell the secrets either. "Morning love," Harry's voice brought me out of my trance. I flinched into Zayn because I wasn't expecting anyone to talk to me. 

           "Hi," I replied. I felt Zayn's eyes searching for mine but I couldn't look up right now.

           Harry offered me some breakfast and I accepted it politely. I sat at the kitchen island with Zayn as we ate. He purposely took the seat closer towards the hallway just in case. We ate and then went back out to the living room. All through out this time, I never once looked at Zayn's face or stopped thinking about everything.

           "Is everyone all set and all right with tonight's plan?" Eleanor asked, sitting  on the recliner in Louis' arms. I nodded knowing I had one of the easiest parts in an easy plan. We sat around with the girls and I watching the telie as the boys talked about the songs they wanted to sing tonight.

            After a while Liam announced it was time to go. Eleanor gave me a jacket to slip on, and approved of my off of the shoulder top with  the bangles. I was still moving in auto-pilot so I wasn't surprised when Zayn came to me and wrapped an arm around my waist to steer me out to the car. 

            I closed my eyes as we went outside to not risk trying to escape. "It's okay love. I've got you," Zayn whispered in my ear. I leaned into him for support and he just lifted me up. I gripped his shirt and arm tightly while he carried me and then put me in the vehicle. Even in the car, Zayn didn't let go of me. He pulled me closer to him and I rested my head on his chest.

            I listened as all of the other boys got in, still keeping my eyes closed. When everyone was in I hesitantly opened my eyes. Niall was next to me, and Liam and Danielle were in front. The others must've been in a different car.

            I moved so that I was leaning against Niall instead of Zayn. I didn't want to get so attached to Zayn because it would just make it so much harder on me when I left. When we reached the arena, I climbed out on my own. Zayn offered me his hand but I declined it. If I was closed off then it would hurt him now and not later. Plus he might give up on me so then I could leave.

            We entered the arena and the boys went ahead to practice on stage. Eleanor and Danielle linked their arms through mine as we headed to the office to get our all access passes that said we could go anywhere in the arena. Security took my picture and gave me my pass and then we all went to sit in the empty seats of the arena.

            "How's your hangover?" Eleanor asked me. I shrugged. Eleanor was going to be harder to shake off than Zayn. 

             Throughout the next four hours we did many things. Eleanor ran up to the concessions to get us snacks while Danielle and I watched the boys rehearse. Security came by and chatted with us. He winked at me when Danielle told him about me being with Zayn. I tried to press that we weren't together but the truth is, I wasn't sure if we were together.

             After a while the three of us went to a room backstage where there were couches and a screen displaying the stage. "Miss Charlotte?" A guy came in, wearing a suit.

             "Hello," I said unsurly.

             "Hello Paul," Eleanor said. Danielle waved. "Paul" smiled and looked at me.

             "Zayn would like to have a word with you. And since it is imparative that my clients are happy, I came to get you myself," Paul told me. I looked unsurely at Eleanor and Danielle. They nodded encouragingly so I got up and followed Paul out. 

             He lead me to a dressing room that had Zayn's name on the door. He knocked twice and then immediately let me in, closing the door behind me without coming in himself. "You wanted to chat?" I asked Zayn pointedly. He was looking in the mirror, fixing his hair.

             "Are you okay?" He questioned, turning towards me. I nodded not making eye contact. "Are we okay?" He pressed. I nodded, my eyes tracing a frame. "Are you sure? Because you aren't looking at me," He pointed out.

             "We done here? I do believe you have to get ready for the performance," I replied, pivoting on my heels. Zayn grabbed my arm and pulled me so that I was facing him. I closed my eyes so I wouldn't have to look.

             "I can be equally as closed off. I normally am with the boys. But with you I'm not. So I'm asking you not to be either. And I get that you have secrets. If you want someone to share them with, I'm here for you. But if you can't talk about it, I'll still be here," He told me, caressing my face.

             "Zayn, I..." I trailed off not knowing what to say. I opened my eyes and met his gaze. Lifting up on my tiptoes, I kissed his cheek and then pulled away. "Get ready for the show," I whispered as I left his dressing room.

            I took the long way back to the room. I seriously needed time to think so I figured a walk would help me clear some of it out. After about fifteen minutes the doors opened and people began filing in for the concert. Stopping at security, I checked to see if the tickets for Belle had been picked up yet. They hadn't so I took a sheet of paper and a pen. 

                               Trust Eleanor.

           That was all that I wrote. But in my handwriting, I was sure that Belle would at least follow the instructions. I put it with the two tickets for Belle and then slowly made my way back to the room. As soon as I was backstage someone from security came over to me and threw me over their shoulder. I began screaming and kicking until the guy put me down and a different set of arms were around me.

            "Charlotte thank god!" Zayn exclaimed. I pulled away from his embrace.

           "Would you like to explain to me what just happened?" I yelled outraged.

           "I couldn't let you escape so I sent out security when we realized you were missing," He said.

