Without Her

*Third book in the Different From the Rest series* After Kady's death, Liam is clueless on what to do. He always relied on Kady to take care of their daughter. His wife is now dead and he must take care of a God-loving toddler that thinks death is a good thing. Told in only Liam's point if view he must learn the ups and downs of parenthood, how to change his ways, and move on after a heart wrenching loss of the love of his life.

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4. Mistake of my Life

After the reading of the will, the priest pulls me aside, "Hi, I'm Monsieur Sky. Right before your wife died, I talked to her a bit when she was going through the sacrament Healing of the Sick. She told me of how you weren't religious and she really wants you to be. Now, I'm not forcing you to do anything, but can you at least come to one mass? I think the Holy Spirit is in you, your just not letting it out."
 I nod my head, "Okay Monsieur Sky."
Lie, right there. No way am I ever going to Church, it's full of a bunch of thin-minded people that want an explanation of why there's a world and people. 

"Get up!!" Nadi Drew pulls at my T-shirt sleeve. I'm sleeping on the couch to avoid the pain of going into what used to be me and Kady's shared room. The room still has the stench of her perfume and no matter how many windows I open, the smell won't come out. There's the bed she slept in, the clothes she wore…I don't think I'll ever go in again after The Day Our Lives Fell Apart. 
"I'm hungry," continues Nadi Drew. 
"Then go make yourself some toast," I say. 
"Mommy says I can't make toast by myself."
"Well, you can now."
"How do I make toast?"
"Put some toast in the toaster and press down on the side thingy."
She gives me a confused look, but makes it anyways. I would help her, but I feel too depressed right now. I keep staring off into space and frankly, I think it's scaring my daughter. I don't know how to deal with a loss like this. I can't hide from everything that reminds me of her forever, our room, tea, and a certain path that she always takes on the beach. 
"So what are we doing today?" she asks. 
"Sleep."
"Come on, Mommy's gone, nothing you can do about it."
"That's why I want to sleep child."
She gives me a sassy look like, 'shut the fuck up.'

"I'm so sorry about Nadi Drew again," I peer down at the despicable child. It's Monday and this is the second time she's been sent home from preschool. 
"It's fine," the teacher says pressing her lips together to make a thin line. I take Nadi Drew's hand and I lead her back to the car, "What am I going to do with you?"
She shrugs her shoulders, "I don't know."
" I think we need a fresh start, away from here."
"Daddy, where would we go then?"
"A new place, but-but first, there are a lot of things I need to tell you."

The car ride was silent except for the humming of the radio. I take my daughter inside and I sit her down on the couch, "Okay, what do you need?"
"I need to tell you some things that I should have told you a very long time ago."  
Nadi Drew nods her head, waiting for the truth. I think she's excited because she's always known something has been wrong, and she's going to find out what. She is a lot smarter than Kady and I gave her credit for. Okay, how do I explain this to her? Should I be straight forward or have more of an introduction to it? Long or short? Do I really want to tell her this?
"So we have to move, we both need a new start," I say, my voice trembling with every word. 
"So, I need to tell you some things that Mommy and I have never told you before. The world is not like this town-nothing close. This is a private town, no one that doesn't live here or is visiting someone who lives here can come in. Most towns aren't like that, anyone can come in. Do you know what paparazzi are?"
Nadi Drew silently nods her heart shaped head. 
"They will visit our new town."
"Why?"
"Because, I was in a band, I was a celebrity. You have a Barbie doll of me."
"That's really creepy. Was Mommy also famous and what band were you in?"
"Mommy wasn't famous until we were dating. Everyone knew her as Liam Payne's girlfriend. I was in the band One Direction, the band that we listen to together."
Nadi Drew stares at the ground, "So you've been lying to me all of my life?"
"Yes, no, I mean kind of. It was just to keep you safe. Like Uncle Lou was in the band and his kids know."
"So who's in the band with you?"
"Uncle Lou, Uncle Niall, Uncle Harry, and Uncle Zayn."
"So where are we moving to?" she asks while walking out of the rectangular doorway. 
"Texas." 
I knew it was a mistake to tell Nadi Drew who we really were. The truth hurts. 

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