Too Close ~ (One Direction Not Famous)

Sophie and Niall have been best friends for years. But at the start of year 11, Sophie sees something different in him. Not only must Sophie cope with her own runaway feelings but she also has to try to keep up with the crazy lives of her other friends.

Will anything ever be simple?


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5. Why Me, Why Now?

 

Niall was to one side of the corridor and he wasn’t alone. In fact he was far from it. He and some random girl I didn’t recognise were kissing. Actually, kissing doesn’t quite cover it. It was more violently making out.

                She was up against the wall with her fingers knotted in his hair and he had his arms around her waist, trying to pull her closer to him. Like that was possible. I felt as if I had been punched in the stomach. By a boxer. Twice. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t think straight and I couldn’t move. My head was a mess of tangled thoughts: Who was she? Why didn’t he tell me? I was so stupid to assume he was single. I was completely rooted to the spot, unable to tear my eyes away from one of the most upsetting things I had ever seen.

                A door slammed in the distance causing them to untangle themselves, giggling. Then they looked up, straight at me. “Soph!” said Niall, his voice a mixture of surprise, confusion and embarrassment. I just stood there, still incapable of movement, like a rabbit in headlights.

                The silence lasted a couple of seconds too long to be comfortable before the girl coughed. I looked at her properly for the first time and realised that I did recognise her. I guess I just hadn’t been able to see her properly when her face was mushed up against Niall’s. Her name was Gemma I think, and she was in the year below. We had never spoken but I am pretty sure we were Facebook friends. She was extremely pretty with golden curls and green eyes. She was wearing very little make up but still managed to lower my self-esteem, just by standing in the same vicinity as I was.  I felt another tug of pain as I realised that between her and me, there was no competition. Any guy would go for her over me. And the guy I wanted had.

                “Are you ok?” Niall asked, taking a step towards me and sounding genuinely concerned. I mumbled something along the lines of “never been better” before turning on my heel ad walking as quickly as possible towards the closest exit. All I knew was I had to get out of there. By the time I stepped out into the fresh air, the tears had started. It was like a knee-jerk reaction. Not wanting anyone to see my tear-streaked face in case they asked me what was wrong. That was definitely something I definitely didn’t need. I kept my eyes firmly on the ground letting my hair create a curtain between me and the rest of the world.

                It took me the entire walk home to calm my thoughts down but as I reached my front door, the ears were still relentless. I let myself in, although not without some difficulty. Through a combination of the cold, anger and shock I was shaking which didn’t exactly make getting the key in the door particularly easy.

                I embraced the warmth of my home and charged up the stairs. Thankfully, both my parents worked late. The tears were gradually slowing now as I grabbed my bag to try and find my iPod. Loud music was the best way to bock unwanted thoughts. I out it on shuffle and waited for the first song to come on. It was “Drop in the Ocean” by Ron Pope. Definitely not the mood lifting tune I was after. Irritated, I pressed skip. “You Belong With Me” by Taylor Swift started playing. Tears ricked my eyes as I realised how appropriate this song had become. Was my iPod determined to depress me further? I pressed next once again. Big mistake…

                “You light, the skies up above me…” it was “Rule the World” by Take That. It was mine and Niall’s song. When it was first released, Niall had been over at mine, baking cakes, if you could call it that: the kitchen was a mess, flour, butter and eggs all over the worktops and ourselves! We were mucking around, flicking the last bits of the mixture at each other and laughing like maniacs when it came on over the radio and he started singing absentmindedly. I stopped whatever I was doing and listened, jaw open. He had an amazing voice. I told him so there and then and ever since he had started taking singing more seriously. And from that moment on, “Rule the World” kind of became ‘our song’ and usually, it made me feel better.

                Unfortunately, this time, it only managed to remind me of what I most wanted to forget, bringing on a fresh round of tears. I remembered his eyes, his hair, his voice and the way he hugged me, only making me cry harder. Just as I got over one thing, a whole load of other memories would resurface, each more painful than the last.

                Accepting defeat, I just curled up on my bed and cried until my eyelids grew heavy and sleep took over…

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