Back For You

They say friendship lasts forever. Louis Tomlinson and Lillian Brie thought that this statement was completely true. But when one "yes" from Simon Cowell changes their fate together they need to find their way back together. After years of solitude, Louis comes back to Doncaster for a visit. Just as he promised. Because when two people are meant to be, they will always find their way back.


32. Chapter 32 - Smile

A/N: Ok guys, I'm sorry for all you lovely Harley fans but I decided to ditch their dinner, the subject will be touched on but I know what you guys want to here it goes, here's some LOUIAN! Oh, and I was reading through the whole story as a pick me up (you guys are so awesome, I have the best readers) and I just realized what I carrot I was at the beginning of this haha.



I woke up with wet cheeks. I had spent the rest of the day speaking with Siobhan, learning about her life, her interests. The subject of Louis wasn't touched on again, I'm not quite sure if it was because it was too painful or maybe simply because it was too difficult and conflicting to talk about but it wasn't touched on again. 

Just as expected, he wasn't there when I got back home. Left on a note on the table telling me that he was living with his family for a couple days, clearing his head. After that I went in my bed crying, cursing myself for kissing Louis. Slut? Whore? I was almost sure that if I logged onto twitter, something that I hadn't properly used for two years, words like this would be clogging my News Feed.

A part of me didn't care, the hate never really got to me. But as I lay there in my bed, drying my cheeks with my sleeves I realized that the only reason I got through all of that is because I always had someone there. And that someone was usually Lou. But no, I wasn't ready to forgive him yet. I sat up in my bed, attempting to steady my breathing in order not to hyperventilate madly. 

I glanced over at my clock, feeling thankful that it was Saturday and that I didn't have work to get too. 10:00. I squinted my eyes, rubbing my temples trying to make sense of what was happening in my life currently. What was happening in my life currently? Thats when my phone went off five times, alerting me that I got a text. I groggily reached over to it, turning it on.

From: Marls-y Sent: 7:00am

I missed dinner with Harry last night. He won't stop calling me. Need you with me. Please. Marls xox

I rubbed the sleeping dust out of my eyes responding to the message,

Don't give in Marley. Stay strong. Can't come over now but I love you. Lily x

I clicked send, blinking a couple times when I read the message through. Lily? Did I just call myself Lily? I decided to blame it on myself being tired as I read through my other four text messages, all from Siobhan.

From: Siobhan Ur Fav ;) Sent: 9:30am

Lou seems really depressed, did you text him or something? He's just sitting in the corner with a stern look on his face staring at his phone. Eeemmooo - Sio x

From: Siobhan Ur Fav ;) Sent: 9:36am

omg, I don't know whats happening with you but please call me now. Need to tell you something, can't risk texting

From: Siobhan Ur Fav ;) Sent: 9:49am

He has this crazy idea, can't say it over text. Call me. I can convince him, you have to try.

From Siobhan Ur Fav ;) Sent: 9:53


My eyes widened at her last message as I heard a loud knock on my door. I ran out of my bed, through the corridor and straight to the door. I peered through the eyehole to only be greeted by darkness. If Louis did indeed come to my house he had covered up the keyhole. Did he honestly think that if I knew it was him I couldn't open the door. I pressed my ear against the door and heard him muttering things that I couldn't quite make out. 

I jumped back slightly when he banged on the door again, still not speaking. Thats when I heard another person enter the situation, Siobhan.

"Lou, this is so stupid! What are you hoping to achieve?" she sneered, I heard him groan and had to bite the inside of my mouth to stop myself from laughing knowing that I would give away that I was here,

"I don't care Siobhan!" he shouted back, stepping away from the eyehole allowing me to peer through at them. Siobhan was looking beautiful as always wearing her trademark, floor-length skirt with a tight tanktop and hat. Louis, on the the other hand wore a pair of denim jeans, a fitting white shirt and denim jacket. I bit my lip as I observed the tight fabric. 

"No," I practically breathed out, "You can't think like that. You want to get back with Daniel. Daniel. Daniel. You love Daniel." 

