I'm Slowly Going Nuts

Okay, this is sort of a humor movella (or humour, if you're not American) about me. This is all about why people think I'm crazy.
And I guess I am.


3. A little bit of a quickie

Okay this is going to be quick because it is like late and stuff...

So. "People That Make Everything A Contest."

That is the topic of this night's rant.

I admit, that sometimes I can be a bit like this. But not usually. One of these offenders is my darling friend. Let's call her "Jane." (Which is not her name.)


So... it was very recently Halloween, as many of you know. And I went TOT (trick or treating) with my other friends. Not "Jane." And Jane went with her other friends. Not me.

We went in different neighborhoods, and the next day, Jane drifted over to me. "So, how much candy did you get?" she asked airily, as if she didn't care.

"About 130 pieces," I said.

Her eyes grew wide, and she laughed. "Really? That's, like, nothing. I got maybe 300. I got WAY more last year. Sucks for you!"


I have no words.

But I did then. So I said, "Good for you."

Jane said, "Wait, you don't even care? But I, like, got so much more than you."

I shrugged.

"Fine," she said. "Don't come crying to me when you're out of candy."

I now have three points to make:

1) I went TOT with my other friends, and we had fun, so why should I care?;

2) I wouldn't cry over candy. It's just weird;

3) I have siblings, who also went Trick or Treating. It's called STEALING.

So, Jane, you're still one of my BFFs. But--hard to understand, I know--I don't CARE how much candy I got. It is not a contest.

Candy rots your teeth anyway.

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