When You Believe

'Okay, Ana, you can do this' I whispered to myself as i stood backsatge, totally ingoring what was being said to me, helplessly fidgetting with the corner of my pale blue t-shirt. 'Here I go!'

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2. Tears

I leaned against the wall of the hall, slowly slid down against it until i reached the floor beneath me. I could feel the tears slowly fill my eyes, drip down my cheeks, and i tried my hardest not to cry out loud. I hugged my knees and buried my head in them. Sob after sob, my emotions swam out like mad, leaving nothing behind. Get yourself together, Ana! I grabbed my phone.

'Grandma?'

'Damn it, Ana, are you crying? You never cry!' Thanks alot. I was hoping for a cheer-up like 'you did great' or something. Anything at all! 'What happened? Tell me every single detail!' She beamed at me through the receiver. Isn't she gonna ask why I'm crying!?

'Well...' I began, 'I sang, I was mad at myself for giving a wimpy first impression, and then they...'

Tears built up in my dark green eyes as I pressed my lips together in order not to start crying all over again. No. Not in front of Grandma. She's all I have, I can't wimp out like that in front of her. I shut my eyes tight, and let my lips go. Breathe in, breathe out. Everything's fine...

'Hello? Ana, honey, you still there?' I answered with a silent sob, hoping she didn't hear it.

'Okay, I'm guessing you are. Look, I suppose your upset because they didn't accept you, but...' What on earth is she talking about? I'm not upset, I'm just out of control. Who said they didn't accept me? The audience went mad! I was never as nervous as I am right now, I can't control myself! A tiny smile escaped my lips...

'Grandma? I got three fucking yes's!'

 

 

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