"I don't care that you don't care!" she spat grabbing his wrist, "We're going, now."

"But I need to tell her something!" he said yanking his hand out of her wrist, "I need to ask her something!"

"Ask her what?" she hissed grabbing his wrist again, "Don't tell me you're going to ask her what you asked me in the cafe?"

"Why can't I?" he said once again yanking his hand away, "Do you have an issue with that?"

"No!" she said crossing her arms across her chest, "But she might!"

"Siobhan just listen!" he exclaimed grabbing her shoulders, "I've got this whole situation planned out!"

"Oh?" she chuckled, "Louis, were you reading through tumblr again? Looking at fanfics about yourself?"

He gulped as he shook his head, obviously lying, "No! I mean, why would I do that?"

"Oh my gosh!" she exclaimed jumping up and down, "You are such a loser you know? Reading through fanfics for gestures to use with Lily! Ugh, just give up while you can!"

"Hey!" he said, "I thought you said you shipped Lily and I together,"

"Well yeah," she said her voice shrinking, "But I mean, Daniel brought home smores every Friday night. Always sent her texts throughout the day telling her how much he loved her. Filled her office with flowers. Watched Gossip Girl with her. Wrote little notes on pieces of paper and slipped it in her back pocket. Carried her round the apartment after large functions where she had to wear heels. Not to mention that every morning they meet up at a cafe to talk about their day. And he's known her for like what? A year? You've known her for how long? 15, 16 years?"

"Twenty years..." he squeaked out, I had a sharp intake of breath, had it really been twenty years? Had we really known each other for twenty whole years. Twenty whole years of my life? That was more than half of my life. I gulped but jumped slightly when Siobhan stared laughing,

"HAH! Twenty years! And the most romantic thing you ever did for her was get her bluebells. Which he does as well! God! I would go with Daniel," there was some muttering before Siobhan continued speaking, "No stupid. Of course she's not going to ditch you for Daniel." more silence and quiet mumbling prevailed. "Hah! I'm sorry I can't agree there. I reckon he's pretty fit!" more silence and mumbling, "Lou that isn't fair, you know why I'm not dating guys at the moment. No, No its fine. Just, ugh stop trying to hug me you smell. I'm just saying, I hope you're not planning something extraneous and over dramatic because she didn't love you for the things you did but the thing that you are. No, I'm not calling you a thing. Lou. Don't be so sensitive, I'm just. No. Don't knock again! She's probably not even at home. Hey! Its been five years since you guys have properly caught up."

It frustrated me only being able to hear one side of the conversation as I pressed my ear closer to the door attempting to hear Louis who was speaking very quietly now. 

"Louis. Lets just leave, c'mon you know I'm right. Fine we can go to Central Park and have icecream. No we're not doing that. Ugh don't worry, the paps will be there. No, I'm sure noone has picked up on that. C'mon lets go!"

"No!" I shouted flinging the door open not wanting him to leave, "I mean, uh. No! Sorry I heard muffling and thought you were... salesmen."

"Salesmen?" Louis chuckled, 

"Yeah! Its New York, there are creepy salesmen round the place."

"You live a couple blocks down from Central Park and there are creepy salesmen?" Louis asked, I looked to Siobhan with a pleading look, she facepalmed herself causing me to roll my eyes, 

"Why did you come?" I groaned as Siobhan continued to facepalm herself, "I'm sort of waiting for an important call."

"From who?" Louis asked, walking closer to me, leaning against the door frame. I took a large step backwards as he chuckled at the floor knowing that he was making me uncomfortable, "Is it from Danny Small- I mean, Daniel?"

"What's it to you?" I spat in an attempt to look tough, judging by the look on his face I was dreadfully failing, 

"Could I come in?" he said flicking his head up, gesturing to inside of my apartment. I opened my mouth as if to say something, inhaling deeply but when I tried to respond I found myself unable. 

"Why don't you just stay in the hallway?" I chuckled, "Us, alone, inside this apartment, alone. Us. I just, I'm not a fan of what happened in central park."

