A living hell

“The world is full of cruelty. We’re full of hate and alienation from one and another. My life is a living hell~”

Ginny believes that she is not like the rest, her mind is full of demons trying to suffocate her on a daily basis. Every day is a struggle trying to survive high school and her broken home. Would she be able to survive or would she fall?


16. Chapter 13. Aunt Rosie's place

On our way to my aunts place I was thinking. Thinking of a lot of things, that I never really thought of before. Will things ever get any better? When will it ever be over? I hadn't realize this was affecting me really bad, but it was really noticeable to my mom. How come parents know when something is wrong with their child? It's probably a sense they have of being a parent. I didn't realize I was already crying, right after my mom was questioning me what really had happened. "Ginny tell me what really happened when I was gone?'' My mom stopped the car before we got to my aunt Rosie. She wont drive until I gave her an explanation of my beatings. "Nothing happened mom." I told her. "Como de que nothing? YOU ARE HALF BEATEN UP. YOU ARE BADLY BRUISE. YOUR ARE LUCKY THA-" I cut in, "THAT I'M ALIVE??? I WISH I WASN'T. BUT HEY I'M STILL HERE JUST FOR YOU AND MY LITTLE SIBLINGS. I DON'T CARE ABOUT MY DAD. HE'S BARELY HOME. MIGHT AS WELL IF HE DIDN'T EXIST TO ME. I TRY AND TRY TO BE BRAVE AND KEEP HOLDING ON. BUT HONESTLY, I KEEP FALLING BACK IN. IN MY OWN STUPID MISTAKES. I HATE DAD! SINCE HE LOST HIS JOB IT'S THE SAME LIVING NIGHTMARE OVER AND OVER AGIAN. THE SAME ONE I DREAM AWAKE AND ASLEEP. I CAN'T ESCAPE IT. IT'S STILL TRAP INSIDE OF ME. SOMEWHERE LOST IN MY MIND. I CAN'T FIND A WAY TO LET IT OUT. IT'S- IT'S- IT'S" "GINNY! SLOW DOWN. YOUR HAVING A PANIC ATTACK. JUST CALM YOURSELF DOWN AND BREATH." My mom said. "I CAN'T CALM DOWN. I DON'T WANT THIS ANYMORE." "GINNY. LISTEN TO ME! YOU DON'T MEAN ANYTHING YOU ARE SAYING. TRY TO CALM YOURSELF DOWN." "Now I'll continue to drive, stay quite and just breath steady. Don't think of anything else. Just close your eyes. In a few blocks will be at your aunts house. Once we got to aunt Rosie's place she was asking me too many questions. Guess my mom told her the whole thing that happened at home. Why can't people learn to keep their mouth shuts? "GINNY QUE THE PASO? (GINNY WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?) TU MAMA TIENE RAZON. TU PAPA ESTA LOCO!" (YOUR MOM IS RIGHT. YOUR DAD IS CRAZY.) LOOK AT THE WAY HE LEFT YOU. NO CHILD SHOULD GO THROUGH SOMETHING TERRIBLE LIKE THIS. MY POOR NIECE." my aunt said "I'm fine tia Rosie." "OH YOU ARE NOT FINE. WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU IS TERRIBLE." "I KNOW I'M NOT FINE. I'M TRYING TO MAKE MYSELF FEEL BETTER ABOUT MYSELF. I KNOW I LOOK HORRIBLE. I LOOK LIKE USELESS TRASH. WHY AM I STILL HERE. I WANT TO BE ALONE!!! WHY CAN'T NO ONE UNDERSTAND THAT!?? I ALREADY KNOW WHAT LONELY IS, SO WHY CAN'T I JUST LIVE IT AND LEAVE LIKE THAT? THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO MAKE THAT CHANGE!" I didn't mean to yell at my mom or aunt. I'm just so lost. I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I was starting to feel dizzy again. I was losing my vision, everything started becoming blurry. "GINNY ARE YOU OKAY YOU DON'T LOOK GOOD!??" My mom and aunt pointed it out. "LEAVE ME ALONE!!!" I yelled, as I closed my eyes and fell to the ground.

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