Back For You

They say friendship lasts forever. Louis Tomlinson and Lillian Brie thought that this statement was completely true. But when one "yes" from Simon Cowell changes their fate together they need to find their way back together. After years of solitude, Louis comes back to Doncaster for a visit. Just as he promised. Because when two people are meant to be, they will always find their way back.

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15. Day 14 - Falling Slowly

A/N: BOOM BADA BING SURPRISE! Look what I made!:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7hbVSklnyM&feature=youtu.be

OMG I spent like 02398523109 hours making that so please watch it and love it. If you scroll over to the right I did put it in the multimedia section. So please love it and watch it 29346789 times it would make my day! LOVE YOU ALL!

LILY POV

I woke up with a throbbing head and sore limbs. My eyes stung so much that I could barely open them, as soon as I opened them they snapped shut stinging from the light. Eventually, they opened. I found myself in a dark room with many cardboard boxes. It smelt wet, almost as if the whole place had been flooded. After several failed attempts to get up into a sitting position I flopped down onto the ground looking myself up and down. I was tied up in some sort of rope. I was no longer dressed in my black clothes, instead I was in just my underwear. I looked down at my bruised and battered body, I saw bruises that were turning purple and cuts that were still bleeding. I began struggling underneath the rope attempting to free myself from its grasp. Eventually, the pain overcame me and I lay my head down in defeat.

"God damnit," I heard a voice speak and a bottle smash onto the floor, "She's gone... my beautiful baby is gone."

I decided to not respond to the voice, instead I lay still and once again closed my eyes. I heard footsteps get closer and closer as the stench of alcohol grew more potent. 

"Damn you Ruthie," he said kicking me in the stomach, I bit the inside of my mouth trying to stifle a scream, "My beautiful Lillian is now gone from this earth. You were never there for either of us and you weren't there when she needed. You let her slip away. You slipped away. I hope you rot in this basement and die."

"How could you say that?" I whispered out, 

"SHUT UP!" he screamed kicking me in the stomach again making pain radiate through my body. I tried to reach up to my mouth as bile threatened to make an appearance. But since my hands were tied to my sides it came up on the floor. I rolled over trying to get away from the awful smell as he ran out of the room, slamming the door and leaving me with only one light. I stared at the floor. It was stained red, judging by the state of my body it was my blood that was staining the floor. I suddenly felt light headed and woozy, my world once again returned to darkness.

LOUIS POV

I woke up on Lily's doorstep. Judging by the sun it was about midday. My head ached and my world spun, how much did I drink last night? Niall was no where to be seen and I couldn't remember much. But I had an awful feeling in the pit of my stomach, I did something, something bad. I forced my eyes open to access my surroundings. As I looked around something caught my eye, there were stains of red all over her front porch. No, I didn't do it did I? Did I hit her? Did I hurt her in my drunken state?

I scrambled to my feet running into the house finding it particularly strange that the door was wide open. Did I break in? More blood was on the floor. I ran up the stairs, past the kitchen and the living room straight into her bedroom. It was messed up, everything had been thrown out of the cupboards and clothes were strewn all over the floor. Did something break into her house? Or was this merely one of her temper fits? Questions ran through my mind as a book caught my attention, it laid sprawled open on her desk. I picked it up instantly recognising her handwriting.

To Whoever Cares, 

You know that terrible feeling in your stomach that you get when you're sad? Well luckily I've gotten pass that stage. But even though the physical pain is gone I don't think that I have ever experienced such terrible emotional pain. My stomach feels twisted, my head feels heavy, my eyes sting from all the tears that have spilt from my eyes. As I sit here writing this and reading through past entries I realised just how much Louis meant to me. 

I pretty much centred my life round him, And when he went off to X-Factor I pretty much lost it, literally lost it. And I felt so lucky when I discovered writing, it distracted me, it gave me a purpose. To this day he hasn't seen anything that I wrote in that time and I don't intend for him to. Everything was terrible in that time, a messy concoction of all that was terrible in my life. 

I watched him fall in and out of love so many times. It really killed me when he said that he was dating Eleanor. And I know that I told him that we had a future but sometimes I just get so trie of all this make up and break up thing. I don't understand why we can't just love each other and stay together. Because I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. And I can never say that enough times.

And the funny thing is that Louis is the only one that knows me. Cherie and Marley are great but Lou just gets me. He understands why I hurt, he knows when to say things, he knows when not to say things. I tell him everything and the funny thing is that he has never once used anything that I have told him against me. And I admire and love him so much for that. In our fights it could've been so easy to blurt something out but he hasn't. Because he gets it. 

