One Step Closer

So there she is. Beautiful. Magnificent. Her name is Isabella, her story is written with hope and her life is lived to the fullest. But can she decide what she really wants?

You should be warned that this is not a regular love story. This is a story about love, between two people who tried to make things right.

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10. Stuck in Between

The next morning i woke up next to harry. He was in only his shirt and he looked so peaceful and his arms were loosely wrapped around my waist. I tried to get up but he frowned. He held me tight and mumbled "please stay" in a  really hoarse voice as he nuzzled his face in my neck. I laughed.

"You have to go back to your room before Zayn finds out you didnt sleep there last night." i said and yawned. My eyes met his. "Sorry i got lost in your eyes what were you saying?" What was he doing? We werent lovers, we were some kind of friends with benefits without the friends part. I quickly jumped off the bed.

"You need to go." I said while i went to the bathroom. "History repeating itself" i mumbled, remembering the night we met.

I didnt know why i reacted that way, but i was sure that if i stayed in the room a little longer id probably do something id regret. Thats why i ran off.   I brushed my teeth and fixed my hair in a messy bun. I walked back to my room.

His spot was now taken by Lou. "Morning love." he said with a big smile on his face. "Goodmorning sunshine." I walked towards the closet , not sure of what to wear. "So tell me, what do you think about Harry?" he said as he rested his body on my bed.

The same bed Harry was lying a few moments ago. If he only knew. God, i had to keep Harry out of my mind. "He is a nice lad." i confessed and Lou chuckled." He is extremely good with girls. I know he can be persuasive, the dimples, the accent…He can win you in a second, with those eyes, but he can also break you with a simply look." he said searching for my reaction. But i tried to stay calm. "Charming lad though." he continued.

"You make everything so dramatic." i finally said and he laughed "You dont understand girl, he is wild. He is like fire, if you catch him, you will get burnt." He laughed once again. "You are so lame." i laughed and threw him a piece of clothing i found. "But you still love me." he said proudly. "I sure do, you are my best friend you piece of shit. And we will be best friends forever." I lied next to him. "How do you know?" he said confused. "Because we are too lazy to find new friends?"i pointed. "Fair enough." he tickled me and I burst into laughter.  

"See you downstairs." he said walking out of the room and closing the door carefully.  I hated that i had to lie to him. I hated that. Maybe i should call it off with Harry, at least i wouldnt have to live with so much guilt. But on the other hand, he really made me happy. In a different way. I couldnt be sad around him, because it seemed that with his smile he could take all my pain away.

NO! I shouldnt feel that way. I shouldnt let him come close to me. I was building up my walls for years. I wouldnt let some total strange walk into my life and crash them. I wore a pair of skinny jeans and a black hoodie. As i walked out of the room i bumped into Zayn. "Morning" I said with a smile. "Goodmorning love." He said while closing his bedroom door behind him. I caught a glimpse of Harry undressing.

Oh boy. "How are you this fine day?" his voice interrupted my thoughts. "Im actually pretty good." i said climbing down the stairs with Zayn behind me. "Goodmorning" we alll said in sync as we walked in the kitchen. "Pancakes for breakfast." Niall screamed. "Oh i love pancakes." I confessed while taking my seat between Ash and Liam.

Harry came downstairs a few seconds later and managed to take the seat opposite me. I couldnt keep my eyes off him. He was talking to everyone feeling happy, laughing at their jokes like he didnt feel any guilt about what we were doing behind our friends backs. And i felt alone, like i was the only one suffering from what we were doing. Maybe this was my call, to end it all right now. To not take it any further with him, because things might get very complicated. But how could I?

My thoughts stopped immediately when he looked at me. His eyes starring into mine, like he could actually read my mind. I looked away,but i couldnt resist myself. I looked back at him, only to find out he hadnt moved his eyes off me. I kept our eye contact, i didnt want to be the one who breaks it this time, but my phone bumped. I took it out of my pocket and looked at the text.

It was from Harry. 'Not gonna lie, im undressing you in my head right now.' I blushed and hid a laugh. I looked at him over my phone and bit my lip, he had a half smirk on his face. It was game on. I lift my foot and touched his leg, i laughed at his shocked face expression. I turned my head to pretend i was talking to Ash and moved my foot a little further up.

With the corner of my eye i could Harry trying to manage his emotions and feelings. God i had him for good. I moved my foot even further right down his belt and tickled the spot with my fingers.  He jumped off his seat and run upstairs. I giggled and Lou looked at me angrily. I knew i was in trouble but it was worth it. Just Harry's expression was priceless.

I finished my pancake and Zayn suggested we should go for a walk outside. It was a fine day today. It was a bit chilly but bearable. It wasnt raining which was nice, and you could actually admire the view around you in silence. "Are you ok Bella?" Zayn finally asked me as we both sat near the river.I didnt answer. I didnt know how to answer at this question anymore. Was i ok?

 "Ive been acting like im okay, but im not." I finally said. "Did you talk to your dad?" "Are you kidding me? He is going to kill me if he finds out i broke up with James." I took a rock in my hand and start playing with it. " I think you deserve to be happy Bella, and you deserve someone who gives a shit." "Its just that- im really afraid to feel happy , because it never lasts." I sighed "Of course, lets dont forget that i have a tendency to fall in love with the wrong people." i continued and threw my rock in the river.

A small wave appeared when my rock hit the water. He chuckled, "I trust you. You are going to find someone who deserves a girl like you." I smiled at him and watched him slowly getting up. " Are you coming inside, its time to pack our stuff." He pointed. "In a little while."

I watched him walking in the house. I looked around me and observed the scenery. It was a beautiful place to sit and think and clear your mind. I liked it here.  

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