I Finally Found You (Completed)

Today, my name is Olivia Moore. But, it used to be Erin Parker. I had grown up with a normal life in Holmes Chapel, England. I had two of the best parents a child could have. Though I didn’t have any siblings, I had a best friend, Harry.

But, that all changed two years ago. Why? Because I died...or at least that’s what everyone thought. They all thought that I was in a car explosion when I was 16, when someone had planted a car bomb. My friends, family, and anyone I had ever known lost me.

But in reality, none of that happened. Yes, I lost the people around me, but that was because I went into hiding. Three days before I “died,” I saw something that I shouldn't have, so my life was in danger. I didn't really have very much time to say goodbye to everyone I loved. The fact that they didn't know what really happened kills me, they all think I’m dead, that I’m never going to come back. Until now.

Copyright © 2012 -> Iridescent Artist


42. Chapter 41




I was awoken by the sound of my alarm on my phone. Had the night already gone by so quickly? It seemed like a minute ago when I woke up from what I thought was crying in the middle of the night. 

I groaned as I searched for my phone, turning the ringing off. I looked to see that Erin was still fast asleep, but I didn't want to wake her while I got ready. I would let her rest up until I had to go.

I set my feet on the ground and slowly, dragged myself into the bathroom with today's clothes. After a quick shower and taking forever to turn my shirt outside-in, I came back to see Erin sitting up, messing with her locket.

A couple of tear drops stained the duvet that was covering her lap. I quickly ushered myself over to her to try to get her to stop crying. I felt like I was hurting her, like this was my fault. And it was. We had fallen in love with each other, and now I was leaving her behind.

I knelt in front of her on the bed. Taking her face into my hands while wiping the tears away with my thumbs, I said, "Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry. Please don't, love." I brought her in for a hug.

"I can't," she sobbed, wetting my shirt, "I love you and this sucks."

"I know, I hate it as much as you do. And I'm coming back for you, don't you worry," I said, realizing that I was starting to cry as well.

The rest of the half hour was basically the same. It was full of hugging, kissing, I-love-you's, and crying. But the time eventually came, "Call me when you get to Australia. I don't care what time it is when you land," she said as we hugged again.

"I'll call you when I get to LA first," I responded.

"I also want you to do one other thing." 

"What's that?"

She sighed into my chest, "I want you to not worry about me when you are there. Just have fun with the boys."

"You make it sound like you want me to not think about you," I chuckled.

"Just...you know..."

I checked my phone to see that Paul and the boys would be here any minute to pick me up to go to the airport. And on cue, I got a text from Louis, telling me that they would be here soon.

I looked up from my phone to see Erin with sad eyes. They were red, full of tears, and her face was flushed. She still had bed-head as well. She burst out, crying.

My vision started to get blurry as I grabbed her face, I knew this would be the last time we would do this. I kissed her hard, like it was the last day on earth. I brought hands down to her waist to pull her closer as she gripped onto my shirt. I sucked on her bottom lip one last time until we had to break apart, ending with a much softer kiss before we had to say goodbye.

"I love you Erin Jocelyn Parker," I said, remembering that's pretty much how she said goodbye to me in Holmes Chapel.

She noticed too, giving a weak smile, "I love you Harry Edward Styles."

I opened to door and turned around to hug her again. And before I left, I kissed her on the top of the head. Eventually, we had to close the door. Giving her one last look, I did.

I dragged myself down the stairs, not wanting to take the lift. I felt like I owed it to myself, for causing Erin so much pain. I gave some sniffles on the way, not really crying if people heard me as much as I should've.

Maybe it was because my body felt numb, like I hadn't taken in everything yet. But my body already ached for her. I wanted to just kiss her lips and hold her in my arms. I wanted to smell her apple shampoo on her hair whenever I breathed her in.

I opened the door to a cold breeze, seeing the black car waiting for me. I climbed inside, placing my backpack in front of me.

"Harry? Are you okay?" Louis asked the second I closed the door.

I looked at each of the boys in the car, Liam, Zayn, Louis, and Niall, not saying anything. They all had sympathetic looks on their faces.

"No," I choked out.

Louis unbuckled his seat belt and knelt next to me, letting me cry on his shoulder. He and Liam understood my situation the most, having girlfriends of their own. They knew how much it hurt inside, to know that you wouldn't be seeing your loved one for, what it seemed, the longest amount of time possible. 

He gave me small pats on the back, "I know, I know. This is a shitty situation, but you will both be alright.”

I released him, wiping away the wetness on my face. He sat back up into his chair. But he would still watch my every movement to make sure I was alright.

My energy seemed to be gone. My sadness had taken it from me completely.

Later on in the car ride to the airport, I checked behind me, to see Zayn with his head against Liam, who was somehow sleeping upright and straight. But Niall, on the other hand, was sprawled out with his mouth flopping open.

I decided to be like them, and pass out.





That's what he was.


It hurt so much. I felt like I lost all energy in my body the second he closed the door, leaving me to fall against it, crying. I was curled up in a ball with my face in my hands. 

Nothing seemed right, right now. If I were to look back at how my life was like two months ago, it was nothing like this. I wouldn't have ever expected that I would be crying my eyes out over Harry. I wouldn't have expected that I was hurting because he was leaving this time, not the other way around instead.

I, somehow, crawled to my bed to try to fall back asleep. But I couldn't. It would be expected of me to be able to because of my lack of sleep last night. I wanted to be able to close my eyes so badly to forget about everything that was happening right now, but I couldn't. No matter how hard I tried, my brain wouldn't go into sleep mode for me. 

How would this relationship even work? Not only was it always going to be mostly long distance, but I was dating Harry Styles, a member of One Direction and a celebrity that was known globally. 

How would he be able to do it? Being constantly asked at every interview that he ever does, on whether or not he has a girlfriend. He would never be able to give them an honest answer. It may not sound like that big of a deal to say that he did, but I knew it meant a lot to him. 

Also, I was nothing special. He was always going to have girls throwing themselves at him, probably some that were better than me. Would he go for them?

Luckily, all of the doubts in my head went away as I felt the locket around my neck. It wasn't very easy to ignore. Though it was lightweight, it still had enough of a tug on my neck to remind me that it was there, which is why I never wanted to take it off.

It not only was a memory of Harry, but it was also almost like my reassurance of him and our relationship.

I missed his strong arms, wrapping around me, sometimes surprising me when I didn't expect them to be there. I missed his deep kisses. I missed his voice. But I most of all missed his face. Though I could just go on Google and type in his name and get thousands of pictures instantly, it wasn't the same.

A picture can't bore into my eyes. A picture couldn't bite its lip when it is unsure. A picture couldn't shake its head, laughing. I picture couldn't create memories with me. And a picture couldn't tell me stupid cheesy jokes, how much it loves me, how their day went, and possibly the best advice anyone has ever given me.

To fall for them.

To fall in love until I can't stop thinking about them.

To fall in love so that I smile whenever I hear their name.

To fall in love so that I feel like I need their touch to stay alive.

It all sounds so attached and all, but it's the best feeling in the world. I loved him, but now he was gone. 


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