i never saw you coming

Amelia, id the perfect seventeen year old girl, she has good grades, she knows where she's heading in her life and shes always been focused, but that all changes when her and her four best friends win a contest to go on tour with One Direction. where Amelia meets a boy who flips her perfect life upside down. a story filled with love, tears, betrayal and humor. all things that go up have to come down eventually.

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57. Chapter 54

After an hour Niall calms me down, and I stepped away from him,

 

“I..I need to take a shower.” I sigh,

“Okay, I’ll be waiting here when your done.” he tells me and I nod.

 

I walk into the bathroom and stare at my reflection. I look like the definition of death, my eyes are puffy, my skin is pale, my eyes are hollow and my overall appearance looks drained.

I’m unsure what to do about Niall and I because I want us to work but I don’t know how I can get through this. I don’t know how I can look at him and not picture that girl all over his body while he allows it.

As I’m about to strip off my clothes I can’t. I can’t because not knowing where Niall and I stand is hurting me more then the nightmare. I splash my face with water and quickly lather a cleanser over it and rinse it off before sitting on the toilet weighing my options.

I don’t feel as vulnerable and scared as I did a few hours ago so maybe I can sort this out now. I love Niall, thats a fact, he makes me really happy, and he brings out a side of me I didn't know was there, but on the other hand, he hurts me the most, when he does shit like this it ruins me, drains me matter of fact. Is this utter despair and sadness worth the amount of happiness he gives me? Yes, I don’t even have to think about it, no matter what mistakes are made between us they are all fixable if I am able to feel complete and happy again.

 Is this the same though is this mistake fixable? The hickeys on his neck will fade but the distrust in my heart will stay, will he ever prove to me that I can trust him? I want to move past this, I do but how? How do I forgot about his intoxicated lack of loyalty? 

Before I can finish my thoughts theres a light knock on the door,

“yes?” I say,

 

“I just wanted to check on you, I don’t hear the water running.” Niall says and I sigh and sit up and open the washroom door.

 

“I want to talk about what happened now.” I tell him, he looks worried,

 

“are you sure you want to talk about it now, we can wait until tomorrow.” Niall says and I shake my head,

 

“I can’t do that, the unresolved problem is consuming my brain and I am anxious, so I want this to be resolved.” I tell him and he nods,

“Okay, shall we sit on the bed?” he questions and I nod as he guides the way.

 

As soon as we are both seated Niall speaks first,

 

“Before you say anything, you have to know I love you more then anything in this world and sometimes I am such a fuck up that I do shit like this, but right now I am so scared of loosing you and I will do anything to prevent that from happening.” he says and I nod,

 

“what did you two do?” I ask needing to know the details,

 

“We were both drunk and high and she came on to me, but I didn't stop her and for some fucked twisted reason I was going to fuck her because I for some reason want to mess up everything good in my life but I stopped it, I didn't care for her like I care for you, I couldn't go through with it, the whole time I was thinking about you, and you shouldn't forgive me but I need you too, even though you don’t have to and you don’t have to trust me, but you need to know that never again will I even look at a girl because your the only one I need.” he says, I gulp,

“ Niall, I know you and I know that you didn't mean to hurt me, but you did and unless you figure out how to communicate with me instead of running out and getting drunk, this is not going to work. I love you, but I don’t know if I can look at you the same way anymore.” I choke, letting a few tears slide,not looking at Niall.

I feel the bed dip and then I feel his hand on top of mine.

“I know babe, I fucking wish she wouldn't of left these fucking marks on me because I’m all yours, she has nothing on me, nothing. Nothing about her appeals to me because she’s not you and I love you. I promise for now on its just me and you no more of the alcohol, I want you and only you, no one else, please forgive me.” he says and a tear falls from his eyes,

 

“I’ll do this for real this time, no more games. No more of any of this, please just give me a chance, please.” he begins to sob now holding on to my thighs and I rub his back gently.

 

“Niall.” I say,

“please don’t tell me, you can’t do this anymore please.” he begs and I sigh, seeing him breaking in front of me, makes my heart hurt. I know he doesn't want to hurt me, I know he loves me and its moments like these that make me rethink everything.

 

“I want to do this Niall, I do. I want to work through this and I want everything to be okay again but, its going to take time.” I tell him and he looks up at me.

 

“your not giving up on me?” he asks vulnerability clear in his voice and I shake my head placing my hands on his cheeks,

 

“I don’t think I can do that.” I tell him, and he wraps me close to him and kisses me slowly and when I pull away from him, I believe every promise he made, and I believe he will better himself and if thats the case I can’t let him go. 

