Shiver

This is a Twilight slow moving (realistic) slash Alice/Bella fic.

"I ran harder and faster, there was something inside of me that was urging me to drive myself to the fullest, something inside of me that wanted an out…And so I let it."Wolf Bella, Shiftier Quileutes,Vampire Cullens. Follow Bella as she battles to become apart of society again after an unthinkable change happens in her life.You wont find anything like this elsewhere, I guarantee it. **RATED R FOR SAFE REASONS**

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4. Mind Over Load

 

Bella

We stayed at the ocean for a good 3 hours before Ciar came to me begging for food. I didn’t feel comfortable with letting him hunt in the forest alone considering the elder told me of the other territory just beyond the river, so I brought him back to Sam’s house to find jarred in hopes that he still had that raw meat he offered earlier.

Oh, so now the crybaby wants food” jarred said once I found him.

“Don’t get frustrated with him, he’s still just growing” I replied slight annoyed; I too needed some food in my stomach.

“I didn’t me anything by it, the amount of food that we consume caused us to get another refrigerator and two freezers. “He laughed “I put the meat in the fridge outside, it’s this way”

I followed him out the door and Ciar followed along. We were led to a shed not 200 feet from the back of the house. It was completely run down. There were shackles missing on the roof and there were holes in the walls that windows were meant to be placed but were covered by large sheets of plastic.

“Don’t mind the windows” jarred said “we had a pretty bad storm late winter and haven’t been able to get new windows placed.” He led us inside and we passed by an old red truck with a guy trying to get it started.

“That’s Jacob;” the guy name Jacob waved, and I gave a small wave back “he’s a car fanatic, fixing up cars and stuff. It’s his hobby and weakness. Best not to talk to him right now though, considering that it’s the 5th day that he’s been trying to get that junk started, he’s got a horrible temper when things don’t go his way. We walked around a corner to an open room with a cutting table and 2 large freezers and a large refrigerator.

“We go hunting every weekend and store the deer in here. “He motioned to all of the storage areas. “Everything is usually frozen, so if you want something you’ll have to pull it out at least a day before so it can defrost properly.”

“Okay, “ I replied.  

“Here’s a thigh, do you think you’ll need more? Hey!” Ciar went and grabbed the thigh out of Jared’s hand and ran out the door. 

“Don’t mind him, he has no table manners. Do you have a shoulder? “

“Yeah, it’s right here” he pulled it down from the top self.  “We have got every shelf labeled, for the dunderheads like Jacob who doesn’t understand anything besides car stuff.”

I giggled, he handed the shoulder to me, I had no idea if, while I was a human, the meat would or wouldn’t make me sick. So I smelled it to see if it seemed appealing and it did, my mouth started watering.  I licked it, testing how I would handle it. It was amazing, I started eating it right there. When I finished I realized that jarred wasn’t there and Jacob was using tools under the truck.   I walked to the truck.

“Uh, hi?” I said uncertainly. I heard something hit flesh and then metal hitting the ground.

“Shit!” the voice yelled as he rolled from under the car “What do you want?” he snapped

I was greeted by a teenage boy with moderately long hair.

“Do you know where I can find Sam?”

He rolled his eyes and started to return back under the truck. “How should I know?”

My left eyebrow rose on its own accord. I let out a small sigh and walked past him, but not before I told him.

“Why don’t you just go online to figure out why your truck won’t start? You do know the internet wasn’t made for you get off on car porn right?” he grunted as I stepped over his legs. I went outside to see Ciar not 20 feet away gnawing on the bone of his finished thigh piece. 

I told him sarcastically “don’t choke” in reply he did a fake cough and continued to gnaw on his treat. “use your nose to find me then.” I told him as I continued on my way to find Sam. I had satisfied my hunger and now I needed to satisfy my curiosity.

I walked back into the only house I knew and saw the same boy who was covered in mud earlier, but was now clean. He was lying on the couch and tilted his head back when he heard the screen door close behind me.

