Olivia Kirk watched her parents get brutally murdered and is forced to move in with her abusive uncle. He abuses her in many terrible ways. Somehow though she holds it all together and starts art college. There she reunites with her cousin Louis Tomlinson. She also meets four other amazing guys who turn her life around. They teach her how to trust and love. But what happens when she falls for all of them? Will her past and present affect her future?

This is my first fanfiction so I hope you'll read it...and give me feedback...nicely. Well hope you enjoy(: xx


57. Chapter Forty-Eight

Liam's POV

I slowly took out my letter and unfolded the sheet and started to read:

  Dear Liam, I'm sure you've found out by now that I have killed myself. Don't worry, I didn't suffer. I went peacefully and painlessly. This is for the best, it really is. I don't want to hurt you anymore...especially when I wasn't good enough. Nor would I ever be. It was a fact and I was reminded everyday...I'm sorry for hurting you and wasting your time and please understand. Please, please forgive me. Don't think it was because I didn't love because I did more than anything. Even me. I want you to know you taught me what love was. You taught me how to trust again. You were my everything. So, please just remember me and move on. Go get that music career you've dreamed of. They may just have liked you at 14, but now they'll love you. I know I do. Just please, never forget. I love you Li Li.   Forever and Always, Liv.   P.S. Thanks....for everything. Stay away from those spoons.     I read the letter over and over again...she killed herself? No...she tried....she couldn't be gone. No....that's not right...there's no way. No. It didn't happen. It couldn't have...could it?     Louis's POV I eagerly open the letter and start to read:   Dear Lou, By now Im already gone. It was for the best. I was such a burden. I know you're going to be sad when you read this, but what do you do when you get sad? You cheer people up. Cheer yourself up. Be happy and understand. You of all people will understand. My uncle hit Liam....and the texts got....worse. I was trying to be strong, but I just kept bringing everyone else down. Including you, it wasnt worth I ended it. I really am sorry, but I love you cousin. Don't forget that. Someone's gonna make you really happy soon so be patient and don't forget me. You taught me how to live life to the fullest and to be who I am. You taught me what family really is. You really did make me a better person. So move on, but don't forget me. I love you Superman.   Stay You, LibbyBoo   P.S Eat some carrots for me.   What? A suicide note! She killed herself! I-I just can't believe it...but she was right I did understand. I would've killed myself long before she did...I jut can't take this...   Zayn's POV I open my envelope and try to stay positive. It didn't promising, but I had to read it:   Dear Zayn, I'm gone now, but you already knew that. Knowing you, you probably knew earlier today. I'm sorry, but it was for the best. You know that. I don't have to explain it to you. You know I've never had to explain anything to you. You understood, so understand now. Don't cry, don't be sad. Move on, be okay. I know you can. You're strong. Zayn you taught me what a friend was. You gave me some of the best advice. Some advice that led me to Liam. The guy I truly loved with all I had. So thank you. Keep the advice going, tell the boys to move on. Make them okay. I know you can. I know it's a lot to ask...but just one more favor. Don't forget me. Ever. I love you Zaynie. Stay Strong, Lib   P.S. keep that hair glossy.   That was the most bittersweet thing I've ever read. It was filled with sweet little momentos, but also with the worst news I've ever heard. My Libby's gone...forever....The girl I loved. The girl I couldn't get over. The girl who was mine, but not mine. The girl who I understood, who understood me. The hole in my heart came back. The one Pamela...reopened by Libby. I don't know if I can survive this twice....   Nialls POV I didn't know what I was expecting when I opened that letter, but it didn't seem like it was good. I read it without hesitation though:

Dear Niall,
I know that when you read this, you'll know I'm gone. I'm so sorry. I didn't want to hurt you anymore. I still think about how I hurt you that night you confessed you loved me. i know that's what I'm doing now, but trust me, it's better this way. Things just got so bad...please understand. My uncle hit Liam...because of me. I know you probably want to stop reading and go stress eat, but please keep reading.
You taught me to be myself, no matter what, or who was around. You taught me it's okay to be different. I want you to move on. I want you to finally find that princess we've been talking about. Don't give up. Move on, be happy, but please don't ever forget me. Ever.
I love you Nialler.
Stay Hungry My Friend,
Libby, your Potato.

P.S. Just remember potatoes gonna potate.

I stare at the letter in she...she killed herself? I look down at the letter and the feelings that I've kept bottled up for the past months came out. I loved her so much and as much much more that a friend or sister. I didn't want her to go. I wanted her back! She was my Potato! Mine! Oh God, Libby....WHY?! I start to cry harder. I can't control it. I'm gonna miss her so much...

Harry's POV
For some reason I am in no hurry to open this letter. Maybe it's the guilt...I don't deserve a letter from her. There's something else too...something seems final about it.....there's also the part of me that NEEDS to open this letter. So I do:

Dear Harry,
I'm gone. I know. You're probably the least upset right now. I mean after all I put you through and all, but I want you to know how sorry I am. I want you to know that I never wanted to hurt you...not like that...not in any way. I want you to also know there was a time when I loved you the way you loved me. It's just Liam, there was something different about the love. There was more passion, we understood each other. Regardless, I did love you. A lot. So don't be too upset with me. I wish you would have forgiven me before I had to leave. I don't know why you got so distant these passed few months, but if it was because of me and Liam. I apologize you were upset. If it was because of something else..I wish I could take it back. I'm so sorry.

Besides all that, you taught me that I should always fight no matter what the circumstances. I know I haven't shown the greatest example...but this was for the best. You also taught me how to be happy and carefree. I liked it that way...just please move on. Find a girl that's not going to damage you as I did. Find a girl that will hold you close and love you right. The way I never could. Be happy, just don't forget me.
I love you Haz.
Stay Cheeky,

P.S. Keep those curls curly.

She loved me? She did....and she was apologizing. She's dead because of me and she's apologizing to me. That's not even fair! I helped make her life a living hell and was shagging the bitch who did it! What a prick...I'm such a prick. I don't deserve this...I don't deserve to ever look at Louis or Liam again. This wasn't fair...I killed Libby.

Liam's POV
It finally sinks in that she's really gone when they bring out a stretcher with a body bag....that contained my Liv. My love. My life. All gone. Snatched away by all the cruelness...I can't believe we both had our first and last time last night. I wasn't ever going to touch another girl. I couldn't, there was no way. I started to feel the tears sliding down my face. All the memories flooded back...I could almost feel her walking into me. I could see her Oreo covered face...The terrified look on her face during The Shining. Her face when she got sassy, her beautiful green eyes, her smile, her frown, her tears, her laugh, her hair, her legs, her arms, her nails, her hands, her eyelashes....just everything hit me at once. All the things I needed, gone. Forever. I couldn't do this...I needed to be with my Liv, and there was only one way to do that.


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