Seeing Derek today was awful, the alcohol on his breath brought back memories that I wanted to forget. Memories about the man that I call my father. He really scared me, alcohol scares me, being round alcohol scares me and in that moment, I didn't know what it felt like to be not scared. Because the truth is, I feel very scared. Not only then but I'm scared of the future, what it might bring. 

I don't want to be the pathetic ex-girlfriend of Louis Tomlinson from One Direction. I want to do something with my life and I have no idea what. I feel really stupid most of the time, centring myself round a guy. I'm not Bella Swan from twilight. I'm Beyonce, I don't need a man to make me feel good. But he makes me feel better, better than what I am and I think I make him feel the same way. Or at least I hope I do, or did. 

My phone is starting to ring now so I have to go, hopefully I make a habit of writing in this more often. I haven't checked the caller ID yet, I'm worried it could be Louis. But at the same time I'm hoping it could be. I don't know what to feel anymore but one thing I know for sure is that I love him. So whoever cares, I'm signing off. Byebye. 

My mouth was open by this time, she had written this recently. There was an awful feeling in the pit of my stomach as memories flooded back to me of the events of last night. The words that I spoke to her, how I used her father against her, something that I promised that I would never do. Hurt her. I had to find her, I had to apologise to her. But then I remembered the blood stains on the carpet. Someone had broken into here last night, I ran down the stairs screaming her name,

"LILY!" I shouted desperately "LILY!"

I heard a groaning sound come from the kitchen which I ran towards, there I found a frail body across the floor. By instinct I screamed and kicked the person in the head earning yet another groan. Was this the person that kidnapped Lily? Did she get away in time? But as he turned around to face me I was disappointed with the face of Derek.

"Where is she?" I asked through a clenched jaw,

"Who?" he moaned turning around on his side,

"Lily," I managed to get out, the place smelt of alcohol. I assumed the worst, someone had broken in and Derek was too pissed to help her. But before I could be too mad at him I felt mad at myself, I should have been here not him.

"I hurt all over..." he groaned rubbing his sore limbs, his eyes opened wide as he jumped to his feet, he gained a sudden rush of energy as he started replicating my earlier actions screaming out Lily's name. "GOD DAMNIT!" 

"What happened here?" I asked following him around the house as he checked everywhere, 

"Some man took her," he babbled out continuging to look around the house.

"Did you see what the man looked like?" I asked getting out my phone getting ready to call the police,

"I can't remember much of his face, but he tried to punch her so I got in the way, I defended her just so you know. I know you're thinking the worst of me but I ask you not to."

"God damnit I have every right to be mad at you," I shouted, 

"Never said you didn't," he said plainly before continuing his search, "But I did protect her, check my back for bruises if you don't believe me."

I took a deep breath before continuing the conversation, "Do you remember anything else from last night?" I pushed,

"He called her Ruthie," he said in such a tone implicating that he was confused, "Did she change her name or something?"

"No, Ruthie is her mom's name," I said finally understanding what happened, Lily's Dad had come looking for Lily's Mum and just like old times, he couldn't tell the difference.

"I don't understand, I thought that her mum's name was Elizabeth...?" he asked finally stopping at the staircase, his eyes still darting around. 

"Lily's Dad called her mum Ruthie, something to do with a T.V show 7th Heaven..." I mumbled now looking around myself, I wanted to believe that she was here, that she was safe. 

"I'm calling the police!" I shouted from the kitchen as I dialled the number, 

"I wouldn't do that!" he shouted back,

"Why not?" I screamed in frustration. He was so stupid, why would Lily even fancy him?

"He left a note," he shouted, I ran into the room snatching the piece of paper from his hands reading it over. 

Call the police and Ruthie is dead. 

I scrunched up the note throwing it across the room in anger, I could do nothing. 

"I'm still calling the police," I grumbled dialling the number again,

"Fucking idiot!" he shouted taking my phone away from me, 

"You give that back!" I screamed grabbing for it, but for an injured man he was quick. And since he was versing me, who was still light headed from last nights drinking, it wasn't a fair fight. "We can still call the police, its not like he has any way of knowing."

