Love Triangle

In middle school Emily's penn-pals name is Harry Styles. She moves to Los Angeles from Chicago. Will her bestfriend in Los Angeles soon become family? She moves to Holmes Chapel and auditions for XFactor. What will happen on her journey? Perhaps a Love Triangle or new additions to the family.

**NOTE** EMILY'S POV MOST OF THE STORY

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35. 35. "If You Cant Hang Then, There's The Door Baby"

its been almost a month since liams birthday now, and doniya is still here. i dont mind at all though. i love having her here. but the think is, we havent really been together. ive been too busy writing music and going to meetings with simon. but today was going to be a catch up day with doniya.  we were just going to walk all around London to talk about things. currently, i was in the kitchen. i woke up really early today. its weird. i didnt really sleep last night, i didnt end up falling asleep until 3am and right now its 8:15. i honestly dont know whats up with me. why am i all of the sudden thinking about harry? it might just be because we actually talked last night, we havent really talked at all.  the last time me and harry talked was on liams birthday. since that night, we havent spoken a word to each other. but he was still on my mind, every single night. i walked over to the cabinet to get out the cereal box, a bowl and a spoon, then i made my way over to the fridge to get the milk.  everything is so different here, in england. first, the fridge that this flat has is tiny. this would be considered a mini fridge in America, and the carton of milk here is odd-looking. i guess i have to get used to this, although i dont think that i can ever get used to having a small refrigerator  im glad my mom and andrew had ours shipped overseas. so we have a normal fridge. well at least to us. when anne first saw it, she stood there with her mouth wide open. she couldnt believe how huge it was. i had gotten confused, but then they explained how the fridges here are smaller.  "hey" a husky deep voice said, standing at the entrance of the kitchen. guys morning voices are so sexy, honestly. i looked up and saw harry leaned on the door frame. "hey" i simply said back. "why are you up so early?" i shrugged my shoulders, "i couldnt sleep last night and i woke up early" "how come?" "i dont know, i miss my dad, i miss my mom and andrew, i miss nick, i miss gemma, i miss all the guys back home. and something was on my mind, but its confusing me. a lot." "how do you miss nick and gemma? they live here." "i know, but i guess it just seems like a lost a bestfriend and a really good friend. nick was the one that was three for me trough the bad times and the good times back in the states, we told each other everything. he knows me inside and out, and i know him the same, well, i guess we used to. i tell him things i would never tell anyone else. and gemma, well gemma is gemma, we weren't so close and we didnt start off so good, but in the end we got close and i dont know, i guess it just feels like im getting distant from everyone, especially the guys back home." "why dont you just call the guys, but more importantly your dad." 'more importantly your dad' that hit me, that hit me hard.  i squeezed my eyes shut, so i could try to hold back the tears that were about to fall. one managed to fall down my cheek, "i wish it was that easy harry." "what?" "my dad." i chocked out the word 'dad'. "oh, why?" now i have to tell him. i never really told anyone, the only person i told ever, was kyle and nick. i didnt even tell vicky. i dont know why, but i dont trust girls as much as i trust guys. maybe its because guys dont judge you. guys were the only people who were by my side through everything  they never judged me. they protected me. i was the little sister to all the guys. they were like a family to me. "harry, i dont have a dad." i managed to keep my tears in. he didnt respond. "he died when i was younger." with that i was out full out crying. he picked my up bridal style and walked over to the couch, he sat me on his lap and didnt say anything. that was a cue to continue. "when ever it was La Copa Mundial, or the World Cup, my dad would go over to his friends house......" i told him everything. this is the third time that i cried the most in my life. harry didnt say anything when i finished, which i appreciated, i would of cried even harder if he did. he was rubbing circles on my back he hugged my tight. "emily?! emily! whats wrong?" there stood shirtless nick in front on me and harry. "with what?" i was back in my nervous voice now, "why were you crying? are you okay? whats wrong?" "dad." his facial expression immediately changed. he gave me a small smile, he opened his arms, i got off harry and gave him a huge hug. "em, are you busy today?" harry asked, standing up from the couch, "yeah, im going to be with doniya all day, why?" "tomorrow?" "no, i was gonna stay in." "can we have a catch up day?" he asked "sure" that was all he had to hear, he walked up the stairs with a huge smile on his face. i was still in the bone crushing hug with nick. "nick?" "hmmm?" i felt  his chest vibrate. "i miss you" he pulled me back so we were facing each other, "what do you mean?" he had a confused face, "we just never talk anymore. we were bestfriends back home, i would tell you everything, and so would you. i even think you know me better then i know myself.  