“Hello!” he said excitedly, he stood up and walked to me.

“Hiya.” I replied, when we made eye contacts something happened. It was a feeling that came over me as if I made this subconscious mental connection to him. Like I knew that he was going to be in my life one way or another. It wasn’t a romantic attraction nor was it a physical attraction at that, but it’s a feeling that I can’t explain.

“My name’s Seth.” He had the same big smile in in place that he did when we crossed paths earlier today.

“Bella” I told him.

“Old Billy here says you’re an honorary guest to the rez, how about I show you around sometime?” he asked innocently.

“Sure thing,” I said with a smile. It was weird; his smile seemed to be contagious. “Do you know where I can find Sam? He’s supposed to explain something to me.”

“Oh yea, last I saw he was walking to the beach, I think he was looking for you too.” 

“Okay thanks.” I smiled once more at him and made my way back to the beach. It didn’t take me long to see his large body walking along the water’s edge. I called out to him.

“Hey Sam!”

“Bella! I was looking for you.  I went to find jarred to ask where you were but he couldn’t seem to hold anything down in his stomach.” he was walking over to meet me half way.

“Oh, haha” I started sheepishly “I forgot he was there when I started eating.”

“Don’t worry about it, he’s a wuss when it comes to being around raw meat.” He laughed “come on I found a long piece of drift wood that we can sit on while we talk” he said and started walking in the said direction. 

“We are direct descendants of our ancient elders,” he started “who were true children of the moon; they fled Italy when the vampires there started to slaughter our kind like pigs. Our elders were the lucky ones to flee Italy and moved here, all of the other children of the moon that stayed behind where murdered.”

“Holy crap.” I injected. He looked over to me and continued.

“Only families that are direct descendants to the ancients can turn at will. But it wasn’t always like that. The only generation before ours to be able to change at will is our current elders. Everyone before that turned on a full moon. But every generation after our ancients were much more human with every full moon. They were able to contain their blood lust. Not long after that it was found that as a pack we could communicate within our minds. Ever since this discovery we are not allowed to marry anyone in the pack, or anyone who has the gene in them. This rule is only void if our imprint happens to be a wolf as well.”

“What’s imprinting?” I asked, we had made it to the drift wood that looked like it was half of a tree trunk but was completely bleached by the sun and salt water.

"Imprinting is all about companionship. All of us wolves have one; just not all of us will find them considering now that there are over a trillion of human beings around the world. There are two types of imprint, romantic and platonic; both are equally as strong and binding. The basic instinct you would have towards either type is to love and protect. A romantic imprint would be the love of your life, your Soul-mate. Some people worry that the love the wolf feels isn't real and is more like obligation for the wolf but that's far from the truth. Although the feelings are jump-started by a greater force, they are very much real for both wolf and imprint.  Consider it as a push in the right direction.  When it’s a romantic imprint is not in a sense, ‘you are my soul mate’ at first site, it’s more of a ‘I know you’re going to be in my life and you are really attractive.’ The boys and I call it a crush on steroids, except it’s much more serious than that.” He laughed and then took a breath.

 “With a platonic imprint it’s more like the love you'd have for a younger sister or brother. Your need to protect that person will be your most primal instinct. Both wolf and imprint will know at the moment the imprinting takes place, although the imprint won't know exactly what’s happened, just that they suddenly feel connected to the wolf. Unfortunately sometimes the imprint brushes it off completely and is frightened when they have such odd emotions, to where they will try their best to avoid the wolf completely, which eventually leads both imprint and wolf completely miserable. It is recorded that both participants die from severe depression if they cannot come to terms with the imprinting.”

“Are you serious?” I asked bewildered.

“Unfortunately yes, we lost a great line of wolves because of this. It was the other beta of our elders pack.” He said solemnly. But he continued anyways.

  “All in all, the wolf will see a mate or sibling when they look at their imprint. And the imprint will either see a lover or protector. There has never been a case in our records where both had ever occurred, it is either romantic or platonic never a mixture. But as you have so proven with your two years of being a wolf we have much to learn of our ever developing kind."

