My life has been filled with promises, promises that couldn't be kept.
Being abused caused me to stay mute..
But can he change that?


1. what to do

Head held low. Arms covering. The room is empty well not really. I'm there but I'm invisible in this house. Well to everyone else I am. I live with my father.. My mother passed just a few years ago. The only place to hide is the corner of the room. I heard a car door close and I sprung up. I went to the door and locked it. Knowing him he'll come in and decide what to do next. Footsteps.. the door knob wiggled. "Open this door!!" He said. I shook my head knowing he couldn't see me. I haven't spoken a word ever since my mother was no longer with me. I sat back down and folded my arms across my chest. There was banging then there was nothing. I tried sighing in relief but no sound came out. I was still on the floor when again I heard footsteps but this time they were louder.. stronger.. He couldn't get in. No way in hell could he get in. "I warned you." he said calmly. i heard a click and I shut my eyes closed. He had gotten in..  And now it's going to be 10 times worse than it would have been. He walked over to me. not saying a word just holding up his hand. All you heard was a smack and that's all. I didn't dare move... I sat there not doing anything.. Not saying anything. If anything I was immune to the pain. He grabbed my hair and pulled it dragging me with him. He slammed me again my bed. Again not saying anything. He kicked me and kicked me. Over and over again.. He wanted tears. He wanted screams. But I wasn't going to give him the happiness. He stood there had on his waist. He toke off his belt and held it in his hands. He raised it high. I knew what was going to happen next. If I tried shielding myself he would just do it again. I hadn't realized tears had escaped from my eyes. He laughed and kicked me a couple more times. Then he walked towards the door and slammed it. I lay there numb and terrified. If I left he would find me.. If I didn't he would probably kill me. After continuous thinking I decided I had to go. I didn't know where but I didn't really care where. i had no friends. I had no relatives that WEREN'T terrified of my father. I was alone. I hadn't been outside much. I didn't go to school either. I had no teachers that cared for me. My room was in the second floor. It used to be on the first but my father knew I would try to ran away so he put me up high. But when you have nothing to lose you give a damn how you get out. You just get out. I packed a bag, Just one little bag. I had nothing valuable. Only a few pictures and SOME clothes that didn't have blood stains or rips in them. I opened the window and put my head out. Air... Fresh air! I heard my door swing open and my father was there drunk. I didn't have much time. He would get his senses back sooner or later. I was right he got his senses and ran up to me. I put my legs out and my foot touched the window cell of the one downstairs. My father griped my hair and pulled it. I struggled as my other foot tried touching the window cell. I dug my nails deep into my fathers arm. He swore under his breath as I jumped from the window. I landed wrong and now my ankle ached. But as long as I was away from him I could manage. I was used to pain. I was 17 and my name is Jailene.   

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