She's Not Afraid

Sophia Villegas has everything she could ever want. Her life wasn't horrible, but it wasn't great.
Sophia tries to please everyone, even all the people she hates.

Zayn Malik has just gone through a nasty break up, and just wants to forget about it. What happens when he meets someone new at a party, and falls head over heels for her?

Can Zayn get through to Sophia's heart? Or is this love story hopeless?

You'll never know until she falls in love...

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16. It Feels So Right

Zayn POV

I finished up with the washroom and started back to the VIP. Once I got there I noticed everyone was really quite. I pushed through the crowd and saw Sophia sitting with Niall. Niall had his arm wrapped around her shoulders and she was looking deep into his eyes. 

Then they kissed. It felt like someone stabbed me in the stomach over and over again. 

She pulled away from Niall looking wide-eyed. "Niall, I told you we can't do this anymore." Anymore? She's been doing this before? I felt my jaw clench and my hands go into fists. 

"But Sophia, it feels so right. How can you not see that?" Sophia put her hands against Niall's chest and pushed him away. "No you don't understand that I only love Zayn." 

I was about to go up there and try to get an explanation when Liam stopped me. Sophia looked up and locked eyes with me. I felt my eyes fill with tears. 

"Zayn I can expla-" I shook my head. "No need to." I spoke, my voice cracking with every word. I turned around and stormed out of the club.

I sat down on a bench and put my head in my hands. Was I not good enough for Sophia? Is Niall a better boyfriend than I am? This is why she wasn't talking to me for days. 

I ran my fingers threw my short hair, suddenly taking out my anger on the wall beside me. I looked down at my bloody knuckles, my tears falling over the wounds.

"C'mon man. Lets get back to the hotel." I looked up to see Harry. Harry came over and wrapped his arms around my shoulders. "Everything's going to be alright." 

*****

It's around 3am and were all sitting quietly in the living room. Sophia sitting on one side of the room talking to Liam, Niall on another talking to Louis, and Harry and I across from them. Since I don't want to talk to either of them, I tell Harry what I want to say and he goes and talks to everyone else. 

Right now, Harry is talking with Liam and Sophia but Sophia isn't really paying attention. She's looking at me. With regret and sorrow. I look away from her because if I don't I know I'll just get up and talk to her. 

I look back up again to see Sophia pointing at her phone. I pull mine out and see a text. 

I'm sorry. 

I look to her. Her tears falling from her eyes. She looked back to her phone and texts something. I feel mine vibrate in my hands. 

Just let me explain please. 

I let a sigh out as I quickly texted her to meet me on the roof in 10 minutes. 

I stepped onto the roof. The sky wasn't totally dark and it wasn't totally light. 

"Zayn?" I turned around to see Sophia standing by the doorway, her arms wrapped around her body trying to keep herself warm. I walked over to her and shrugged my coat off. "Here." I draped it over her shoulders. 

Sophia shook her head. "Why are you being so nice to me?" She asked looking down at her shoes. I stood beside her, my hand gently brushing against hers. She looked down at them. They were so close, but they weren't touching at all. 

"Because I love you." I couldn't look her in the eyes. It hurt to much to look directly at her. 

"Even after what I did? You still love me?" I nodded my head. 

Sophia turned to me. "But why?" I looked down on her, my eyebrows raised. "You want to know why I still love you after you go and cheat on me with my band mate? If you haven't noticed Sophia you mean the world to me. And yes, I'm upset with you and especially Niall, but what can I do? Nothing."

"Zayn I'm so sorry. I never meant hurt yo-" 

I started to laugh. "But you did. It might not look like it now, but I'm hurt Sophia." 

"A-are you breaking up with me then?" She asked quietly. 

"I'm not sure." I turned around to leave when Sophia pulled me back. "Zayn please. Don't leave." She pleaded me. I looked into her bloodshot eyes. Why was she crying? I should be the one crying my eyes out. I should be mad and not this calm. Why can't I be angry? 

"I need some time alone alright. I'll talk to you soon." 

*****

Sophia POV 

I sat in the empty arena doodling in my writing book. There were pages and pages of letters inside this book that I've been writing all to Zayn trying to explain what happened between Niall and I, but none of them made any sense. I looked like whore or a slut for what I did to Zayn. I deserve those names being thrown into face. 