"God! Have a breath mint!" he said fanning the air, 

"Don't tell me what to do! Lily is probably out there being tortured and we are sitting here. We need to find her or he's going to kill her anyways! So don't fucking tell me to have a breath mint!" his stance remained the same, with the phone behind his back, his eyes were slightly squinted giving me the idea that he was analysing me. What did he think I was? Some sort of animal?"GIVE ME BACK MY PHONE! EVERY SECOND THAT PASSES COULD BE ANOTHER SECOND THAT LILY IS BEING TORTURED! DON'T YOU FUCKING GET IT WE NEED TO FIND HER!" 

"You need to relax!" he said, "You freaking out will not help us find her! Us fighting will not help us find her! We need to sit down, make a game plan." 

"YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!" I shouted, "WE DON'T HAVE TIME TO DO THAT! I SCREWED UP! I NEED TO FIND HER! I NEED TO TALK TO HER" 

"Then lets find her!" he said, "But we can't involve the police, think about the media publicity around it. He will find out that people are searching for her, he will kill her sooner and he will get rid of all evidence that she was ever there. I know she could be being tortured and beaten right now but I would rather her have that done than her be dead. Lily is a strong girl, we need to keep calm and think strategically. If you love her as much as I do you will help me."

I sunk to the floor placing my face in my hands, all of the things he was saying, he was right. He was so good for her, she would have such an easy life with him. They would probably grow old together, with some kids. He was an idealistic option for her. And what would I bring to her? Pain, harm, hate.

"You love her that much?" I asked continuing to look at the floor, 

"I told her every chance I got," he mumbled sitting down next to me, "She never said it once to me, she always responded with something quirky like 'Ditto' or 'I love me too' something adorable like that... How about you? Did she ever say that she loved you?"

"All the time," I breathed feeling partially sorry for the poor guy, 

"I knew it," he whispered under his breath,

"Knew what?" I asked 

"That she loved you, I could see it in the pictures she showed me. I just didn't want to believe it..." 

"I'm sorry for stealing your girl..." I mumbled, a sad attempt at an apology as I realized what I had ruined

"She was never mine to begin with," he responded "I see that now, but we need to find her."

"We?" I asked, "Why would you want to find her? You cheated on her."

"It was all set-up," he said handing me my phone, "El and I both saw it. But it doesn't change the fact that she is special and we need to find her and I know you don't like me-"

"That's not true,"

"Don't lie to me, I can see you're holding a grudge. But right now we have one common objective and we need to work together, so do you know anything?"

"I know where she might be," I said nodding my head to thank him for handing back my phone

"Then what are we waiting for?"

***

I stood in front of a rather small house on the farside of Doncaster. I stood leaned against a car with Derek, Niall, Harry, Liam and Zayn. We decided to leave the girls at home, nervous for their safety if they came to join us. Around us there were policemen, many of them disguised as normal people. We alerted them of the situation and they agreed to make this a secret operation.

This was the first place I thought of when I thought of the many things that Lily had told me. She had told me that this is where her Dad and her Mum first met. I figured that this place would be fitting. I looked to all of them giving a slight nod of my head before we all walked forwards, prepared to save our friend. 

LILY POV

I was losing blood, I was losing blood very quickly. I couldn't tell where because while I blacked out a blindfold somehow found its way round my eyes. I laid there, completely lifeless. I was bruised, battered and bashed. I knew that he was sitting there, I felt his looming presence and his drunken breath. He was mumbling things, rambling on about useless things that I could no longer make out.

I felt as I was being swallowed, swallowed into a deep pool of blackness. I was holding on for dear life, holding onto any strands of life that I had left knowing that I would soon have to let go. I decided to live the last moments of my life thinking about nice things. But the only thing that came to my mind was Louis. Louis William Tomlinson, the boy that had stolen my heart. I smiled in contentment happy that he would be the last thought on my mind. But i had no way of telling him and I ended things so badly. 

I didn't expect him to find me, but just as that thought crossed my mind I heard the door being broken down. I heard muffled shouts and screams coming from somewhere that seemed miles away. I could only recognize one though, Louis. I reached out for him but the physical state I was in stopped me from doing any such thing. 

That was when I felt a sudden pain to my leg, glass cutting into the flesh. I heard smashing noises, someone was in pain. I dearly hoped that it wasn't Louis. More pain shot up my leg I winced in pain but when I felt a soft hand on my face and the blindfold come off of my eyes. I painfully opened my eyes to find crystal blue ones staring into mine. His face looked worried, sweat dripping down his face in stress. I could feel myself slipping away, feel myself slowly letting go, losing my grip on reality. I stared into his blue eyes one last time before closing my eyes as my world turned to darkness. I listened to him shouting my name and felt his lips press against mine before finally letting go.

