Breath

You ever think that a word like sex could change a life? Bet you didn't.. So why can a small word make people change or ruin or hurt or make people happy. Think about it sex can make a family or be a job. But why make yourself go through something that can be fake or just to make money? I guess that is the question I ask myself everyday. As I go to work I pass by all these things that are great jobs and just something I wish I could see my self doing. But as for right now I am stuck dancing on a pole and making men and women happy.. But am I happy? The money is great but the job it self is dirty and I'm not just talking about the pole. I think it all started when I got pregeant at the age of 16 once that happened my mom kicked me out... I had to find my way. Then I found you this lovely diary that will hold all my stories

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1. 10/23/11

Dear dairy,
Welcome to my life. I'm 18 a female and a single parent. I gave birth to my son Parker at the age if 16. Once I got pregnant I had to hide my my tummy from everyone. My father was very sick. There is the background. I told myself everyday that I wasn't and this was a bad dream day after day my life got worse all the stares and talking behind my talk. Would I say my baby was a mistake of course not he is the most beautiful thing ever. Except his father I hate that man he is the same age as me but how the hell could he leave me just to go sleep with other girls. I am not perfect but you fucking left me to go sleep with other girls yeah I was not ready for a baby but you could have stayed and helped me but no you had to fucking leave. Now I am alone with no family behind my back dealing with mental sickness and baby. This is not fair losing my father and my mother at almost the same time. Having to get kicked out then have to sleep with men and sell my self to get the needs I need for me and my son I had to do what it takes to make sure he had a life and not a death. Am I good parent?
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