“Thank you Amelia, I love you.” he says,

“And I love you.” I reply and stand up heading to my side of the bed, before I can lay down Niall takes my hand and I look at him,

“don’t you still need a shower?” he questions and I shrug,

“I’ll do it tomorrow.” I say,

“Or we can take one now, together.” he smirks and I look at him,

“after all that you want to shower with me?” I question raising my eyebrow,

“ I want to be with you more then ever right now, and do something I’ve never done with someone.” he simply says,

“You’ve never showered with someone?” I question, he shakes his head,

“no its always been meaningless sex with the girls before you.” he says and I slightly smile,

“your a mess, come on.” he says taking my hand and dragging me into the bathroom. I stare at him and he wipes under my eyes,

“I’m sorry for being the one to make you cry.” he sighs and I shrug

“All that matters right now is that we are going to work through this” I say and he sighs,

“I know its not the time but I need to tell you something.” he then says, and I nod my head, encouraging him to continue,

“Ashton is traveling back to London to see my dad and invited me to tag along and if your up to it, I’d like you to come with me.” he says and my eyes widen.

“your going to see your father?” I ask,

“well I thought about what you said and maybe it would bring me some comfort, I guess and I want you to be there with me.” he says and I nod,

“of course I will, when is this happening?” I ask,

“after the german shows, we have a bit of time off.” he says,

“sounds good.” I say and he nods. 

 

He then begins to slide off his shirt and I stare at the hickeys dressing his neck and feel my heart sink again, Niall notices as he comes to me,

 

“babe, she meant nothing to me, your the only girl I want to leave marks on me.” he says and I nod, as I slowly slip off my shirt and pants as he slides down his pants. 

 

I turn away from Niall as I remove my bra and he turns me around,

 

“ I can’t look at you.” I sigh to him,

“I’m sorry, baby.” he sighs,

“I don’t know if I can be with you in this way right now.” I tell him looking at my feet, he sighs,

 

“I understand, Ames, how about I go in there and if you feel better about me washing you, you join me?” he suggests and I nod my head as I hear him turn on the shower. 

 

He kisses my cheek before stepping into the shower and closing the curtain. I  look at his silhouette in the shower, I grab a towel and sit on the toilet seat for a minute, trying to clear my mind. Seeing those hickeys remind me of him being with somebody else and I don't think I can handle having that reminder hanging over my head as we stand naked together with water pouring onto our heads.

 

I take another moment to think, he said he is sorry and if I can’t take this first step in forgiving him in the sense of letting him see me undressed and seeing him in all his glory then how can I reach a point where I fully forgive him.

 

I stand up and slide off my underwear and slide the curtain open to catch Niall’s eyes and his slight smile. I step inside and Niall wraps his arms around me.

 

he hums into my hair, “thanks for joining me.” he says and I smile a bit and he leans down and kisses me softly. 

 

He then puts some soap on a sponge and then guides it along my body slowly staring at my eyes.

 

He scrubs it onto my chest and then turns me around and rubs my back with the soap lathering it around,  I lean my head back against his chest,

“your the first girl, I’ve ever cared for, and the first to drive me fucking crazy.” he says and I smile.

 I turn towards him again and take the sponge from his hand and scrub him down, he watches me contently as I lather his body with the soap, I bend down to get the lower part of his stomach and look up at him to see his smile turn into a smirk. I stand up straight again,

 

“I love you.” Niall groans and my eyes fall onto the hickeys again,

 

“lean closer to me.” I tell him and he listens.

 

“I want to leave my mark on you.” I say with a bit of a blush and he smirks,

“go ahead.” he says, and I feel my face go redder,

 

“how do I do it?” I ask embarrassed and he smirks,

“you’ve never given someone a hickey before?” he questions, I shake my head,

“ how about we just kiss for a bit and then I’ll show you.” he smirks, and I smile as I pull him towards me and kiss him. It starts off as sweet and then it deepens and he has his hands on my bare butt pushing me closer so there is no space between us,

 

Niall begins to move his lips away from my lips and continues to kiss my jawbone then my neck, he stays on the same spot and then I feel him sucking the skin, and I moan in pleasure and he holds me tighter and I sigh then he removes his lips and I look at my neck to see a little red mark,

“all mine.” he groans and I grab his face again and kiss him again and then lift my lips to his collarbone a place where he had nothing,

 

“just suck on the skin.” he groans and I do what he says and suck the skin and then move my lips over and kiss his neck and try again to leave a mark and then I go back to the original one and try to make it stronger and I hear Niall groan and before I can continue he grabs my face and smashes his lips to mine and I smile,

“fuck.” he says and I smile,

“did I do it?” I ask and he nods his head. 

“I hope that bartender knows that your mine.” I sigh and Niall laughs,

“baby I’ll always be yours.” he sighs and the moment feels so good.

 

“lets wash your hair yeah?” he suggests, I nod. 