LILY POV

I was trapped. Trapped in that terrible space between reality and the black swirling vortex that was death. I could hear things going on around me, I could feel things going on around me but no matter how hard I tried, I could not see things around me. I could tell that he was there, Louis was there. He came back for me. 

I was confused and conflicted unsure whether to be thankful for him saving me or for me to be mad at him for his previous words, either way I had no way of communicating my feelings to him. I felt myself being picked up, being sprawled across a sheet. I heard shouting, muffled voices. But something that I so clearly made out was Louis's breathing. I could hear the heavy panting sounds he was making, his denies for any medical help insisting that all attention was turned towards me. 

What sort of state was he in? Was he injured? I felt his warm hand grasped mine as a door slammed shut and I started to move very quickly. I heard whirring, sirens, alarms and all sorts. Eventually I centred in around listening to Louis's breathing. I felt things being wrapped around me, my clothes being taken off probably being replaced by old hospital clothes. 

I no longer felt the pain of my bruised joints, my cut skin. I felt like I was floating, floating in a dark world where nothing could reach me, where I would never be saved. Would this be my end? I longed to look over to Louis, to lay multiple kisses on his face. If I was to do die now I would have many regrets, the main one being him. He held my hand until I heard more shouting, until I felt wind woosh in my face as I was quickly brisked away. I heard him shouting out my name wildly, calling for me. I found myself internally shouting out his name as well. I felt myself growing weaker, slowly weaker. Slowly drifting. Slowly being released from the terrible space and slipping into death. But I held on, I would not give up this fight, I would stay alive. No matter how much it hurt, I had to get back to him.

LOUIS POV

I stood outside of her hospital door banging on the door screaming out her name, they didn't understand. I needed to be with her, she needed me with her, I needed her with me. I saw a bunch of doctors and surgeons rushing around, I had been given an icepack for my bruised head. I had also been loosely bandaged, they wanted to do more, stitch me up like a teddy bear but thats all the help that I would accept. 

Cold waterfalls of tears ran down my face as I continued to bang on the door my fists clenched in desperation. I banged against the door until my fists turned red and bruised, instead I slunk down against the wall with my head in my hands. I looked up from my hands to see Marley crying in a corner banging her head against the wall. Soon enough Harry was there to hold her, comfort her. I wished that I could be in his position, holding the one that I loved but for all that I knew I would never be able to do that again.

Cherie was handeling it surprisingly well, sitting on her phone tapping her foot against the ground to the tune of one of our own songs. Liam kept his arm around her the entire time as she leaned into him continuing to scroll through her phone. 

I didn't know where Niall or Derek were but it annoyed me knowing that they weren't here. I found myself watching everyone carefully, currently it was the only thing distracting me from Lily. When I felt a presence to my right I turned to find a doctor. I instantly stood up asking him,

"Will she live?"

"She is currently in a comatose state," he began but I interupted him knowing that he was diverting from my original question,

"Will she live?"

"Her bones seem fine and her bruises will heal in time but she has received alot of damage to her internal organs and she has lost alot of blood and broken some bones, including her leg.."

"Will she live?" I repeated,

"Mr Tomlinson I am not authorized to tell you that as of now, you are unstable."

"Will she live?" I reiterated, 

"Mr Tomlinson-"

"Don't Mr Tomlinson me!" I shouted "Will she live?"

"The odds say no." he said, my hands turned to fists, I should have been there to protect her instead of out drinking with Niall something that I know she is so against. I was a terrible person. A terrible friend.

"I need to see her," I said pushing past him, I stormed into the room where I found multiple surgeons bunched up around her bed blocking my view from her. 

I slowly took steps forward clearing my throat to alert them of my presence. They turned around wide-eyed obviously on some sort of coffee rush so that they could stay up all night. As I walked towards her bed they parted like the red-sea eventually allowing me to see her. 

"Leave." I ordered as I sat down on a chair next to her bed,

"Mr Tomlinson-" 

"I said leave!" I shouted back. 

They all hurried out of the room once clicking some thing on a machine. I waited until they were out of the room before I grabbed her hand softly and started to cry. 

"I'm sorry..." I whispered, not that she could hear me but it felt better pretending that she could, "I should've been there, I shouldn't have been drinking, I shouldn't have said those mean things to you about your father. If you die now, all I can say is that I'm sorry and that I promise to you that I will never fall in love with anyone else." 

