Where Have You Been All My Life?!?!

Kamila has lived her whole life with a question wavering over her head. She has been living her whole life without a dad not knowing anything about him; whether he left her, was forced to leave, in jail, or even worse dead. What happens when her mom is dead and the person she is forced to live with is her dad... Someone named Paul. Kamila doesn't want to live with this unknown stranger so she tries to fight obstacles and avoid him but seems to find him in the most unexpected places. What happens when she is led to the biggest boy band in the world? and they already know her...???

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3. Theres No Point of Living!

 

Kamila's POV-

It was just another lonely boring day at school for me; at least at first it was...

As I was walking home from school I called Charlee but as soon as she answered I heard crying on the other end and could hear her say "I’m really sorry Kamila," in a sympathetic and sad voice. I was so confused at this point; what was she sorry about?

"What?" I simply said back into the phone.

"I have to go; just remember I'm here for you," Charlee was really confusing me by this point. She never just hangs up like that. Something was going on but I was trying to put it in the back of my head. 

"WWWEEEOOOO WWWWEEEOOO WWEEEOOO BEEP BEEP!!!!!!" The noise of sirens from ambulance came rushing past me, heading foreword down the street at full speed. 

I was two blocks away from my house and I just wanted to lie in my bed and get away from this strange, unusual, confusing day I was having. But that wasn't going to happen; that was just the beginning of my nightmare. 

The ambulance came to a sudden stop two blocks in front of me where all my attention was directed. The ambulance had stopped at my house. I never for one second thought that that’s where the ambulance was heading as it passed but I guess I should have considering it from the kind of day I was having.

I dropped everything I had and ran in fear as fast as my skinny little legs would let me. By now everyone from the ambulance evacuated and were charging through my front door. I could see a few of my neighbors just watching from afar.

I ran into my house to see a bunch of strangers in my kitchen in a huddle. I saw blond hair sprawled on the ground. It was my mom. 

I didn't even know what happened but I already had tears speeding down my face faster and faster as I was screaming. I ran over to my mother’s side repeatedly asking questions or at least trying to. Out of the many people there; none of them were even noticing me; they had full attention towards my mom. I pinched my self over and over again harder and harder until I screamed it hurt so badly. This was no dream... My mom was on the floor unconscious and I; her daughter was clueless not knowing what happened to her.

Finally after what seemed like 20 minutes (but was really just a matter of minutes) of watching my mom looking lifeless a woman that was in uniform noticed me. 

"Is this your mom?" the woman asked me as I nodded my head whipping my tears away that reappeared instantly. "Your neighbors called us saying they found her on the ground. Your mom has suffered a really bad and serious heart attack." I started crying even harder than I already was (not sure how it was possible) and started making unpleasant weeping noises. The woman looked at me with sympathy and she was trying to say something but it was stumbling on her words. "I’m r-really sorry honey... b-but your mom is... gone." The woman said rubbing my back. I started hitting the innocent woman not letting myself believe the words I just heard.

I ran over to my mom who was now being lifted up on some yellow platform heading towards the ambulance truck. Her beautiful blue, hazily eyes were stuck open and I just starred into them. They were filled with fear and sorrow. No thought about it, my mother died in pain and that was no way she deserved to die.

"Can’t you do something?? Anything??..." I hopefully asked the two men who were carrying my mom. 

The two men looked at each other with sorrow and the one with the buzz cut said, "No, I'm sorry we have tried everything there is. We were too late; she's gone."

I stopped in my footsteps taking on last glance at my mom’s dead body. This was the end and I would never see my mom ever again; I would never hear her voice... ever. I kissed my moms cheek and whispered, "I love you." as a teardrop dripped down onto her cold breathless face. 

Watching, as the ambulance slowly packed my mom into the truck and drove away I started blaming myself more and more. "I could of came home faster and been there for her. She wouldn’t have had to suffer. ITS ALL MY FAULT!!" I kept saying to myself. I was having a mental breakdown on the inside and was absolutely losing it; I was hitting everything in my view. This was all just too much for me to handle. 

I ran into the house in furry, stomping my feet as load as possible against the wooden floor. I didn't know what to do with my life; my mom was all I had... literally. I didn't even have a single friend or family member I knew besides Charlee. But it wasn't like I could go to her, she was trapped in a orphanage... who knows maybe I would have to end up there if there’s no where for me to go on my mothers will.

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It has been two days since my mom has been gone. I have been lying in my bed crying, not eating, and just thinking about what I'm going to do with my life. Whenever I needed help for anything I would go to my mom but in this case I wasn't able to do that. I needed help but it wasn't like there was anyone there to tell me that. I guess this was the way I was going to live the rest of my life... depressed forever.

"Ding Dong!" I heard the doorbell ring but I didn't have the energy or desire to answer the door. 

"It's me, Julian, your moms lawyer. I am here with your mothers Will; I was waiting to open it with you." Suddenly when I heard that this girl Julian was here with my moms Will I quickly went to the door.

Julian looked at me and gave me a smile quickly fading, as she looked me up and down not that I cared at the moment of how I looked. "Come in." I told Julian leading my hand welcoming her in. We sat down across from each other at my dinner table. She was sitting in my mother’s seat that she always sat at and I looked at her imagining my mother sitting in that exact seat like before. It was so different not having my mother here; in the air I felt unprotected, unloved and just misery lurking around.

"Alright I don't know what your mother has put into her will but if she has put a guardian in it for you then today you will need to get your things together and join whom ever it may be." Julian informed me holding the piece of paper tightly. I nodded my head in response anxious of what my mom has written. 

Julian carefully and slowly broke the seal on the envelope taking the long letter out. Julian started to read aloud the Will and every word my mom said was just comforting me more and more. While she was reading I had a little more comfort about my moms death realizing she will always be my amazing mother that will always be watching me from above and that one day I would join her. 

Julian took a break half way through handing me a Kleenex box and kept on reading. When she got to the part of where it said whom my guardian was she looked at me asking if I was ready, and I anxiously nodded in reply. 

I was going to be staying with me dad, Paul. My mom explained the whole story how he never knew about me and that he was a nice friendly funny guy that will protect me; but deep down inside I was feeling discomfort. 

After all these years of wondering about my father, now I knew. I didn't want to go live with my dad. I was scared.

 

More and more questions popped into my head after Julian left leaving the letter saying that she would be back later. What if my dad was too busy for me? Does he even want me or is he just being forced to take care of me? Was my father even told about me, and what happened to my mom?

My brain was exploding with questions and thoughts and worries; and on top of my moms death I couldn't take it all. 

 

 

 

 

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