Call Me Crazy ( A janoskians fan fiction)

Haven Lauren McLain is not your regular bad ass; in fact she is way worst. After getting sent to the principals office for the sixtieth time, and getting expelled, Haven is sent to live with one of her mothers closest friends in Australia. Haven is one tough cookie to crumble, but when her mother tells her this she freaks out.... Or does she? Haven loves the Brooks brothers, and if anything wants nothing more than to go and live it up with them in Australia. But what if things aren't all that their cracked up to be? For example, what if it just so happens that the brother, who she just so happens to hate, is forced to go with her? What happens when the vacation of a lifetime, comes washing down the drain? What if the only person you've ever fallen in love with, doesn't love you back. Read to find out whom, when, and why, Haven's life has just turned into the worst roller coaster on the planet.


2. There Goes My Dignity



I was for sure the unluckiest person on this damn planet. You want to know why? Well for starters, you could say that I was feeling great about getting to reunite with the Janoskians, but what I wasn’t feeling great about was having to hear that my brother was coming with me. My mother thinks I’m like six years old, which maybe mentally I am, but it doesn’t mean that I need a freaking baby sitter. My brother and I don’t even speak more than two words to each other when we are in the same room. Okay, let me rephrase that. My brother and I can’t last in the same room without one of us lashing out on the other. So basically, my dear mother was sending us both of so we could kill one another. It’ll be like the Hunger Games, Survival to the fittest beats nasty little prick, which in this case I’m of course the fittest.

Your probably saying that I’m a conceited little bitch, but in the words of Rihanna, “Suck my cockiness, and Lick my persuasion”. I could really care less of what other people think of me, and my out going personality. I’m the type of person that doesn’t rub things in peoples face, but also likes to enjoy all the good that they have. If I’m pretty, I’ll say that I’m pretty, and everybody should believe that their pretty… Unless you’re my brother. Looks wise, my brother was a handsome young lad, but let the son of bitch even speak one weird, and he turns completely unattractive. It had been four hours since my mother had told me the breaking news, and now I was being sent to pack up all of my stuff. Clearly, my mother had planned this trip because not many people keep tickets to Australia handy in their pockets.

What if I would have said no? It would have been a waste of her damn money, that’s what it would have been. I love my mother to death, but she really does need to improve on speaking before she acts.

“My mother doesn’t love me, she wants to get rid of me. My mother doesn’t care that Luke’s an ass, she’s sending him to do the task, of taking care of little old me, the only daughter of you dreams!!!” I sang these lyrics at the top of my lungs. I just came up with them in my head, but even so they weren’t too bad.


I hummed the remaining of my song, and “quietly” packed my things. Nothing is ever done quietly when I do it, anybody who’s spent even just an amount of five minutes around me would know that. Any ordinary person would have been possibly as quiet as a mouse when packing, but here I am making a game out of the whole damn thing. It’s called basket suitcase, I roll my clothes as I fold them, and then I shoot them into the suitcase from the far corner. Mind you, that every point gained deserves a happy dance, which meant that the down stairs department was feeling my wrath also. I could teach you my happy dance if you’d like, but I’m afraid it would be way too difficult, only a g like me could pull it off. I’m just kidding, it’s quite simple really. All it takes is faith, trust, and nope not pixie dust, but it takes a lot of noise. What I basically do is I stomp my feet, wail like an idiot, and do whatever stupid dance move I could think of.  If you need a demonstration, don’t expect me to give you one that would be too much of a privilege coming from moa.

After finishing up my little game, I was beginning to feel almost bored. My eyes danced over to my now empty closet, as an idea began to form into my head. I was going to find narnia bitches. No really, I was about to go find Narnia. When I was younger I was the type of kid who could be given a cardboard box, and turn it into a damn mansion.

I was going to need a wand for this, and maybe some magic chalk. I glanced over to my nightstand, and picked up a small baton. As for my magic chalk, I’ll just use the dry erase ones I once used to give a makeover to the little girls next door all white, wooden play house. I know, how cruel of me to do that to a helpless little girl, but I swear the little rat is a major B-I-T-C-H, and I’ll spell it out just so it sounds less mean. Grabbing my “magical” equipment, I headed straight for the forest. I drew a big tree on my closet wall, and a detailed little cottage. Man, hate to float my own boat, but I’m seriously freaking beast at drawing. I was in the middle of bringing my painting to life, when the wicked witch walked into my lair.