“Hmm, I see.” I shifted in the drift wood, my bum was going numb. : have you found your imprint?” I asked.

“I have” he replied with a goofy love struck grin. “you can meet her next week if you like? She’s on vacation in California right now with her cousins.”

“I would love to.” I said with a smile. And he smiled back.

“So right now you’re the alpha of this three man pack?”

As of right now I am but I’m not the true alpha of this pack. I am the beta, along with my ancestors were. If the line of the true alpha is dead or hasn’t come to age to change the beta takes charge.”

I understand that, it’s the same as my pack in Canada. I was a beta by size and because the alphas accepted me so. But I never took position as alpha, I didn’t want that responsibility. “Who is supposed to be the alpha then?” I asked

“Jacob black, he has yet to phase but all of the signs are there. He’s quick to anger, going off on his own for hours at a time without telling anyone. His body structure is also changing but he doesn’t notice it. Right now as you’ve noticed it’s only a 3 wolf pack, there are 6 blood lines that are still active. The reason besides the fact that I am a beta for me to be Alpha is because I changed first. Paul shifted not long after I and jarred was the last to change just a month ago.”

“Wow, that’s exactly what I went through, besides the body structure, I think so anyways.” I flexed my bicep and showed it to Sam, who in response laughed and showed his gun. I pouted “no fair, you’re a guy.” 

“True, but as a wolf your human form should be as strong as your wolf form, you can’t always be dependent on that side of you to save your life.” He spoke seriously.

“fine okay, but I don’t want to get beefy like you, that’s gross.” I stuck my tongue out in distaste

He laughed “no, no you don’t have to. This is just my choice. The other boys are beefy because I took them to the gym to work off their anger before they turned; now they have competitions to see who can do the most reps.” 

“Okay good.” Satisfied with his answer. “ So who are the others that are meant to be wolfs too?”

“All we’re missing is Jacob, quill and Embry, Jacob’s best friends. They’re much more closer to changing then Jacob is actually so you will see then around more often as myself and the elder try to help them prepare for what is about to happen to them. Sadly this means that they spend less time with Jacob which isn’t helping his mood swings.”

So that’s why he was so upset, I mused.

“the elders and I fear that Seth is actually going to phase as well, he’s not as quick tempered as as Jacob but he has the early signs. His body temperature has been increasing very fast, soon his body with start filling out and his anger won’t be getting any better.”

“Hmm.” I acknowledged letting him know I was listening. “What happens if he does phase?”

Before he could answer we heard a couple of familiar barks coming from the left of us. It was Ciar, he was finally done with his bone and had found us. He came up to us and made himself comfortable by my feet. I ran my fingers through his black coat a couple of times as my hello to him.

“If Seth does change he will be the youngest of our tribe to do so. He is also the most unlikely candidate to change. The Clearwater’s are not, to the records knowledge at least, to be a part of the ancient line. There was actually a rumor going around 9 years ago that one of our elders was sleeping with sue before he found his imprint. But according to the record sue belongs to a respected blood line that the gene died out 2 generations back. But because it has been dead for so long no one wants to believe it could possibly be reawakened.”

“Wow Sam, this is. Well… this is a lot to take in. Can I go for a walk and then find you later? I’ll go show Ciar where the boundary line is while I’m at it. My head is just hurting with all of this right now. I get it all that you’ve told me, really. I just need it to let it set.” All that Sam told me was swimming in my head, what if I’m like Seth and I belonged to a long line of a supposed dead gene. And that connection that I had with Seth was that an imprint or was it completely different? I just needed to walk all of this was becoming a little bit too much for me to handle.

“Of course, if you’re not in by tomorrow morning we might send a rescue team out for you, he laughed trying to lighten up the mood. I just nodded and stood, Ciar followed. I lead Ciar to the woods as we began our silent walk.

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