For The Love Of Leesi

Eighteen years and I have finally found out who my parents are--well my father anyway. Knowing that you're father is Zayn Malik from the used-to-be huge boy band is a complete change. So it looks like I'm spending the summer in London. It's time to learn who I really am, who I truly love, and if in the end I will able to tell the difference from reality and fantasy. *Sequel to For The Love Of Clara*

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16. Forever Lasting

I kept running, on the sidewalk, in busy London. I heard some people saying my name, noticing who I was, but I didn't care.

I lost my shoes a way back and now my tears were running down my face as fast as my feet were on the concrete. 

I was sure of Jed closely behind me, but I didn't turn around. I found an alleyway and hid myself there. Leaning against the brick, in between two office buildings. I looked down at my already disgusting and dirty feet, before I let my head fall back. 

Tears were coming willing down my face, unable to be stopped. I've wanted to cry so long, to have meaning to expose yourself with tears, and here they are. Here are the tears I so craved to know I could feel. 

Except I didn't think the tears would be caused by the arrival of my mother. 

My mother that was said to be dead. My mother who was said to be a great person, and loved everyone. 

She couldn't love everyone. She didn't love me. 

How could a mother fake her death? So she could rescue her own life? So she could never see her daughter? 

It was disturbing and I hated every part of it. 

"Lees."

I turned my head and saw Jed gasping for air as he turned into the alleyway, carrying my shoes. 

"Go away," I muttered, over my tears. 

"I'm not going anywhere."

"Why?" I turned on him, almost yelling. "Why don't you vanish, leave me alone, like every other fucking person."

"Calm down," he breathed. "No one is leaving you."

I scoffed, "I hate this."

"I hate it too," he said. "I hate every part of it, but you know what? I get through it."

"How can you?" I'm not sure it sounded like I wanted it to due to my tears, but it worked. 

"Life is never easy, but you need to believe it will always get better. In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life, it goes on."

"Please don't feed me your father's lyrics."

He laughed. "My dad didn't say that. Robert Frost did and he's right. Leesi, I can't really say anything that will make you feel better right now, but maybe she made a mistake--."

"Mistake? She chose to stay out of my life."

"I know, but maybe she knows she made a wrong decision."

I looked directly at him, "I want nothing to do with her." I walked past him and back onto the busy road. 

"I wouldn't want anything with her either," Jed soon said beside me. 

I ignored him, crossing my arms, feeling sprinkles of rain touching my skin. 

"Come on," he said, grabbing hold of my arm. "It's about to rain." He reached for his cell phone and dialed a number. "Yea, I got her. Five blocks away."

I didn't look at Jed, still fuming with anger. Soon Ken appeared in a black car, and Jed opened the door for me. I slid inside and watched outside as the rain quickly came down faster and faster. 

Matching my tears.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The rain stopped by the time the car pulled outside Zayn's apartment. I exhaled. "Please, Jed, let's vanish, go away for a little while."

"I would love to, but we all need to know what's going on." 

I watched the front door, lit by the lamp on the wall. I heard a door close and open and soon Jed was on my side, opening the door for me. 

I stepped out and looked up at him. 

"I'm here," he whispered into my ear. 

I slowly walked up the stairs with his words, and into my dad's apartment. 

"Leesi?" My name immediately echoed throughout the flat. "Leesi, we need to talk."

I reached for Jed's hand quickly. His lips came close to my ear. "Go up to your room." 

I made a quick glance at him before he pushed me up the stairs. I ran to the top, hearing Zayn.

"Jed?" 

"Hey Zayn," he started. "Lees went upstairs for a second, she isn't feeling good."

"She knows," Zayn said. 

"Yeah," he started. "I'm going to make sure she's okay." 

"Okay." 

There was silence and then Jed's eyes as he looked up at me at the top of the stairs. He raced to reach me, and then looked down at my feet. 

"Let's go get clean," he muttered. 

I opened the bathroom door and he started the water in the bath. After a few minutes I placed my feet in the warm water, the dirt and mud flowing into the water. I sat on the edge of the bathtub as Jed sat with me. 

He bent over and cleaned my feet with a washrag. I watched him with certainty. 

If he wasn't here, this would be difficult. He was the one who got me through everything, he helps me. Keeps me whole. 

"Jed," I muttered. "Thank you." 

He turned his head looking up at me, "You're welcome."

"I love you," I whispered, hardly audible. 

He stopped, wiping his wet hands on his jeans. He made eye contact that was full of emotion, so much that I felt like I wanted to cry again. "I love you too." 

With that a simple kiss was placed on my lips. Passionate, and burning into my skin to forever last. 

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