Bromley Academy- A One Direction/District3 Love Story

Ally has moved from her home in Sydney, Australia, to Croydon on the outskirts of London. She's starting off at a new Boarding Academy called Bromley Academy London, where she is studying music. On her first day, she makes friends with a group of musical prodigys, and it seems like there's love at first sight. Is everything what it seems, or will a dirty little secret ruin her new frienships?

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30. Guilty

ALLY

 

"Harry... No." I said, pulling away. He stared into my eyes, sad and rejected. Then, he moved back.

 

"Oh, no. Ally, I didn't mean to, I was thinking about Jade and it just happened. I am so sorry." He said. I nodded and wiped my lips with the back of my hand, wishing that it would make the tingling sensation go away.

 

"It's okay... but I think I should go find Niall. It's been a hard night anyway." I said. Harry nodded and sat back in Jade's bed, staring at the cieling. I got to my feet and gave an awkward wave as I left the room. A friend had died and another had kissed me all in one day. It was like a rollercoaster was spinning over and over in my head, and each cart was another thing to think about. I wish I was back in Australia where no boys even looked my way.

 

"Hey." Niall said as I walked back into his room. He was leaning against the wall on his bed, tears in his eyes. He was staring at a roll of polaroid film, and he quickly stuffed it away in his drawer when I walked in. "How's Harry holding up?" He asked. I shrugged and tried not to look guilty. It was an accident, why did I feel like I was to blame? "And... how are you holding up?" Niall asked, sitting forward a little. I curled my legs under myself and sat down on Niall's bed. He slipped an arm around my shoulders hesitantly.

 

"Uh, alright. I guess I'm used to it. I mean, I was next to my brother when he died." I said. An image of the gash down the side of Michael's head popped into my mind and I shook it away, sinking into Niall's side. This is what comfort is meant to feel like, not Harry's thick arms. But why did I feel so out of place? "Niall, I have something to tell you." I blurted out. He looked at me, worry lacing the blue in his eyes.

 

"I have something to tell you too." He said nervously. I nodded. "Ladies first." Niall said finally. I sighed and looked down at my fingers.

 

"Harry and I kissed." I breathed. Niall let out a sigh of relief.

 

"Demi and I kissed." He said. My mouth dropped open, and I stared at him. He bit his lip and nodded. "Yesterday. I found her leaving my room and asked her what she was doing and she just kissed me and left." Niall said. I nodded slowly. I looked around the room to see if anything was out of place.

 

"Did she tell you what she was doing?" I asked. Niall shook his head. "Well, let's find out." I said. Niall gave me a weird look. I don't know why I wasn't in shock about the kiss, maybe it was because I was guilty too. Instead of talking, I got off his bed and started looking through the papers on his desk, the folders on his dresser, and soon he was looking in all the drawers and the bedsheets. Finally, we gave up.

 

"Nothing." Niall sighed, lying down on the floor. I laid down next to him on my stomach, my head resting in my hands.

 

"I wish we knew what she was doing, why she was here. Why she's dead." I said. Niall nodded.

 

"Do you think she killed herself?" He asked. I looked at him. I had never thought of that. "She cut herself. I saw the scars once, and I didn't say anything. It's my fault. I could have helped her." Niall said. I shook my head and held his hand, staring at a white tile on the wood under his bed.

 

"If I had gone to her room to take her to lunch like I planned, I could have gotten there in time to stop her." I said. The tile was off white, had a black line through the middle. Niall sighed again.

 

"I guess it's a little bit of everyone's fault, and no one's at the same time." He said. I nodded again. Something made me want to run my finger over the tile, feel the soft porcelin. I reached out and touched it, and it moved. I pulled it towards myself and picked it up. It was a white envelope with the words To My Niall scrawled on it in thick black pen.

 

"Niall! I found it!" I said, sitting upright. Niall jolted up, too, and leaned over my shoulder as I carefully opened the note.

 

Dear Niall,

I don't know how to tell you I love you without ruining everything. I mean, I've never been good at relationships anyway. I was never good enough for Joe, and I'll never be anything compared to Ally. She's perfect and you love eachother way too much. I can see it in the way you look at eachother, it fills a room like thick fog. You can't escape love, but you can escape the consequences. That's why I'm writing you this note, to say good bye. I'm escaping all of the trouble I could cause if I told you how I really feel. I feel lonely and empty and worthless, like the sun trying to break through that fog you and Ally have. Only I can't do it. So I'm giving up. I'm a quitter. And no matter where you go in life, I want you to know that I love you, every single thing about you. But mostly, I love the way you're with Ally. And I want that. Maybe I'll find it wherever I'm going.

Much love to all of my new friends at Bromley and to my amazing family,

Demi

P.S. Stay Strong

 

"It's all my fault." I whispered. Niall shhhed me and ran his hand up and down his back.

 

"No, it's my fault for being so damn irresistable." He tried to joke, but it was hollow. I looked at him.

 

"We should break up." I said. Niall stared at me. "Demi was in love with you, and I was with you. That's why she killed herself. I think we should break up." I said again. Niall shook his head.

 

"She's not here now, it's no use to break up. It doesn't do anyone any good. I love you, Ally." Niall said. I shook my head.

 

"You can love another girl just as easily. There are tons of girls falling for you, it won't be hard to replace me. And it is a use, to me. I'll feel guilty every day I'm with you, Niall." I said quietly. Niall sighed and unlaced our fingers.

 

"Okay. Then this is it?" He asked. I nodded and looked away, willing myself not to look into his eyes and cry. Niall touched my face so it was facing his, and gave me a long kiss, and then when we pulled apart it was our own good bye. I got to my feet and left his room without a word. As soon as the door closed behind me I let out a breath. It was too easy. Did I ever love him?

 

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