∞ Take back those words ∞

There’s no proper blurb for this, I didn’t think it needed one. The songs at the start of the chapter are songs that sort of go with the chapter and helped inspire it. This is definitely going to be one of my longer movellas, I’ve already written a lot and I know I’ll probably be writing a lot more. Another little note, if you hadn’t seen the tags, this is a Larry fanfic so if you’re anti-Larry then don’t hate on it, I’m not forcing you to read this or ship them.


1. Chapter One


Music: Skinny Love – Birdy


‘Lou, they’re worse than ever.’ Harry sobbed into my shoulder as he clung to me tightly.

‘We would’ve had to say it someday. The rumours were getting too much.’ I whispered with a grimace.

‘We should’ve never come out.’ He kept crying and I wished I could stop it.

It hurt somehow, like he was ashamed of what we had together.

‘It’s going to be okay, I promise.’ I said firmly. My eyes started to well up with tears.

I didn’t want to see Harry like this, so truly sad and I was unable to make him happy.

‘I hope so...’ He sniffed and loosened his grip on me.

‘It will.’ I gave him a small nod before pulling away from his grasp.

I slumped down on the chair behind me and put my head in my hands, unsure whether it would get better.

I found myself at the conclusion that it would die down but there would always be at least one person hating on either our relationship or our sexuality.

At least we would always have our families behind us. The girls had taken it strangely but were still supportive and Harry’s sister Gemma had said she would back us up no matter what.

I looked up and saw that Harry had left the room. I made no effort to go and find him; he had left the room for a reason.


I sat on the edge of the cold bathtub and held the small pocket knife out to my left wrist.

I took a deep breath before shakily putting the knife to my wrist and slowly cutting the skin.

I let out a sigh as the blood trickled down my wrist, the pain weirdly comforting to me.

I subconsciously let the knife fall to the floor, clanging as it met with the hard stone tiles.

A few minutes passed before I reached down and picked it up, only to cut my wrist again.

Breathing fast and heavy I continued to make cuts all up the inside of my forearm. I threw the knife down onto the floor and closed my eyes.

I sat for what must’ve been about half an hour, not caring when the blood fell on my designer jeans.

I got up and walked over to the sink where I washed the blood off my arms. I pulled down my sleeve ignoring the stinging when the fabric met the tender cuts.

I unlocked the bathroom door and walked out to the living room where Louis was sat in a chair.


From the moment Harry walked in I sensed something different about him. Although still sad he seemed calmer. I leant back in the chair and muttered a greeting which he returned.

I got up and walked to the kitchen.

‘Harry, do you want any toast?’ I shouted through to the living room to Harry.

‘Sure.’ I faintly heard him say.

I put the bread into the toaster and stood around humming a song to keep my mind from wandering to the hate.

When the toast popped out I transferred it to a plate and spread butter on them.

I walked through to the living room and saw Harry sitting in the chair I’d been sitting it before, his head in his hands, a posture like my own a few minutes ago.

I held out a plate for him and he took it from me, his sleeves slipping down his arm a little, revealing slices on his forearm.


I heard a crash as Louis’ plate of toast impacted with the floor, shattering the plate. I looked at Louis wide eyed and followed his gaze to my arm where my sleeve had fallen down, making my cuts visible.

I blinked back tears and bit my lip.

‘Why?’ Louis’ voice cracked as he spoke the single word that made the tears in my eyes tumble down my cheek.

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