 

He grabs the shampoo bottle and pours some of it in his hand before massaging it into my hair and I close my eyes not wanting the soap to get into my eyes,

“open your eyes.” he says,

 

“no I’ll get soap in my eyes!” I exclaim and he laughs continuing his action before I rinse it off. I put some shampoo on my hands and then pull Niall down to me and run my fingers delicately through his hair using my nails to scratch it gently and he moans. Soon enough he rinses his hair and then he pins me against the wall and kisses me more,

 

“Baby, I can’t get enough of you.” he groans kissing me viciously and I smile. As his hands are about to rub my boobs he looks at me for permission,

“is it okay?” he asks and I nod,

“please.” I beg him and, he smiles as he rubs my boobs and hold them in his hands he rolls my nipples between his fingers and it makes me moan, the pleasure is amazing, he leans his mouth down and begins to leave sloppy kisses around my boobs sucking and I moan,

“Niall.” I breath and then he sucks on the flesh and my eyes flutter close, he darts his tongue out as he sucks and then backs away and I groan. 

 

“Lets dry off.” he says turning off the water and stepping out and I follow. 

He grabs his towel and wipes his body off and I take mine and do the same, but still crave Niall's touch more not yet having enough of him. 

 

“Ames how are you feeling?” he asks me,

 

“good.” I tell him as we both step out of the washroom and as I’m about to open my drawer to get some clothes Niall grabs onto me,

 

“you didn't think we were done, did you?” he asks and I smile as he pulls me to him and kisses me taking my towel away from me and dropping his own.

 

As we kiss I feel my body touch the bed and I lay back on it detaching our lips for a mere minute before our lips reattach. I feel his member on my stomach and I feel around his body tracing out his toned body, Niall then grabs my hands and pins them above my head and he begins to kiss my body down and I moan wanting to run my hands in his hair, he reaches in between my legs and he leaves sloppy kisses making me moan and he breathes softly in my home and my legs feel weak, he then darts his tongue inside of me and it makes me go crazy,

 

“Niall.” I breath loving the way his tongue dances along my centre sending me to space, I try to push my hands out of his grasp but he keeps them there and my back arches with pleasure,

 

Niall continues the action but then removes his tongue and replaces them with his large fingers, dipping one inside and pumping making me moan more, and Niall lets go of my hands and they immediately reach for his hair and  I pull feeling everything, soon he adds two fingers inside and at first its uncomfortable but then it gets better and better and soon he pumps faster and as I’m about to reach my climax he slows down and I groan,

 

“Niall.” I beg and he looks at me,

 

“Faster.” I say feeling incredible, 

 

“are you close?” he asks, I nod my head and then he removes his fingers and I whimper, and he laughs,

“be patient baby.” he says and then positions himself before darting his tongue in and around my centre quickly, and soon enough my legs go weak and with one last moan, I reach my high and my back arches before falling to the bed and Niall comes back up and I lay with my eyes shut taking in the sensation. 

Niall comes and kisses my cheek again and I smile. 

 

“was that good?” he asks,

 

“yes.” I sigh and he smiles. He gets up and puts on a fresh pair of boxers and I follow him up and look through my stuff and slide on some underwear and a baggy white t shirt.

 

I go over to the bed and place my legs on both sides of Niall and sit on his lower stomach, he looks up at me,

 

“are you tired?” I ask him and he yawns as he shakes his head,

 

“what are you doing?” he asks, I shrug,

 

“I love you.” I say leaning down and peaking his lips but he wraps his arms around my waist making me fall with all my weight on him, he continues to kiss me and I smile.

 

“your very needy today.” he tells me and I scoff,’

“you mean you?” I question and he shrugs,

 

“ you drive me crazy, Ames.” he sighs nuzzling his head into my neck and I laugh, and then sit up again on him.

 

“What time is it?” I ask him he shrugs,

 

“four in the morning.” he shrugs and I gasp,

 

“Oh my.” I say and he nods.

As I’m about to get off of Niall he takes my hand,

 

“stay.” he says and I raise my eyebrows,

 

“ I can’t sleep like this.” I tell him,

 

“lay down on me then like before.” he says,

 

“ you won’t be able to breath!” I exclaim and he shakes his head, as he pulls me down to him again and as he does my balance stumbles again and I can only imagine we look like a pile of skin and bone,

 

“much better.” he muses and I place my head underneath his,

 

“I love you, and no one else, ever.” he says before kissing the top of my head,

 

“ I love you.” I tell him breathing him in,

 

“ are we okay from before, now?” he asks with worry in his voice and all I do is kiss the bite I gave him earlier,

 

“I still don’t fully forgive you but I know I will get there.If I’m yours then your mine for however long.” I say and he nods,

 

“ I want you to know everything that happened between that girl and me was nothing like this, fuck I wish I never even went out and fooled around if I knew this would happen.” he says,

 

“please lets just not talk about her.” I sigh and he nods.

Soon enough I find myself wrapping my arms around Niall’s arm and soon enough I fall asleep to one of the best sleeps of this week.

 
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