i miss the guys, i miss home." "we will always be bestfriends okay? we do need to talk more though, we aren't as close. and this is home." we both stayed silent for a while and he spoke up, "we have to go visit your dad." i nodded my head, "i miss him nick. a lot." "you have my dad" joked trying to lighten up the atmosphere, "its not the same." i responded in a voice just above a whisper, "were you going to eat? the milk and cereal are still out." i nodded my head, "im not hungry anymore." i grabbed the cereal box and milk and put them away. "you didnt sleep last night did you?" i shook my head, "why?" "something was on my mind, and nick, its confusing. i dont know why, i mean, uh i dont know how to say it." he understands. this is how we were back home, then he would sleep over my house or i would sleep over his and we would lay done on the bed at night just talking it out. "sleep with me tonight, ill tell gemma to sleep with harry." i nodded my head, "she can sleep in my old room, doniya is leaving today, unless she wants to sleep with harry." he nodded his head, "ill tell her later" i nodded my head, "im gonna go get ready" i heard nick go to the living room and turn on the tv. i walked up the stairs and opened the door to zayns room. he was sitting on the edge of the bed, scrolling through his phone.  "your up early" "i heard you crying, why?" i shook my head, "its not easy to talk about." his eyes suddenly were filled up with anger.  "how can you tell harry but not me?" he was mad.  "its not an easy subject for me zayn." i breathed out and said just loud enough for him to hear.  why was he so mad? he has never gotten mad at me before and i dont know what to expect.  "what the hell is so hard about it?!" "zayn.." i let out a sigh, a single tear fell out of my eye. thinking about it. thinking about my dad. my dad.  hes my dad. i have his blood. hes gone. forever. im never going to see him again.  "do you not trust me or some shit? what the fuck is so damn hard? you still fucking love harry dont you? i fucking knew it. i just knew it." he was full out yelling now. and loud. his vain in his neck was visible. very visible. it looked as if it were going to pop. i was full out crying, again, for the second time in one day, about 10 minutes apart to. "why the hell did i even ask you out?" wow. that hurt. that hurt real bad. it felt like someone took a knife and cut my heart in half. "i bet you two even fucked behind my back." now hes accusing me of cheating? what a bastard. "fuck you zayn! fuck you!" i screamed as loud as i could. im pretty sure everyone heard, or i woke everyone up. it was a saturday and it was about 10, we always sleep in on weekends. right now, i was crying so much that i couldnt feel the tears coming out of my eyes.  the door literally slammed so hard against the wall that it closed again and reopened. doniya came in. "what hell is happening?" she looks confused, mad, and tired. i tried to speak,  but i couldnt. no words came out. harry came in a right as i was going to try to speak again. i ran to him and hugged him as tight as i could. i could feel zayns eyes on my every move. "zayn, what the hell did you do to her?" doniya sounded pissed as hell and she looked beyond mad. i dont even think mad is the right word. zayn didnt respond, his stare felt like he was burning s whole through my body. "Zayn!" doniya yelled as loud as she could. i walked out of the room and pulled harry with me, i walked us into his room and locked the door. e sat on the bed and i sat on top of him, hugging him as hard as i can and crying into his chest. i can hear doniya yelling things at zayn, shes really mad at him. im calmed down now. im not crying anymore, even though its like fifteen minutes later.  "what happened?"  i told him everything that happened. i told him how he said that he thinks that me and harry are fucking behind his back, that he doesnt know why he asked me out, how he thinks i dont trust him. everything. we've been sitting, well laying down in silence for about half an hour now. we laid dawn a while ago, but i was still holding on to him and he was holding on to me. and lets just say that were really close. doniya wasnt yelling at zayn anymore. "i miss you em." harry randomly said, breaking the silence. "i missed you too." i honestly replied back. i really do miss harry. he would always be over my house and well, i just miss him. everything about him. his curly hair, his smile, his eyes, his dimples, his body being close to mine, him. he hugged me tighter.  a sigh left out of harrys mouth, "emily" "hmm?" "i miss us." honestly, i miss us too. i miss seeing him everyday. i miss talking to him. i miss his laugh. i miss us playing xbox or ps3 against each other. us cooking together. us. i dont know whether i should tell him or not. i want to. im still with zayn, but im sure as hell am going to break up with him later. "i miss us too." i said it. i just had to. i miss harry. he misses me. i pulled the covers over us and i snuggled more into his chest. i felt my phone vibrate in the pocket in my hoodie. i grabbed it and checked who was calling me. 'Mom' read the bright screen. i answered and put the phone to my ear. "em!" my mom sounded cheerful. wow i missed her voice. i havent really talked to her. ive been too busy writing music.  "mom!" i said back in a overly  happy voice. "guess what! guess fucking what!" it must be really good. she never curses at me unless shes really mad at me or shes really happy. i couldnt help but to laugh, "what happened?" i asked still laughing. "me andrew and anne went to the ultrasound today" "oh my god! is it a boy or girl?!" "both!" she yelled so loud that i literally pulled the phone away from my ear, "what? both? what do you me- twins! oh my god mom! twins! a boy and a girl?!" "yes! im having twins! a boy and a girl!" "oh my god mom" i was crying, again. but this time they were tears of happiness, not tears of sadness and pain. my phone made a loud beep in my ear which means that someone texted me. "were going to visit soon emily. all of us. as in me andrew, anne and robin. in about a week. but i have to g now, ill talk to you later and ill see you soon, also, you have to sing me one of your songs," "okay, and i will! ill sing you my favorite one" "okay, bye honey, love you!" "bye mom, love you too!"  "so twins?" harry asked right as i hung up. "yes!" i yelled happy as i can be. i just noticed we were both sitting on the bed now. when did this happen? "im gonna tell nick" i jumped off the bed and literally ran into his nicks room. i didnt even knock. i just barged in.  he sitting on the bed on the xbox, and gemma was sitting at the desk on the computer. "nick! guess what!" he jumped, i guess didnt hear me walk in. he must be concentrated on the game. "holy shit you scared me, and what?" i laughed at his statement, "twins!" i yelled. "twins?!" he yelled back, his voice sounded happy, "a boy and a girl!" he looked at me with wide eyes and a wide open mouth, "are you serious?" gemma walked out of the room. "yes! my mom just called! she went with your dad and anne. oh yeah and theyre all coming to visit in a week." i had turned around, about to walk out of the room, "wait, em." his voice changed, now it sounded like his old overprotective voice mixed with a bit of confusion. i turned back around to look at him, "what happened?" "what happened with what?" i know what hes talking about, i just dont wanna talk about it right now. he gave me the you-know-what-im-talking-about face. "a lot" a sigh escaped my lips, he patted the the space next to him on the bed, motioning for me to sit next to him. i walked over to the space and sat down. i leaned my head on his shoulders, "what happened?" he asked once again. "ill tell you at night. we have to talk about a lot of things." gemma walked in with 3 water bottles and handed one to me, one to nick and she kept one, "thanks" i mumbled, she nodded her head, "you okay?" she asked, her face was full of concern. "yeah, im okay." i hugged nick he hugged me back and i walked out of the room and back into harrys. "you have a text" he reminded once i was laying down, hugging his tight. "oh yeah i forgot." he handed me my phone from the nightstand, the text was from doniya, 'we'll go another time, yeah?' the text from doniya read, i replied back with 'yeah'.  "were not going anymore" i said as i put my phone down on the bed, "i figured, do you still want to go out tomorrow?" "yeah" i pulled his shirt up and started drawing random things on his stomach, well abs, with my fingers. he laughed and shook his head, "what? want me to stop?" i asked looking up at him with a smile on my face. he always loved when i did this. he shook his head, "no, i like it." he said with a serious face and voice.  i looked up at him and smiled, "i know." he smiled back. we stayed like this for a while, until he ended up falling asleep. im starting to get hungry, i got out of his grip, i closed the door behind me and walked downstairs to the kitchen. i walked passed the living room and zayn is sitting down on the biggest couch we have. that couch is facing opposite from the kitchen, so i hope he doesnt turn around. i dont want to talk to him. at all. right as i opened the fridge he spoke up, "niall? is that you?" i didnt respond, and i didnt dare turn around just in case  he had turned around. i looked through everything we have in the fridge, "who is it?" he asked again. i still didnt respond  i got out the pizza that was left over from yesterday and a Sunny D juice. i put the pizza in the microwave, i heard zayn shuffling on the couch. either he was moving around on it to lay down, turning around, or getting up. but im not turning around. i heard a pair of feet walking into the kitchen  they pulled out a stool from under the island counter. "emily" he let out a sigh.  i didnt say anything back or turn around. he let out another sigh, "em" i didnt do anything. the microwave beep, i opened it and took out the pizza.  "emily, please talk to me, please im sorry!" i grabbed my Sunny D, i started walking out of the kitchen but i stopped in the door frame, "If you can't hang then, there's the door, baby
If you can't hang then, there's the door, baby
If you can't hang then, there's the door, baby
If you can't hang then, there's the door
 I don't wanna take your precious time
'Cause you're such a pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty face
But you turned into a pretty big waste of my time
I don't wanna take up all your time
'Cause you're such a pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty face
But you turned into a pretty big waste of my time
You're the lowest type
You're the lowest"

