Ed's Girl (1D fanfic)

Max is a 16 year old girl who has fallen in Love! In love with a 20 year old though. That lucky guy is Ed Sheeran, and he feels the exact same way, that is probably the reason they have been dating for almost 2 years. She writes and he sings, and when ever he does write, it is always about her and her life. They just get each other. One day when ed introduces his girl to 5 of his best friends and lyrics singers One Direction? Think about it, then read Ed's Girl
- A Syd! Classic


4. chap.1 part.3

*All thanks to L.A for favoriting my book there is  Another chapter! Apples for apples people!


Max's POV

Edward is looking at me now. Sad as ever. What is going on?

"My manager just called me and,......" Ed says not finishing his sentence.

"And what?" I ask.

"And, it seems that I will be doing an all week gig in Russia on the week of your birthday." Ed tells me with a frown on his face. He sighs at the end of his sentence.

"Well that is okay, their would be other birthdays. Or I could just spend my birthday in Russia?" I ask.

Ed sighs then walks over to me. I stand up from the couch, then he looks straight into my eyes as he tells me this,"Max, you know I can't take you with me." he says looking very serious.

"Then I would not come with you, I will just get a plain ticket and stay in Russia for a week or so, then bump into you at one of your concert V.I.P sets." I says desperatly trying to find a way for me to see him.

"I am sorry Max, you know I really am, and I wish that could work too, but I think it would be the best if you did not come to Russia..... at all." he finally says. And when he does, my heart breaks into millions and millions of pieces.

I sigh," It is okay, but I have to go okay? I need to go home and......and.." I try finishing my excuse so I could go anywhere but here, but I just couldn't. I ran out the door, leaving my guitar and special pick on the couch, then I grabbed the big teddy bear so I could hide my face.I ran out of the room. I just kept on running.

    Edward always kept me as a secret. He never told me why. I think it is because of my age, and he is scarred what his fans and other people would think of him. I hate being his secret. Ed paints it as a fun, between us only game, and to make up for everything, buys me a lot of gifts. He might love me, but I cannot take the feeling of him being ashamed of me. It hurts me so bad sometimes. And when he told me that I could not even go to Russia it self to see him during my birthday really hurt me.

You might think it is nothing to cry about, but I am crying. These are the things that get me thinking if he ever loves me. I should never have a doubt in my mind that he does, but it is hard to remeber that when we are always sneeking around all the time. I could never be in public with him, ever. And it never happened before, and it won't till I am at least 20. I just know. He might give off the impression that 18 is good, but he really does not want peole to call out the teen dating the young adult.

I find my self out side of the building, and I just run to my car as fast as I could. When I get there, I strggle to open my car door, I do not want Ed to see me like this, and I do not want to see Ed right now. I throw the big teddy bear to the parking lot floor and then I open my car door. I jump in it and drive as fast as I can. I don't stop until I realized that I drove myself into a busy high way, backed up with traffic, that is when I hear my phone buzz. I open the text message. It was from Ed.

'I know that I am busy this week, and that would probably be our last jam setion for a while. Pleaz just don't be mad or sad, Max I love you.' Ed texted me.

I did not text back, he would have know that I have checked it because of the message it sends his phone if texts or mail was even looked at. I know he would be hurt, but I do not care right now. All I want to do is curl up on a couch and never leave that spot.

     I finally get home, as soon as I walk into the house, my mom asked how my day was.(she has no idea about Ed.) I ignore her and run upstairs to my bed room, lock the door and fall alsleep.


When I wake up, I notice that the time is 9:45pm. Did I only fall asleep for only a couple of hours. I turn on my phone and see a bunch of texts from my mom and Edward. All my mom's texts are aking if I was okay, if I was still alive, if I would unlock the door. All I do is text back no, and that I am fine. Then I notice the date of my moms texts. It says '1 day ago' at the bottom of the text. I have slep for a whole day, I would never be able to go to sleep now! I think. Wait, unless....

     I grab some sleeping pils from the top of my closet. I usually use them for when I am really sick and just can't seem to go to sleep at all. The instuctions on the back say.....

1. Take 1 pill for a 12 hour sleep, 2 for a 16 hour sleep, and 3 for a 20 hour sleep.

2. once chosen your amount, take with water and swallow.

WARNING: If   blah blah blah blah!  I think to myself.

I put down the bottel for a second, and went to my bathroom to go take a shower. Once done, I put on some PJs. I fill up a cup with some tap water and think: okay, if 1 gives you 12 hours and then 3 gives you 20................ maybe about 20 will last me until my birthday is over.

I do not know why I am this upset over Ed, I usually don't do this. I guess it is just the stress of the future proposal and....... oh god! I just remebered something that would probably bother me for the rest of my life. I just said yes to Ed's future proposal. How? I played the guitar pick, I was not suppose to do that! Uhhhh... that is why he was smiling so much! I hate myself even more for promising something that I did not even mean. I completely forgot that wearing it, is not the way you say yes. Ohh god, the guilt is just eating me up!

I need a break from ALL OF THIS! I do not want to kill myself, or cut, or bearn myself, or bleach my skin. No, hurting myself is never the answer and does not help to any extent. That only makes me cry harder because that reminds me of what Ed said to me one day. He is right.

But he never ever said anything about a temporary break. No. I put down the glass of tap water on the dresser right next to the bottel of sleeping pills, then I close the bottel. I hop back in my bed and just try to fall asleep, it is a bit late so I guess there is no point in staying up, I think to my self.

I JUST CAN NOT FALL ASLEEP! I give up and take the bottel of sleep pills and just keep on taking one then sipping water, than swallowing, not keeping count of how many I take. I lost count after 25. I reatch for another pill, but I see that the bottel is now empty. I strugged it off and finished the rest of my water. before I know it, I pass out and drop the glass on the floor.

~WARNING: If taken more than 4 in the same hour, you may have permenet memorie loss.


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