"Something happened in Central Park?" Siobhan said, suddenly taking an interest in our conversation, "I didn't hear about this! Lou! Why did you tell me? And you! Lily, you have no excuse we were totally having a D&M yesterday!"

"Wait-" Louis interrupted earning him a stare from Siobhan, "Sio here can call you Lily but I can't?" 

"Yeah so?" I said feigning disinterest when in actuality I knew how much this would piss him off, "She hasn't broken any of my friends hearts or my heart."

"God," he spat, "For a minute there I thought I got Lily back, just then when you were making up your bullshit salesmen story and back then in Central Par-"

"What happened in Central Park!" Siobhan exclaimed, cutting Louis off, "Did you guys like get at each other behind the bushes or something?"

"Ew," I said by brows furrowing together, "We kissed, thats all."

"I think it was more than just a kiss," Louis replied cocking his eyebrow at me, "If you know what I mean,"

"No Lewis," I said, obviously pissing him off, "I don't know what you meant,"

He tilted his head and raised his eyebrows almost as if he was challenging me, telling me he could play the game as well as I did. I widened my eyes as if to prod him along,

"Well," he began, "The little guy down there knows what I'm talking about,"

My mouth dropped in shock as Siobhan broke out into fits of laughter, leaning against a wall for support. I saw the smug little look and slammed the door shut after screaming out,


"So you do know what I'm talking about!"


"Ow!" I heard him shout from the other side of the door, "My nose! God Siobhan do shut up will you... It's not that funny!... Ok I guess it is a little funny... No I'm not giving up now!... Look can we not discuss this, just leave me alone will you?... No! Siobhan, I'm not saying that... No, thats humiliating, traumatising in fact... Yes I do have a large vocabulary... No I wasn't make a penis reference!... Ugh! You'll leave me alone?... Fine I'll say it... Ugh do I really have to?... Fine. I'm Louis William Tomlinson and I... Shut up I'm getting there!... Fine fine! I'm Louis William Tomlinson and I read fanfictions on tumblr... Don't be so immature... You promised you would leave me alone!... Good, thankyou leave now! Bye! Yeah fine, I'll text you or something,"

I heard Siobhan's laughter faint, but my laughter soon replaced it. I was now laughing so hard that I needed to use the wall for support, 

"I can hear you y'know!" I heard him yell causing my laughter to grow, "Ah fuck, my nose... Shit, is that blood? Crap thats blood. At least let me in for a tissue,"

I rolled my eyes before slowly easing my door open, I was shocked when my door flung open as Louis ran inside, frantically looking round for my bathroom. 

"Where is something in this freaking apartment!" he yelled running down the hallway that led to the bedrooms and bathrooms, "Where is it! Nope not there, not there, FOUND IT!"

I rolled my eyes, walking into the bathroom where he was blowing his nose out into a tissue over the sink while sticking some wet paper towels up his nose.

"What are you doing?" I chuckled as he blew his nose again, blood soaking the tissue, "Trying to kill yourself?"

"I'm getting rid of all the blood what does it look like I'm doing?" he nasally said as he removed some more blood soaked tissues from his nose. I watched more and more tissues go into the bin until I was finally done watching him suffer, 

"Ok here let me help," I said, he dropped all of his tissues into the bin sitting on the lid of the toilet, I chuckled at him as he waited for me, I grabbed one of the few tissues he left, folding it over a couple times and pinching his nose shut with the tissue over his nostrils, "Tilt your head back a little bit k?"

He obliged tilting his head back, I felt him tense up underneath my grip and panicked, 

"Ugh! Crap did I hurt you?"

"Can't breathe," he choked out, "Can't breathe..."

"Breathe through your mouth you idiot," I chuckled, he let out a loud gasp causing blood to come out of his nose, 

It was until then when I realized how close Louis and I were. My hand was pressed against the back of his head, making sure that he didn't move and my face hovered over his so that I could keep an eye on the blood coming out of his nose. He looked up to me, his eyes slightly glassy from crying over the bloody nose, I couldn't help but smile at his puppy-dog like expression,

"Are you crying?" I cooed, "Aw! Poor little Louis!"