            "I didn't run away Zayn! I was taking the long way back here so I could clear my head! Ask the people at security if you don't believe me!" I replied and turned away. He grabbed my arm but I shook him off and went back to original room. "Just go sing already," I snapped when he called after me.

            I curled up in a ball in the room because no one else was in there. I didn't even understand why I was crying at this point; the tears were flowing down regardless. The opening act came out on the screen and it helped distract me. 

           When I stopped crying it was because the boys were making their dramatic entrance. I decided to go out in the arena to watch instead of sitting in here so I entered Zayn's dressing room where I noticed a make-up pouch earlier.

            After fixing my face I walked out to the arena. Security stopped me but I showed them my pass so they let me through. Getting to the front I absorbed the music. None of the boys saw me and they were singing Rock Me. They were moving up and down the stage, high-fiving fans so I reached my hand out.

           A couple of songs later, I realized how upset Zayn was. When the eyes weren't focused on him, he was messing up moves and frowning. When it was his turn to sing it didn't have the same effect as the others did. I caught Liam's eye during Little Things and he got Zayn's attention. Zayn began scanning the crowd and his gaze landed on me at the same moment that it was his turn for the solo.

           Occasionally Zayn would look somewhere else but his eyes always found mine again as the songs continued. During One Thing he was looking specifically at me and I felt so shy that I turned my head down. By the time I looked up again the song was ending and Zayn was walking to the front of the stage; right about where I was. I backed up in the crowd, signaling I didn't want to be singled out. What Makes You Beautiful started and when Zayn's eyes remained on me I turned and walked out. I definitely could not handle that because of the meaning of the lyrics.

           Heading back to the room I saw Eleanor and Danielle. "Hey how are you?" El asked me. I shrugged.

           "Kind of mad at all of you. But I understand why you guys were worried." I replied. She nodded and came closer to hug me but I was beginning to fall apart so i took a step back.

           "Okay well the concert is almost over so do you want to get settled in the room while Danielle and I go hunt down your friend?" She suggested.

           "I think I will run and get a soda first but then yes I will be there," I said. She looked me over and nodded, deciding to trust me. We all walked out together and split off as I went to get my beverage. 

            Danielle was going to distract Belle's plus one while Eleanor lead Belle to me so that we could talk. When I got my soda I went back to the room. After a while I heard footsteps from behind the door. "I'm just going to wait out here. I'll take you back when You're done," Eleanor's voice traveled through the door.

           The door opened and Belle walked in. I gripped the couch because she hadn't realized I was in here yet. The door closed as soon as she entered and she hesitantly stepped forward. When she saw me shock passed over her face. She ran to me and pulled me to her. "Charlotte! I thought I'd never see you again! Are you okay? Why did you leave? Do you know how worried your aunt is? And E-" She continued.

            "Do not say the E word," I growled. She shut up immediately. "I'm working things out and staying with...friends. And as far as my aunt is concerned you recieved a letter saying I was okay and this meeting never happened," I demanded.

            "I'm so glad your okay!" She exclaimed, her eyes tearing. "When are you coming home?" She questioned. I looked away and the room fell silent. "No, Charlotte listen to me. You have to come home," She pressed.

            "I'm figuring things out right now but as of today I can't handle going back there. The most I can promise is a phone call every once in a while...and even that is subjective," I replied.

             She took a deep breath and let it out in a sigh. "I won't tell your aunt and E- anyone that I saw you. But I want a mobile number and I need information," She said in her controlled voice. We both got angry easily and it felt familiar to hear her voice.

             I relayed my cell number to her. "So who are these friends that you are staying with?" She inquired. I shrugged. "I know there's at least one guy because he was the one I spoke with the other day right? And are you taking care of yourself? Since when do you wear bracelets?" She asked.

            "Right, yes, and none of your business," I answered.

            "Ommmiggod! Are you staying with One Direction?" She questioned. I began to deny it but she held her hand up. "Save it. I see your all access pass. And now that I'm thinking about it, why else would Louis Tomlinson's girlfriend be the one bringing me to you?" 

             "Please do not make it a mistake that you know this. Because I swear to god, I will cut off contact with you, and run away from the boys." I threatened. "You have to go now," I said, pushing her towards the door.

             "What?!" She argued.

             "You know I'm okay and you possibly know how to contact me. But if I get more than 3 messages or calls a day I'm switching the phone off and the only time I'll talk to you will be on a a blocked phone. But that's all I can handle right now so you Have to go. Now." I commanded and opened the door. Eleanor was standing across the hall talking with a security guard. I nodded at Eleanor and she walked over to us.

                Belle hugged me out of no where and whispered, "I love you,". I nodded and then Eleanor was pulling Belle away with the security guard trailing behind.

               "Not a word to anyone!" I called after her, before taking off towards where I expected Zayn to be.

"In life, we have secrets, things we regret, dreams we can't reach and a love that we will never forget,"

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