Lucky Niall

READ THIS MOVELLA!!!!!!!!!!
That got your attention didn't it?
Hey. This is a sequel to THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE. I got a fair few requests for more so I decided today that I would make a sequel.
Now, GOSSIP FOR YOU! Turns out, the poor unfortunate in the first movella, whom I never named, is called Niall. And yes, I do realise that that's my name. And just so you know, he is not based on me. Well, loosely based. I'm not as clumsy though. And I'm not conceited either. I don't use my name for all my characters. I don't really know why I picked my own name to be honest. Whatever, I'm in a weird mood.
Anyroad, not only is Niall unlucky the odd day, he's unlucky every day. But then, his granda gives him a watch and something very strange begins to happen . . . See if you can spot it. ;)

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3. Granda's Lucky Watch

The next day, after I recovered from the incident. I went to my granny and granda's house. I loved going to my grandparent's house. I always seemed to get hurt when I was there though. Weird, right? I literally fell in the door, and limped into the sitting room to sit down on the couch beside my granda, who always seemed to be watching TV. And I mean, always. Even at mass, he would bring a wee portable telly with him and watch it with headphones in his ears. I don't think anyone would notice either. He would be watching 24 Hours in A&E and, seeing someone's bloodied crushed leg, he would shout "Jesus Christ!" Even then, nobody would notice. I think they thought he was just very enthusiastic about going to mass.

Anyway, I sat beside him and saw that he was watching Nigella Lawson, a personal favourite of his. Not the show, just her basically. One time, he was watching her and I nearly died when I saw his trousers tented at the crotch, if you get what I mean. I didn't think he had it in him, to be honest. I mean, he was 76. But then again, he was wearing jeans at the time so that would have explained it. Ahh, jeans. Faking boners since 1892.

Anyway, again. I sat beside him and he must have noticed that I looked depressed because, without taking his eyes off the TV screen, he suddenly asked;

"What's wrong? Are you on your period or something?"

"What?!" I exclaimed. I mean, I know I was holding onto my balls when I sat down but still. That was a bit extreme. "No, Granda, I'm a fella."

"Oh right." He answered, not really caring at all, "Sorry, I just get you and your sister mixed up sometimes."

"How?" I asked, slightly offended. He was kind of senile though so it didn't really matter whether he thought I was a girl or not. As a response, he did his impression of a horse sneezing** and simply said;

"Just that hippie hairstyle of yours. I wouldn't worry about it though, I used to be gay aswell."

Lovely, I thought to myself, Not only does he think I'm gay but now I'm finding out some deep secrets that would probably scar me for life.

"Granda." I said as slowly and clearly as possible, "We've been through this before. I'm not gay and I don't want to know about your wartime shenanigans in the the bunker."

"We had the best crack." He said smiling, not listening to me in the slightest, "I remember we used to play hide the sausage."

"Oh God! Granny!" I shouted, "Granda's reminiscing about the war again!"

"Oh shit!" Came the voice of my granny from upstairs, "Hold on, I'll be down in a minute! Whatever you do, don't touch him! We don't need him more aroused than he is already!"

I literally cringed, thinking of the events of the last five minutes. I felt like I had just eaten cotton wool.

 

When the time finally came for me to go, my granny called me into the kitchen and gave me a small box.

"It's your granda's watch." She said gently, "That's what got him through the war. I gave it to him the day he was set to depart."

"Oh my God. Thank you." I said politely. I opened the box and saw the coolest looking watch ever. It was all polished silver and had a small, azure blue face.

I immediately put it on and suddenly felt very different. Like there was nothing in the world I couldn't do. I sauntered out the door, without falling, and sprinted home. Something I wouldn't usually do for fear of falling. But now it was different. I found a confidence burning inside me. Maybe it was my asthma from the running but I didn't think so. I immediately fell in love with the watch and would never take it off for as long as I lived.

 

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** If you don't know what I mean by this, Just look it up on Youtube. Just follow this link.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVqCJm7lIPE

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