i sang a part of my favorite song, If You Cant Hang by Sleeping With Sirens. i turned around to look at him, he was looking down at the table. he really paid attention to the lyrics. good. he looked up he opened his mouth about to say something, but i beat him to it, "im getting my stuff from your room."  with that i walked up the stairs and into harrys room. 

*11 PM THAT SAME DAY*

after i was done eating, i went into zayns room, thank god he wasnt in there, and i got all my stuff and took them back to my old room. when i got everything out, i went back with harry and we talked and laughed nonstop. it was a good feeling. i got a close friend back. not just a friend, a best friend. currently, i am laying down on nicks bed on my phone, nick is changing into his pajama pants. he sleeps shirtless so he didnt put on a shirt. once he was on the bed, he pulled the covers over us. "im so confused nick." "with what?" "remember liams birthday when i talked with harry?" "no?" "oh, well when we both went up stairs, he called me into his room and we talked. and since then hes always been on my mind. and a lot. he would always be first and last thing on my mind everyday. right when i would wake up and when i would go to sleep. but i mean, well at the time, i was with zayn, and i really like him, and i guess i still like harry, but its just, i dont know." "you just kept telling yourself that you dont like harry anymore because of what happened, but you still liked him, or actually still like him," "i loved him, i just dont know if i still do." "see, you loved him, maybe you still do. you have to figure it out by yourself. maybe you two were meant to be. especially how you guys first meet and how eventually you saw each other." "yeah, i guess. tomorrow im hanging out with him, i guess ill see where that takes us." we sat in silence for a bit, "you still never told me what happened.." he reminded me. i told him from the beginning. how at first i told harry, then everything that zayn said. "i didnt know he was like that" nick was shocked  i mean so am i. i too, didnt know that zayn had tat side to him. "me either, and i was the one who had to experience that zayn" i let out an awkward laugh. "in all honestly, i liked you better with harry." "now thinking about it, i think i liked being with harry better, me and zayn didnt really bond. yeah we talked a lot and stuff, but i dont know, it just seemed better with harry." he didnt respond. i placed my head on his bare chest. silence took over the room for a couple of minutes, "em?" i felt his chest go up and down from his breathing, and the beating from his heartbeat.  "yeah?" "you know i had the biggest crush on you back in cali?" i giggles, "all the guys kept telling me but i never believed them" "they werent suppose to tell you!" i didnt respond for a while, "so did i. i thought about telling you a couple of times, but i just never got the balls to. i was scared that i would loose the best thing i had in my life." "i as going to too, and the guys would constantly tell me to. i just never had the balls to tell you. i was going to one day to, but i just didnt know how to say it, and i was scared that you wouldn't feel the same, and that i would loose you." "at least we still have each other right now. and for the rest of our life." "yeah," he proudly said. "i still cant believe that your going to be famous." "i know, me either. its crazy when i think about it. even scary. its gonna suck though, i wont be able to see all of you guys that much. and when the twins are born. but for sure your going to come with me when i go on tour. and when the twins are older, were going to go as a family." "what if its a world tour? will i still be able to go?" "why? would you not want to travel around the world? or what?" i laughed, "no, no i meant like will i still be able to go like to every place?" "yeah, you know what i wanna do?" "what?" he asked, "pay for the wedding. my mom has always talked about having her dream wedding, even when she was still with my dad. it wasnt a big wedding since they just had enough money to pay for it. this is going to be her dream wedding. its going to be amazing. ill have to hire someone to organize it since ill be to busy." "look at you, already planning the future." he laughed, "well yeah, sometimes its nice to think about the future" "i know, but it just seems weird talking and planning the future." "yeah.." i said. we didnt talk for a couple of minutes, we just enjoyed the silence that filled the room. i started laughing, "whats so funny?" he asked, he started to play with my hair. "i sang a song to zayn earlier today when he was trying to talk to me." "how is that funny?" "he really payed attention to the lyrics." "sing it." i sang the part that i sang to zayn. "deep lyrics. what'd he say?" "i left before he could say anything." "you know you have to talk to him" "i know, just i dont want to talk to him so soon.. if you get what im trying to say" "yeah i do." "im going to sing the whole song tomorrow. downstairs with a microphone, im not going to close the door. i want him to hear the whole song, sung by me." "i get you, im getting tired, so night" "me too" he wrapped his arms around my waist and i wrapped my arms around his bare stomach. hes been working out. hes starting to get abs. the whole day, from beginning to end, was replayed in my head. before i knew it, i was asleep. 

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