Jane green... love at first coffee

OK, I was the first person to admit I didn't like sex... maybe it was because of my rows of previous failed relationships. Well- I say rows... I've had three. The first came about in year 7 of senior school. He only dated me for my malteasers though so I'm not sure it counts. The second was in sixth form. He was in a band. I occasionally listened to music.... Thats where the similarity's stopped. Then there's Dan. I met him in Tesco's and that set the tone for the rest of the relationship. Not an amazing line-up- trust me, I know. But nothing seemed as good as they did in books...

Jane always lived with her head in books. But now something- someone- is pushing her to be free and live her own story. But can you love someone you've only just met?

"Yes, But it takes years of practice to be IN love with that someone"

"I don't have years"

"You have all the time in the world"

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1. writers block

sprawled in the sand she traced his name, somehow so much more beautiful in sand than on the cold unfeeling pages of her notebook. She smoothed the sand into a perfect flat surface, obliterating any evidence of her hearts desires.... "Daniel" He whispered to her from behind...

"ugh" It was caught between a sigh and a pathetic moan. Not once had I ever had a writers block.... It's not like my books earned any money anyway: my job as a magazine fashion editor supported my apartment and addiction to coffee. But writing soothed me. I slapped my laptop shut with a satisfactory snap and rubbed at the bridge of my nose desperately;  think Jane, think.

"Nothing?" Tammy asked, refilling my cup. Tammy's face was sympathetic, he was one of my best friends and knew me like the back of his hand.

"Nada." I leaned forward in my chair, stressed out by the whole charade. He petted me motherly on the shoulder. Tammy was a twenty- something sweetheart and although his lack of boundaries offended my morals, he was utterly reliable "Don't worry Hun- all you need is a man in your life," as if. Me? I practically had a gnome growing- well- down there.

"Tammy you're the only man I'll ever have in my life! It's Saturday and I'm in the middle of no where, working on my laptop... The only reason you put up with me is because you work here!" He laughed casually, brushing off my dramatic antics. "Jane," He smiled, putting his hand on mine. I looked up at him feeling like Bambi- vulnerable and small. "If I weren't gay, I'd be up there like a shot," I spluttered my bitter coffee all over the old chestnut table that wobbled precariously in front of me. "To much information!" I exclaimed. He laughed mischievously at my little scene "Jane, you are such a prude." He sung.

"Ugh! I am not a prude, I just prefer to keep sexual intimacy within the pages of a book- Its less messy there," OK, I was the first person to admit I didn't like sex... maybe it was because of my rows of previous failed relationships. Well- I say rows... I've had three. The first came about in year 7 of senior school. He only dated me for my malteasers though, so I'm not sure it counts. The second was in sixth form. He was in a band. I occasionally listened to music.... Thats where the similarity's stopped. Then there's Dan. I met him in Tesco's and that set the tone for the rest of the relationship. Not an amazing line-up, trust me, I know. But nothing seemed as good as they did in books.

It wasn't like I was unattractive- just so not sexy. My shoulder length bob made me look about eighty and although I was slender, my chesty area was way to small for my taste. I had a small nose and massive eyes overall making me look young and utterly unmemorable. I was 27 and had finally settled into my job as a fashion editor for "Women's choice" magazine. I lived in an apartment in Yorkshire (The part where there wasn't any sheep OR cows) and had a cat- And as much as I loved Nala, that officially made me the dictionary lookup of the word "Prude". But I would never admit that.

"I'm so not!" I exclaimed again because he was looking me up and down like the bitchiest gay ever.

"Of course your not honey, and anyway, all's well the ends well- I was sick of you taking advantage of our free wi-fi." He sashayed back through the wooden swinging doors of the cafe, into the kitchen, before I could even reinforce why I was most defiantly not a prude. I smiled to myself exasperatedly. God- he could always make me smile when I was feeling down... I glanced around the cafe sipping at my bitterly strong coffee, sliding my precious lap top away from the mess I'd made earlier. The whole cafe took up only a few meters of space and, overall, seated around five people  in mismatched, worn out chairs and tables that smelt like home. The whole place looked like it might crumble to the ground at any moment... And all the walls and floors were paneled in wood and dated wall paper, looking as though they'd been put up in the 1920's due to the yellowing corners. 