I looked up from my book to see the boys preparing for tonight's show. Zayn was standing on the other side of the stage and so was Niall. 

"Alright boy, lets go through More Than This one more time and this time get it right." The director spoke from the first row. The boys all nodded their heads as the music started. 

"I’m broken, do you hear me? I’m blinded, ‘cause you are everything I see. I’m dancin’ alone, I’m praying,
That your heart will just turn around. 
And as I walk up to your door, my head turns to face the floor, ‘cause I can’t look you in the eyes and say." Liam looked directly out to the empty seats.

"When he opens his arms and holds you close tonight, it just won’t feel right, cause I can love you more than this, yeah. When he lays you down, I might just die inside, it just don’t feel right, cause I can love you more than this. Can love you more than this." Harry finished his part and then Niall took center stage. 

Niall looked into my eyes. When I looked over at Zayn, he was shaking his head. "If I’m louder, would you see me? Would you lay down in my arms and rescue me? ‘Cause we are the same. You save me, when you leave it’s gone aga-" 

"Can't fucking keep your eyes off of her huh Niall?" Zayn spoke as he interrupted the song. My head snapped up to see Zayn stepping closer to Niall. "Man I wasn't looking at her." Niall responded calmly. 

"Don't fucking lie to me!" Zayn boomed. The track stopped playing and everyone was quite. 

"Zayn calm down." Liam said as he stood in the middle. 

"Liam I'm peachy. I'm fine but Niall here can't keep his eyes of my girlfriend." Zayn harshly spat out, his eyes never leaving Niall's. 

"Is this what all you Irish people do? Hook up with your mates girlfriends? Fucking twat." Suddenly Niall lunged onto Zayn. My eyes widened. I ran quickly down to the stage. 

"Niall stop your hurting him!" I screamed. I got closer to them but Harry held me back. "Harry let me go. This is my problem not yours." I spoke as I struggled against his tight grip. 

"If I let you go you'll get hurt to." He spoke into my ear. I shook my head frantically. 

Liam finally pulled Niall off of Zayn. Niall was breathing heavily, his hands covered with Zayn's blood. I finally got out of Harry's grip and walked over to Niall. An ear splitting crack was heard throughout the arena. I looked up at Niall breathing heavily whilst Niall held his cheek. 

"Don't ever fucking touch him again." I turned to Zayn and helped him up. 

"Lets get you cleaned up." I told Zayn quietly. 

*****

I gently wiped away the blood that was dipping from Zayn nose. He flinched a couple times as I cleaned him up. 

"Sorry." I mumbled under my breath. Once we were finished, I handed Zayn a clean shirt. 

"Thanks." He spoke as he slipped it on. I nodded my head in response. I was about to leave when Zayn pulled me back. 

"Don't leave." He whispered. I slowly turned around, my eyes never leaving his. "How'd all of this happen?" He questioned me. 

I nervously played with my fingers trying to figure out how to explain everything. 

"It all started the night we went out for dinner. After I brought you back to our room I decided to get a glass of water. Niall was in the living room watching TV so I decided to sit down with him. We eventually fell asleep on the couch together. It wasn't until the morning when things happened." I paused for a second trying to regain my thoughts. Zayn looked at me with pleading eyes. 

"I don't know how to explain this, but I vaguely remember someone kissing me. And when I thought that person was just you he ran away." I dropped my head in embarrassment. "He kissed you?" Zayn muttered. 

"No just on my neck and face." Zayn suddenly grabbed me and pushed my hair away from my neck. "He gave you a hickey?" Zayn questioned me his voice getting extremely louder. I felt his grip on my upper arm begin to tighten. "Z-Zayn let go your hurting me." I whimpered. I tried to pull my arm away but it only got tighter. 

"Zayn let go!" I screamed. Suddenly a rush of memories of Dominic and I in this same situation popped into my head. I fought against his grip until I got the courage and slapped him across his face. 

Everything was really quiet as I stood there my tears falling and Zayn holding his face with a shocked expression on it. 

"I need to go." Zayn quickly spoke as he ripped the door open and ran out the room. 

I collapsed to the ground in a fit of sobs. Why was this happening to me? I felt someone pull me up. "C'mon lets get you out of here." Liam whispered into my ear. 