I opened  my eyes to see her with tubes poking in and out of her, her chest only slightly rising and falling. Her cheeks had lost that natural pink tinge that she usually had, it was replaced with purple bruises lining her face. To the normal eye she would look like another patient, totally normal. But to me she was still beautiful, in her bruised and battered state she was still beautiful. Her long eyelashes cascaded over her eyes, how badly I wanted them to flicker open and to look at me as she smiled. 

I heard the door open behind me but I ignored it keeping my gaze on her,

"Am I asleep, am I awake or somewhere in between. I can't believe that you are here and lying next to me. Or did I dream that we were perfectly entwined" I sung remembering the night that she first heard the song, the warmth in her eyes was strong that night, 

"Like branches on a tree, or twigs caught on a vine," Liam finished sitting down next to me with Cherie in his arms, 

"Like all those days and weeks and months I tried to steal a kiss," Niall sang going to the other side of the room and leaning against the wall, 

"And all those sleepless nights and daydreams where I pictured this," I completed not even bothered by his presence, "I'm just the underdog who finally got the girl and I am not ashamed to tell it to the world."

That's when Harry, Liam and I broke out into the chorus singing it to our individual girl. The difference was that Liam and Harry actually got to hold their girl, look into their eyes, maybe even plant a kiss on her lips. I instead sat propped up against her hospital bed holding her hand against my forehead, praying to feel warmth radiating through her once more.

"Truly, madly, crazy, deeply in love with you, in love with you," I sung my voice hitching at the end, I missed her saying those words to me already. Though it had only been a day knowing that that day she had said those words to me could be her last hurt. I didn't feel as if I could sing anymore, the boys seemed to get this message as they quietly walked out of the room leaving me with her.

Tears ran down my face as I stared at hers, her mouth slightly open, her eyes shut. I would finish the song, finish it for her.

"Truly, madly, deeply I am. Foolishly completely falling. And somehow you kicked all my walls in. So baby say you'll always keep me, Truly, madly, crazy, deeply in love with you..."

the end of the song trailed off as I heard the monitor quicken just a little bit as I ended the song before returning back to it's normal, extremely slow state.

I stayed in that position, propped up against the bed watching her for hours on end. It wasn't until the sun started to go down when I heard silence, the beeping had stopped. Thats when everything started moving in slow motion. I screamed out to doctors frantically who came rushing into the room. I was being pushed out of the room, quickly as they started to operate. I kept hold of her hand for as long as I could placing a lingering kiss on it before being pushed out. I didn't have to be pushed out after that, I ran. 

I didn't know where I was running, I was running away from the sadness, away from the heartbreak, away from Lily. I didn't even know where I was running, I just had to get away very quickly. I ran until I felt as if I had reached my destination, Lily's house. I ran into the house which had been observed by police earlier that day. I ran up the stairs into Lily's bedroom slamming the door behind me. I frantically looked around not quite sure of what I was looking for. But my hands got to a conclusion before my brain did. I found the ring and the necklace that I bought Lily. I took them in my hands fiddling round with them in my fingers. I dropped to the floor, exhausted from my previous exorsions. My hands eventually fell to the ground in defeat as the ring rolled across the floor knocking into the door. My eyes slowly closed as her name left my lips,

"Lily..."

LILY POV

I was falling. Slowly, slowly falling into nothing. I called out Louis name, 

"LOUIS! LOUIS HELP ME!" 

but he didn't come to my aid, nobody did. I just kept falling into the nothing wailing a screaming, trying to refuse defeat. I slowly felt myself slipping out of reality into the darkness that was death but I refused to give up. I fought it. I felt as if I was being sliced open, my leg stung with pain as my head spun. 

I finally landed somewhere with a loud oomph. There were mirrors, many many mirrors. I looked around at them in terror, staring at my battered body and damaged face. I looked round at the many mirrors observing myself, quickly turning around to find myself being dissappointed by my own nasty reflection. But then I heard a familar voice whisper my name,

"Lily."

Louis. I ran towards the noise bumping into a mirror. In the mirror I saw Louis's face. It was sad, sunken and he was calling out my name. I clawed at the mirror, desperate to return to reality, screaming his name again and again. 

"Louis I love you!" I sobbed "I'm here!" 

He kept saying my name again and again, softly. The image distorted and I saw a young boy, a young boy with brown swept hair. I knew who it was, it was Louis. I was in his house, why was he so young? I heard myself talk, how strange. I then realized that this was a memory, was I seeing the insides of my own mind? 

Memories replayed through the mirrors, my happy laughter ringing throughout the room. I sunk to the floor with my hand against the mirror staining it with blood. 

