Moments - A Harry Styles Fanfic

One night when Olivia Howard hears her daughter crying she decides it's finally time to tell baby Darcy about her daddy who just happens to be Harry Styles. Read about how Olivia came to love the boy that we all love too. The heartbreak and happiness she shared with the curly haired boy.

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7. Feelings...



Chapter 7:

Feelings...

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**

"Did you like daddy?" Darcy asked and she smiled at me hoping for that one answer.

"Well you see, back then we couldn't like each-other. Do you understand?" I tried to say it in the simplest way possible.

She nodded but looked sad as she snuggled further into the white pillow she was lying on. I really don't think i'm going to get her asleep any time soon...

**



"I...I...we can't Harry...not after what I saw this morning...before anything happens with you and I, I need to find what's going on with our parents" I said regretting it straight away afterwards. He looked hurt and I felt the exact same way. Why does my life have to be so complicated?

"I totally agree with you...I just don't want to..." He said sadly and I nodded. "I know let's just be...friends...for the moment anyway"

Harry then climbed out of the car and opened the car door for me like the gentleman he is. I'm just glad things aren't weird between us. I smiled and got out of my side.

He quickly unlocked the door to his medium sized house which last night held one of the worst and best moments of my life.I cannot even describe the mess before us...

I have to admit even though the house looked like a bomb had hit it, I couldn't help but think how much I didn't want to run into Gemma. I don't think I could face her yet. I'm still not sure if she knew I was Skye's girlfriend or not...

Harry walked in after me and immediately groaned as he tugged on his hair. I tapped his back jokingly and said. "Come on bud, we're not going to get any work done while you're moaning" I smirked as I spoke and a small smile spread across his face.

"Ok i'll do downstairs and you do upstairs ok?" Harry asked me as I looked around the house. "But what if people did dirty stuff upstairs" I made a disgusted face as I spoke and over-exaggerated a shudder of my back. "So you're saying you would rather clean the kitchen where there is a lovely pile of vomit?" He asked. "Good point, see you when i'm done" I pointed my finger at him and sprinted up the stairs with a plastic bag for rubbish.

Upstairs wasn't nearly as bad as dpwnstairs where there was plastic cups, drink stains, vomit, wrappers and even cigarette butts. There were though a few things that I would have preferred not to see so early in the day....i'm not going to mention them, all i'm going to say is that I found these 'things' in a bedroom....

I put on a pair of rubber gloves and started picking up the rubbish just as Gemma sleepily shuffled out of her room. I froze on the spot. What do I say? Or do?The second she saw me she froze too.

Wow this is awkward...."Livvy i'm so sorry" A look of guilt and genuiness in her eyes as she spoke. "I had no idea you were Skye's girlfriend. I never would have done it. You know that right?" I could feel the lump appearing once again in my throat and the tears began to fill my eyes but I refused to let them fall. I nodded and she came over and wrapped her arms around me. "I'm so so sorry Livvy. Forgive me?" She asked kindly and I nodded once again. She told me that she wanted a girls day out with me today so after I cleaned up we would go shopping which I haven't done in quite a while.

I went back into the room I was cleaning and continued what I was doing.

An hour later and the entire house would spotless. In fact you would think instead of a party, a maid came and cleaned it. That's how much of a good job we did. Harry and I tried to high-five in the air in sow motion which didn't exactly work but we did it because we're cool like that...

Gemma was still getting dressed and I was waiting downstairs with Harry. He had apparently made plans with some guys from school so at least I wasn't ditching him.

Harry and I were sitting across from eachother at his kitchen table when the hall door opened and in walked both my dad and his mom. I could taste the awkwardness in the room. Harry decided he would try and thicken it by coughing a couple of times. I struggled to hold in my laughter but all that was happening was my face was turning redder and redder from holding it in.

"So this was who you were out with last night?" I asked with a fake smile not mentioning this morning's 'encounter'. Harry was trying to stop laughing behind me but I ignored him as I waited for an explanation.

"I...uhh...yeah Livvy." My dad answered as he put his arm around Anne. Ok there's really no chance of me and Harry getting together now...there goes my hopes and dreams... "Anne is my girlfriend" Yup there goes my heart shattered into at least a billion pieces...

I could once again feel tears threatening to fall but there is no way I would show my dad that I was upset by this. "That's.....great" I said as I ran out of the room. I can't pretend I don't like him anymore....I can't.

I ran out onto the street and sat on the edge of the road where I buried my head in my hands and just cried. I cried out the feelings I have been feeling for Harry ever since I first met him, but nothing seemed to work. Why couldn't mum be here?....to help me through this....she always knew what to do...

*1 WEEK LATER*

My dad and Anne have been dating for the past week and she's either at my house or it's the other way around, constantly. I have no peace. There all lovey dovey with each-other and it only makes me feel worse. I've tried forgetting and moving on but nothing seems to work. I've been trying to avoid Harry and only talk to him when absolutely essential, instead i've been spending most of my time with either Gemma or Andy. Gemma turned out to be an amazing friend to me. We didn;t end up going shopping that day last week but we went on Wednesday and had a really great time.