*****

"Alright guys, you need to talk it out or going on tour together will never work." I looked up from my note book to see all the boys sitting down in the living room with Paul and Liam in the middle. I was sitting alone on the ground beside the fireplace, Zayn and Harry were on a couch together and across from them were Louis and Niall. 

"How bout we here Sophia talk since she hasn't said a word lately." Paul suggested. I nervously played with the sleeve of my shirt when I my eyes caught sight of the bruise Zayn had given me. I felt tears start to build up in my eyes and my mouth went totally dry. 

"I have nothing to say." I looked over to Zayn. His face looked angry, but his eyes were telling me a whole different story. 

"Alright, how bout you Niall. Have anything to say?" Liam asked. Niall shook his head no. I looked back down in my book to see a picture of Zayn and I. We were laughing and he was spinning me around. We looked so happy. I flipped it over to see Zayn's writing. 

Forever & Always…love you <3

I felt my tears start to fall even harder. "Sophia are you alright?" I looked up to see the guys staring down on me. I quickly wiped away my tears and nodded my head. 

"I'm fine. Don't worry." Zayn sighed and stood up. "This is bullshit. I'm not talking to him." Zayn spoke as he was leaving the room. "Why not? You scared Zayn? Think I'll ruin your relationship even more? Well guess what? It's already ruined." Niall spat. I looked at him with tear filled eyes but he just shrugged me off. 

Everyone started screaming and fighting. Paul and Liam were trying to pull the boys away from each other. 

"Stop!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at me. "Just stop." I cried. I grabbed my note book and ran over to my room. 

I started packing all of my belongings and zipped up my suitcase. I can't stay here any longer. 

*****

Zayn POV 

I scratched my back as I let a yawn out. I walked into the living room part of the hotel and looked around. It seemed oddly quiet. I sat down on the couch, my gaze landing on five letters and Sophia's song book. "Good morning Zayn." I heard Harry say as he plopped down next to me. I felt my whole body become tense as I continued to stare at the letters. 

"Zayn are you alright?" Harry asked. I quickly lunged for the letters. The was one for each of us. "Call the boys including Niall we need to talk." I quickly spoke. Harry got up and called all the boys. 

"Zayn I couldn't find Sophia. Wasn't she in Liam's room?" Harry asked out of breath. The rest of the boys piled into the room. "What's going on?" Louis asked. 

"S-she's gone." I whispered. I grabbed the envelope that said my name on it. Harry stood next to me. "What do you mean she's gone?" He asked. 

I handed each of them there letters. "She left these." I sat back down and pulled mine open. 

Liam POV 

I furrowed my eyebrows at the envelope Zayn handed to me with my name written on it. 

Dear Liam 

Hey Liam. I already miss you. Your amazing and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Please take care of the boys especially Zayn. I know he'll take it the hardest. I don't want to do this but it's for the best. You boys need to focus on your careers. I was never meant to be a singer so I might just go back to school. Who knows what I might do. Thanks for all your help these last few days it really helped that you cared so much. I needed a friend like you. I'm going to tell you where I'll be staying but you can't tell anyone else. Just call my phone. Thanks so much Liam. Love you. 

Sophia <3

Louis POV 

I pulled the letter open as I sat down on the arm rest of the chair. 

Dear Louis 

Hey Tommo. I know we haven't been as close as the rest of the boys but I still consider you to be one of my greatest friends. You always seem to have a smile on your face no matter what which I love about you. El is so lucky to have you. You both are truly amazing. But I have to be honest with you. Please stop taking Niall's side with this situation. I know your just helping a friend, but it's Niall's fault. It's mine to, but don't pick fights with Harry when Zayn and Niall are at each others throats. I made a mistake with Niall and I don't want you boys suffering from it. You and Harry were best friends and I want it to stay like that. Your Larry Stylinson remember. 

Sophia <3

Harry POV 

I looked around the room nervously as I started to read the letter. 

Dear Harry 

Hazza. I'm gonna miss you so much. I'm sorry I made everything so complicated for you boys. I never thought it would end up like this. Take care of your best friends they need you as much as you need them. Don't give up on them. I'm so happy we have so many memories that will last us a life time. Don't ever forget them. I know right now Zayn's probably reading his letter and is really upset but just tell him that it's not over. I just need a breather. I hope you can understand were I'm coming from. Tell Zayn I love him and this happened for a reason. 

