Closed Eyes

Rose remembers nothing of her past lives. It isn't usual for people of the Memoir tribe to come into being without a past life but Rose doesn't seem to have one... Or so she thinks...

In dimension 51 Somnium's inhabitants are beings made from the remains of the deceased from Earth. Each created to be the age they were when their former selves were their happiest the memories of their past selves remain in their beings from creation till death their personality, and such already manifested thanks to their past selves. Whilst memories and such are created in the duplicates of their past selves, their appearances are strikingly different. Longer limbs and sometimes dis-figuration is common in those not created in the planet's core facilities.

Rose was made from the planet's core facilities. Number 93 765 234th to be exact. But unlike the others she has no idea who she is... Who her past was... Why she is alive. By default she is a failure. But thanks to kindness is kept to find herself.

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1. Awakening

Pain. It surrounds me like a layer of skin so tight it feels like my blood is about to seep from it's pores. My body is lead therefore I am like a weight being dragged down so deep it's almost as if I'm falling into the depths of a never ending mass of something cold... Wet...

"The ocean," I feel myself smile gently for some strange reason. I then frown.

"How do I know what it feels like?" My eyes open slowly and I'm not. In the ocean that is. Brightness surrounds me and my eyes are barely open for a moment before they fly shut again.

"She's awake." The pain lessens... Slowly. Like it's disintegrating into nothingness... Leaving me an empty shell.

"She's stabilizing..." Another voice speaks. My eyes twitch as the light provokes them to open again. I squeeze them tighter to stay shut.

"Not falling for that again." The lights lessen and I felt my body shift to move upwards slightly then tilt forward.

"Rose. Will you open your eyes now, dear?" One of the voices from earlier asks. I'm not sure who Rose is, but I open my eyes anyway as if the kind voice is talking to me. When I meet a pair of grey-blue eyes I reel back suddenly. The withered face smiles gently before the owner of that face reaches a hand to stroke my cheek.

"I am Penny." she informs me gently. My mind however is not on her words, but on her touch. The feel of her old, withered hand is strangely settling. Like I know her... But I don't.

 

My brow creases and I feel a strange sense of loss... There is something missing... Gone.

"Your things will be here soon and you will be able to settle with the others within the core quarters if you wish..." Penny continues to speak as I look around. Masses of blue light surround me they hold things up, move things around... The walls are glass so I can see people walking through the halls around me although it's like they cannot see me. Like I'm...

"Rose!" Penny's sharp voice cuts me out of my reverie, I look around before my eyes meet her concerned ones. I taste something strange as a warm liquid fills my mouth, the pain emanating from my lip, however, gives me a clear indication I've bitten it. My hands moves to my mouth as I feel my teeth release their hold on it.

"Oh, dear..." Penny's voice seems miles away as I pull my hand away to see blood. It's red. So... Red.

"Rose, stay calm the specialist team will be here soon." Penny assures me though she seems to be shouting somewhere far off.

 

My eyes grow weary and my arms grow weak. Falling back I feel the pain again but unlike before I feel myself slip into the same nothingness as the pain had before, and all is good.

 

*     *     *     *     *

"You are in dimension 51, planet... Somnium." The man before me repeats for the fifth time as I stare at him wordlessly. His slicked back hair seems to change from red to blue... It's funny because though it isn't familiar like other things I have the distinct impression the colour changes with his mood. Right now it's a bright red.

"Rose!" His voice demands my attention and my eyes shift from his hair to his furrowed brow and narrowed eyes.

"Dimension fifty-one. Planet Somnium." I repeat almost like a robot... Or like those machines they have coming in and out of the room every few minutes asking me questions.

"She's got no memory whatsoever!" I hear another voice hiss behind him. My gaze rises to above his head to the glass wall behind him. Specifically to Penny who seems to be discussing with another man in a lab coat furiously... Or so I reckon she is. The jagged hand movements seem so precisely practiced that I reckon if for a moment they forget they are meant to be acting calm they could break a wall with their flabber-grating.

"You may leave now." The man with colour-changing hair informs me. I nod, standing before moving across the floor silently. I catch a glimpse of my reflection my soft, blue eyes calm and somewhat unemotional compared to those around me, my lips are heart shaped, my nose like a ski-slope and my hair a mass of gentle waves that cascade around my shoulders. If it wasn't for the white shift I wore I could have passed for being the same as the others. Except I'm not... Apparently.

 

Walking through the halls of the core centre is like nothing I've ever done before. Literally. As it turns out it's because I don't have the memories of what I've supposedly done before. The floor is the softest grass - how I know that, I'm not sure - and the ceiling is the clear blue light from before flowing with sparks of what look like little lightening flashes. They're pretty cool too.

"Morning!" Another person I don't know calls from the other side of the hall. I smile and wave back as the energetic little boy is led to another door by yet another man in a lab coat. I find my way to the open garden and sit beneath the tree that seems to be where everyone like myself is sent to stay. Meaning, no one.

"Maybe if you knew what you were missing out on, you would care." I chastise myself as I sit down and fold my legs beneath me as I place my hands behind me a lean back. The air is warm as always but the breeze is cool and seems to spiral around me as I close my eyes and absorb the calmness of the surroundings.

 

"Rose?" A voice asks, I turn immediately. Not because it's my name, but because apparently it's what I am called here in this strange place. My eyes meet a pair of green eyes so piercing my breath catches for some reason...

 

"I'm Rose," I smile as I look into his eyes. They're so green that I feel like I'm trapped in them.

"Hartworth." I add as I accept the hand he holds out to me. The moment my hand clasps his a shooting feeling seems to run up my arm and our eyes lock again followed by an easy smile as we shake hands.

"I'm Ryan. Ryan North." His still holding my hand and I feel like I'm about to collapse if he doesn't let go. I probably would if he did anyway. My legs are like the jelly my mum mixes up on Sunday dinners after church but I've never felt so alive or aware or what's happening so I try to hold onto one last bit of a sane thought...

'If you faint. His going to think you're weird.' My smile widens for no apparent reason.

"You're in my economics class... Right?" He asks finally letting go. I continue to smile and nod,

"Yeah... Uh-h, I joined late. Maybe that's why we haven't spoken before?" I ask even though if I had enrolled into that class the same time as him we probably wouldn't have spoken before that moment.

"Yeah. Look, I'm heading to grab something to eat. Want to come along?" He asks. I'm nodding yes, and moving my bag strap higher up my shoulder as we begin to walk along side eachother.

"You a vegetarian?" He asks suddenly. I shake my head immediately.

"No, sorry. Meat all the way." I laugh cautiously hoping it isn't too awkward. He seems to relax.

"No apologies needed. I'm a meat-eater too." He cracks causing me to smile...

 

"Rose," I'm looking at him. Like actually looking at him. The same face... But that's not...

"Rose." He touches my cheek and I feel myself tear up.

"What the hell...?" Penny suddenly appears from nowhere and grabs the guy's shoulder before wrenching him back.

"Rose!" Ryan is trying to reach for me... I'm shaking. He knows me. He knows me... And I know him. My eyes close and I start to feel myself drift back into the pain.

"Honey, everything's going to be okay..." Penny's voice is gentle as I feel her hand on my cheek. As I slip away, however, I know everything is not.

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