LOUIS POV

"Louis!"

she called out to me, her desperate voice made my heart race as I looked around in the darkness. That's when I started to fall, tumbling through the air. 

"Help me!" 

She called, I saw her now. She was falling, but there was something different about her, she wasn't the same as she was before. I watched her fall as she continued to call out my name with pleas of help. 

"Louis! Save me!"

I stretched out my arm in an attempt to catch her, but I missed her and she continued to fall, faster than me now. 

"LILY NO! I WON'T LET YOU FALL! I'LL SAVE YOU!"

thats when a piercing shriek ran through the air, it was her scream and she was calling out my name. Falling, falling. The screams continued but ended abruptly. It was I who screamed out this time. 

I sat up with a jerk attempting to catch my breath. My eyes focused on a glimmer of gold in the distance. I blinked a couple times before realizing what it was. A ring. I scrambled to my feet grabbing it with my hands before getting a denim coat and running out of the door, towards the hospital. 

Once I got there I burst through it, I ignored the seas of sad people whom were mourning for their lost ones. I could only hope that I would not join them. I ran to her room but was stopped by Liam.

"Out of my way mate," I said tying to get pass him, but he stood in front of me, "You know I love you but I will hurt you to get to her."

"You don't want to go in there..." he mumbled slowly, it wasn't until then when I heard a choked crying sound coming from down the hall. I looked over to find Marley crying into her hands having difficulties breathing. She was crying into Harry's shoulder which continued to muffle her cries. He slowly stroked the back of her hair which was now slowly returning to its natural brown state. 

Why was she so sad? What happened? It then clicked in my head, my eyes widened as I repeated my sentence.

"Out of my way mate. Go tend to your girlfriend, don't protect mine." 

"Cherie is handeling it very well, she's not here at the moment, she said she was getting something."

"Then go buy her a bagel, maybe she will be hungry." I spat once again trying to push my way past him. Thats when two girls came running into the room. I noticed them from earlier days, when Lily was showing me her new friends. Lilac and Haley.

"We came as soon as we heard the bad news," the blonde one said, this was Haley but she looked different from before her hair was blonde and not orange.

"Please tell me we came in time," the one with dark hair said, Lilac. 

Cherie came trailing in behind them with her arms wrapped around her body. Her eyes were tear-stained, even strong Cherie couldn't handle whatever was waiting for me in this room.

"Come in time?" I asked,

"We heard that she was about to die?" Lilac said with a questioning tone to her voice, I took one look at Liam before shoving the door open to find Lily lying on the bed. I didn't hear the beeping noise anymore. 

"No," I cried running towards her, "No!"

Once I reached the bed I tried everything that I could. Including CPR. I even tried to kiss her awake in desperation, pressing my lips against her stone cold ones. But she remained motionless, cold. 

"L-l-lily no..." I cried, "No. No. This can't be it. No! Don't leave me Lily!"

Tears streamed down my cheeks now as I continued to kiss her, something so stupid was what I was left to. Desperate acts of affection. 

"Lily! I love you! Please don't leave me here... Please don't leave me here."

I heard more screams coming from the doorway, I heard Marley most prominently but I heard two other cries as well, I assumed that it was Haley and Lilac. 

"I'm so sorry Lily, before you slip out of this world please just know that I'm so sorry and that I love you so much. Please know that you are everything to me. Please know that you are the most beautiful thing that I have ever had the pleasure of laying my eyes on. Please know that I am in love with everything about you. I love your eyes. I love your smile. I love your small dimples. I love how you can never take a compliment. I love how your cheeks burn red every time you get kissed. I love how you are so quick to forgive. I love you so so so much don't leave me please."

I looked to the heart monitor hoping to hear the familiar beep but it was replaced by silence. 

"No," I breathed, "No." 

My head fell onto the bed in defeat, the covers soaking up my tears. I heard the cries stop and the door close. I was thankful that they were giving me my privacy. I held her hand tight not daring to let go. I started playing with her fingers when I reached into my pocket and pulled out the ring that I bought her. I took my head away from the bed to look at it in my fingers. I sniffled a little bit, and wiped my eyes before shakily taking her hand and placing the ring upon it. 

I looked at her, my eyes puffy and red from all the crying I had been doing. She remained still. I wiped my eyes once again before lying a soft kiss on her hand and standing up. I couldn't take it anymore, I had to leave. I slowly walked towards the door knowing that this would be the last time that I saw her, knowing that I couldn't even bear to see her in this state anymore. But that was when I heard

Beep.

---

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