Sophia <3

Niall POV 

My hands trembled as I opened the letter. 

Dear Niall 

I think this was the hardest letter to write out of all of them. I just didn't know how to write a letter to a person that I love and adore but at the same time hate. I know hate is a strong word Niall, but that's how I'm feeling right now. And I know I'll get over this feeling, but for now it's all I have. First I wanted to say I'm sorry. I know I made it seem like this was all your fault. I had a feeling you liked me more than a friend for a while but I ignored it because I only saw you as a friend. Niall you used to be my best friend. Why did it have to lead to this? I miss you and I just hanging out not caring what people thought about us. I miss our friendship. When you kissed me Niall I knew that things would change, not only between Zayn and I, but you and me to. I knew nothing would ever be the same when we kissed because that kiss meant something to me. If it were anyone else I would've brushed it off, but it was you Niall. And I can't shake this feeling. I don't want to admit it but I will. I like how you kissed me. I loved how you held me. I hate myself for saying that through this letter but I don't have any other way. For that small time that your lips were on mine I felt complete for once in my life. But you're not Zayn and I love Zayn. Just make it better with Zayn please. You guys are best friends don't fight over something as stupid as me. 

Love you lots, Sophia 

Zayn POV 

I took a deep breath as I started to read the letter. 

Dear Zayn

I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say but I'm sorry. I know your still mad at me so that's why I didn't tell you I was leaving. I need some time to myself. I might go home or somewhere else. Who knows. I want you to remember though how much I love you. I still love you, I always will. But for now I think it's best for you and I and your band to be apart. When I first met you I thought I'd never fall in love. I've been screwed over so many times that I never thought it would work. But it did and I really appreciate you for that. For never giving up on us when things got rough. You showed me what love really is. I love you so much Zayn and I hope one day will meet and be friends again. 
Hi, I'm Sophia Macy Villegas. 1'm 17 and I love the color purple and Zayn Javvad Malik. 

I felt my throat go dry. Three things fell out of the envelope. A cd, a photo and Sophia's promise ring. I first looked at the photo. It was Sophia and I. We were laughing and smiling. I was spinning her around. I flipped it over to see that there was some note on the back. 

Forever & Always…love you <3

I felt my eyes start to tear up. I hate this. I held Sophia's ring in my hand, this ring was supposed to be on her finger not in my hand. 

I looked up to the boys. They all looked upset. I walked over to the DVD player and inserted the disk. 

Suddenly Sophia popped up on the flat screen TV. 

"Hey guys. I'm assuming that you all read the letter right?" She said with a smile. I wiped away the tear that was falling. 

"Well it's 2am and my flight leaves at 4 so by the time you boys see this I'll be at home or whatever." She still had a grin on her face which surprised me. 

"Alright I'm in Liam's room." She laid down on the mattress beside Liam, resting her head next to his. 

"Take good care of them Liam alright. We know you care about them the most." She gave him a kiss on the cheek and gently got off his bed. 

"Okay I'm in Harry and Louis room." She spoke the camera not showing her but only Harry and Lou. 

"Hey Harry. I'm gonna miss your curls. Oh and promise me you'll be nicer to Lou. I hate when Larry fights." She quickly wiped a tear away and gave Harry a kiss.

"Tommo. I'm gonna miss you the least." She laughed out quietly. "Thanks for being a great friend." She gave his forehead a kiss and left the room. 

"Alright Niall's room." She stood my the foot of his bed. "I think my letter sums up how I feel about you Nialler." She got closer and put her hand on his face brushing away the messy blond hair. "Just don't get me mad anymore." She gave him a peck on his cheek and got up. 

"Okay this is my last stop." She climbed into my bed and wrapped her arms around my waist. Why didn't I wake up? I could've stopped all of this. "I'm gonna miss you so much it's crazy. I already miss you now even though your right next to me. I'm sorry for what I did to you Zayn. I guess I just wasn't good enough. You deserve better." The camera became dark and suddenly she was back in the living room. 

"I'm done here boys. I hope you have an amazing time during the tour. I'll be watching somewhere close by. Love you." 

The TV went back and she was gone.

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