Anyway it's Monday so my weekend is over and it's time for stinky school. That's right I just said stinky. I pulled myself out of bed and stepped into the hot shower water. I didn't get much sleep last night for reasons that sit in the next room (if you know what I mean) and I was literally exhausted. I looked at myself in the mirror after my shower and saw the grey bags under my eyes, my bloodshot eyes and my usually tanned skin was pale. I dragged my hands down my face and began getting to work on trying to look in some way normal.

I walked into my room to find an outfit to wear for today and settled on skinny jeans, a denim shirt with a navy slip, and a pair of navy high-top converse. I tied my hair in a messy bun and started on my make-up.

Finally I look remotely normal! My skin was now it's usual colour and I had managed to cover up my bags and dark circles. After that I jogged downstairs to get some breakfast as I usually do every morning. As usual since the last week, Anne was sitting at my kitchen table with sex hair. It's not that I have anything against her, I don't in fact she's really nice. I just hate how much time there spending together. It keeps bringing my mind back to Harry. It hurts to think about him...

I breifly shot them a quick 'Hi' and continued finding something to eat. I found a banana and some orange juice. It will do. I chugged the orange juice and pulled off the banana peel so I could eat it while walking. I said goodbye to the to of them and left them to it...

I lef the house locking it after me as I knew they wouldn't do it and walked to the bus stop where Andy was waiting for me. I moved here two weeks ago yesterday and it still doesn't properly feel like home. Sure i've got a few close friends but some of those girls in school just despise me...

"Hey!" I greeted Andy cheerfully as I met her at the number:37 stop. She smiled at me and we talked for a little before it was time to climb on. I payed the driver and sat at my now designated seat. The second last row from the back by the window and Andy sat beside me.

We reached the school as the ten minute warning bell rang and I headed to my locker. I grabbed the books I needed for music, english, maths and science. Harry was in three of those classes so I once again had to talk to him and hurt myself even more than I already am...

I shut my locker and started walking to Music. The door was open so I walked in to find everyone else already there. Luckily the teacher hadn't yet arrived. I took my seat next to Harry and took out my books.

"Hey Liv" He smiled down at me and I smiled fakely at him. "Hi" I simply replied and he looked taken aback. "What's been up with you these past couple of days?" Harry asked getting slightly annoyed. "You've been completely avoiding and ignoring me!" He complained a little louder but it was still a whisper.

"Look Harry i'm sorry ok. Just drop it." I said sternly and flipped my book to the right page as Mr. Whitmore strolled in late to class. I rolled my eyes as he started speaking about some weird field trip we will be going on. At that moment I really couldn't care less. The lesson was like watching grass grow. It practically bored me to tears not being able to have my little conversations with Harry.

The second the bell rang I literally sprinted out of class to English making sure no-one spoke to me as I could feel myself getting emotional again. I swear to god, my hormones right now!

Lunch came seriously slowly and I met Andy as she didn't have science with me. She looked extremely happy so I asked her why.

"Sam asked me to be his girlfriend!" She squealed causing near deafness in my ears. I blocked my ears while she had a little screaming session with herself. I put on the fake smile that was now beginning to appear everywhere just like it used to. Harry is the only one who can change that...

"That's so great Andy! I'm so happy for you!" I lied. I can't be happy for her. Everyone seems to be happy apart from me...

We walked into the canteen together, Andy had a massive grin spread across her face and I looked like I wanted to die. As usual the popular kids were in the middle of the hall where everyone could watch them eat, but something was different today. Something that basically ripped my heart apart over and over just to make it hurt more. Something that I will never orgive him for.

Harry was snogging the face off some brunette girl. My tray containing my lunch dropped to the ground as I burst out crying. I heard everyone laugh after the deafening silence of when my tray dropped. Holly was the one to start it all as she shouted horrible things at me.

I ran. Ran as fast as I could all the way to my house. I don't even know how long it took. I just needed to get out of there. I can't go back. There's no way. I stormed in the hall door as an alarmed Anne and my dad asked why I was home so early. I ignored them as I knew what I had to do to get this pain away. I hadn't done this in months. Not since my mum died.

I went to the kitchen and opened the cutlery drawer. I pulled out the razor sharp knife and brought it to my room...

**

I had forgotten to not mention this and my toddler looked up at me with alarmed eyes as she looked like she was about to cry.

"What did you do with the knife mommy?" Her lower lip was quivering and my eyes began to water as I thought of that horrible day.

"Don't worry baby, it was nothing" I lied as I pulled up the sleeve on my pyjama top and saw the scars that I still have to hide today...

I squeezed my wrist as I looked at Darcy who was looking at me with concern. She looked so grown up with that look on her face. It scared me.

**

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