"I'm not crying," he mumbled, whimpering a bit as he tried to move away, "I just got something in my eye..."

"What?" I chuckled, "A branch?"

He pouted at me as I applied more pressure to his noise causing him to wince, me to chuckle. That's when he closed his eyes, slowly moving his face closer to mine. I instantly leaned back, laughing again.

"Is that your big move?" I chuckled, "Crying? Aw! I thought you were better than that!"

"Ugh," he groaned sitting up and taking the tissue from my hand, "Make me some tea women,"


"You've been getting better," he said taking a sip of his tea, his eyes shooting open since it was still hot,

"Been getting better?" I asked, "Was I sick?"  

He looked down to the floor, just for a second, before looking up again and placing his hand on my cheek, stroking his thumb back and forth, "Unlike the last time we were together, I can do this now without you flinching. Did you get therapy?"

"Mm hm," I sighed leaning into his hand feeling oddly nostalgic. "The memories, they're still there I just... I've just gotten better at pushing them away I guess."

"It makes me happy y'know?" he chuckled continuing to stroke my cheek with his thumb, "Knowing that I can still make your cheeks heat up, knowing that I can still make you blush."

"You shouldn't," I said, stopping as I struggled for words as I pushed his hand away, turning around so that my back was too him "You shouldn't be... be making me blush. Its so wrong,"

"Hey," he cooed turning me round and grabbing my face in his hands, "Hey. Even though this, us, you and me, seems so wrong I'm not letting you chance this into something that its not. Because this is, true love and once you knew that. Because I always have loved you. I've never felt like anybody like this before. And I know you've never felt for Derek or Daniel like you feel for me. Because you can't tell me that this," he moved my head down and placed his lips upon my forehead, lingering them there for awhile before pulling back, "Doesn't feel right or that this," he leaned my head to the side placing a long kiss to my cheek,"Doesn't feel right either. And this," he said leaning in so that he was just hovering over my lips, daring me to lean in, daring me to make the first move, I could feel his hot breath against my lips and hear my own heartbeat in my ears, but I remained still. I caught a glimpse of his face dropping when I moved my head away, 

"I-I'm sorry..." I muttered as I turned my back to him, 

"It's fine," he breathily said, I heard him stand up as his voice got further away, "Just call me ok? You know my number yeah?" 

I turned around plastering a smile on my face and chuckling in an attempt to lighten the mood,

"You going just now? I was just about to poison the tea!" 

He turned around, slightly upturning the corners of his mouth before raising a single hand in a half-attempted wave, "Don't worry Lily, I'm sure we'll see each other soon."

I returned his smile with a nod of my head as he slowly reached the door handle, almost as if he wanted me to say something. Just like I always did, I obliged, adding in with a slight chuckle,

"Oh and Lou!" he spun around his eyes wide as he flashed a cheeky smile my way, "It's Ann,"

"For now!" he responded now yanking the door open and running out of the room, I chuckled down at the floor. He was such an idiot, when the door burst open again I slightly jumped, but when I saw that it was Louis my face softened, "Oh and Ann," he said putting extra emphasis on 'Ann' "Tell Lily that whenever she's read to come back, I want to tell her something. Thanks."

He then ran out of the door, leaving me alone in my large apartment. I took a deep breath, realizing that I was pretty alone. But then I wasn't sure of something, why was I letting him win? He had only been here for three days or something close to that and he had already ruined an entire photoshoot for me and an interview. Was he right? Was it better for us to be apart? Should I even be having these thoughts? I shook my head knowing that I shouldn't be, that I shouldn't be fighting against Lou... Louis. But instead fighting for Daniel. But when I saw a piece of paper on the table reading:

Lily, Meet me at Central Park at 10:00pm where we... y'know. Maybe ditch Ann this time ;) x You know who this is from

I couldn't help but smile.


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