Round the corner in front of me, lied the store though. And within its crooked walls were shelves and shelves (and good old fashioned piles) of yellowing under-priced books. An utter gold mine. It was the one of the many things that caught my attention when I first drove past this place- that and the fact it was utterly quaint, complete with a beautifully illustrated sign stating Books and coffee were readily available and a rusting bell that adorned the tiny wooden entrance. It was the perfect place to just go to and write, every once in a while.

Between the mountains of words stood only a tiny counter with an ancient till and a women even older. Betty runned the place, she was born some where in the eighteen hundreds and still thought I was a boy after seven years of me basically living here. I had given up reminding her of my name about a year ago...The main entrance lied within the front section of the shop, nestled within books, hidden from the cafe at the back. Other than that, the only other room was a tiny converted kitchen through the doors next to my table. One of Tammy's "modern" touch's to attract customers (hence the free wi-fi). The whole place was antique and quaint and when I was here, surrounded by the scents of black coffee, pine, dusty paper and home, words flew to me as if they were already at my fingers before I'd even thought of them.

But now... nothing. I stared at the constant pitter-patter of rain miserably sliding down the little window, above me. The only other life here was two middle-age men eating muffins silently, flicking happily through a withered old survival book. Presumably both hikers. If it weren't for the tourists that visited the hills, that were just out of town, I would surely be there only customer. Though considering what I spent here, they would probably get along fine.

The time on the dusty clock that hung depressingly from the disgustingly floral wall (That still miraculously worked) marked 12:00 and I ordered my lunch, hoping a decent meal would bring a spark of writing material."Jane, you need to get out" Tammy sighed sliding in to a battered arm chair that sat opposite me.

"Stop talking nonsense, if I left, who would there be to keep this places funds up?" I bit into my sandwich absently. 

"Honey, you are not the sole provider of this shops funds," He stated protectively. "We have lots of regulars." I nodded, not believing one word. Some things would never change. I would always be a prude, just like I would always be the only customer at this shop that bought anything substantial.But neither of us would admit that. Change was over-rated anyway. I had been doing the same routine for the past seven years and was quite contented.

"And, any way! Stop changing the subject!" Tammy squealed, doing quite a good jod of changing the subject himself,

"Are you still dating Troy," I asked, subtly.

"Ohhhh," Tammy sighed, pretending to fan himself, "That boy is a whole hunk of yummy hotness," 

"Uh-huh," I probed him to go on whilst I ate my ice cream. Vanilla like always of course.

"We had a date night at his house and we were watching date night- ohhhhh, and his sooo smart too! He knows so much about films and sports and what-not, He knew all about how the film was made and the directors and stuff" He leaned forward, sighing dreamily, "I think I might love him, Jane" My smile was heart felt and I was truly happy for Tammy... Usually Tammy was always like this in the first week of dating, but then on the second week something was always wrong- He doesn't love me enough  not enough money, doesn't let me choose whats on TV ect. But him and Troy had been dating for over a month and Troy was genuinely a good guy. Of course that made me feel completely depressed about the lack of love interests in my love. I was just waiting for Mr Right.

"I've got to go," I sighed after Tammy had finished his tirade of how wonderful Troy was.  "Good luck" He laughed. I nibbled my lip at the pouring rain outside. I reached into my ginormic bag and hoped that it was still there... "Aha!" I cried pulling out my blue and yellow umbrella,

"Nanny Mcphee does it again," He smiled looking up to the heavens helplessly, "Is there any thing you dont carry in that ugly bag of yours?" I clutched my trusty bag to my chest "I was a girl scout- always come prepared!" I pouted. 

"Of course, Hun," He hugged me girlishly and waved as I exited the shop, 

"Bye Betty," I smiled. She looked up like a confused baby bird and I smiled at her, she returned my wave with a toothless grin, obviously clueless to whom I was.

 I trudged through the rain and got into my vintage red bug, thankful to be out of the rain. Leaving my umbrella on the passenger seat I started up the car and turned up the radio, "Oh, your so naive,"

 

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