“Who goes there?” My voice boomed, and it took me all that I had not to laugh.


“Haven, where are you?”

“I’m afraid that I am in the magical land of Narnia, and Haven can no longer be reached” I paused. “So leave a message after the tone… beeeeeep!”


“In other words, your in your closet” She said barging into my magical land.


“Why couldn’t you just go along with my craziness for once?” I pleaded.


“It’s not normal for a teenage girl to be talking about visiting Narnia from their closet, and drawing on their walls with chalk”


“You are no fun” I stuck my tongue out at her, but only before I could get smacked upside the head.


“Mothers are not supposed to be fun”


“Cool mothers are,” I muttered under my breath, but when she heard I turned up to smile at her. “ What I meant was, of course mothers are supposed to be mean nasty ogres, who torment their daughters dreams”


“Very funny” she said letting out a dry cackle. “Any way, your leaving tomorrow at six, so you should probably be getting some rest”


“Mom, I got this,” I said impersonating, George Lopez.


“One more hour Haven” She warned me with a dangerous look, which I dared to mock.


“Fun sucker!!” I yelled out to her as she left my room.


“Weirdo!!” Was all I heard before the door slammed, and I busted out laughing.


Tell me something I don’t know, she’s going to have to come harder than this if she wants to see me cry. I haven’t cried in years, and that’s how I plan on keeping it. I usually never obey my mother, but at the moment I could feel myself shutting down. To say the least a girl who always active, does get tired at the end of the day. The asshole (AKA the boy who I’m forced to share the same genes with) was supposedly coming to pick me up really early tomorrow. I swear if he so much as says one word to me that pisses me the fuck off, I’m going to murder him. Okay, so maybe that’s a bit harsh, but don’t expect that I won’t beat him either.

Now, I’m about to sing a song that really gets you going to sleep. It’s kind of, sort of, a small little lullaby I made when I was younger.


“There is a man under your bed, and in you closet, don’t you want to say hello. There is an elf, and a sneaky little grinch, hiding all the way below. Close your eyes if you don’t want to get kid napped, and maybe than you’ll understand. Go to sleep, just go to sleep, stop worrying about the old hag… Down stairs” I sang this over and over, until after about ten minutes I was finally asleep.




Most people hate the mornings, but is it wrong to say that I actually like the mornings. I can’t help that I’m a freaking boss, and I wake up everyday feeling dang super-tastic. I really don’t enjoy the company of Betty buzz kills, whose only idea of fun is to play tag. I’d rather play by myself if the only fun in my town involves all things PG 13. Okay, let me rephrase that, I don’t play by myself literally. I strutted my way out of bed, and into my gigantic bathroom. As I showered, I rapped my favorite song by Drake, HYFR.  I may not be the most amazing singer, but I’m for sure one hell of a rapper. I’ll gladly take on Eminem any day of the week, and I’ll probably loose, but Id still have my confidence on check. It was just about 4:30 in the morning, which was just enough time for me to get ready.

My long electric blonde and pink hair hung low to my waist, and luckily I had managed to not get it wet. My hair had already practically looked bleached when I was born; so thanks to my mother and her gorgeous locks, no bleach was needed to get my hair white enough to add pink. I was surprised at how well my hair still looked though, and how silky it felt. I was for sure thinking that when I got this hair do done I was going to have a crispy mop to tame each and every day, but to tell you the truth I hardly ever have to worry about my hair. I wasn’t the type of girl that likes to cake on a lot of make up, and look like the fucking girl from the big red comfy couch. I only ever applied the minimal amount of make up, and that’s really all I’ll ever need. 


I chose to wear faded high waist studded jean shorts, a white sequined crop top, and my white converse high tops. I left my hair slightly curly and loose, which was its normal state. I applied a thin coat of liquid eyeliner, mascara, and some cherry lip balm. After giving myself a once over in the mirror, I had to stop myself from jumping at me. I looked way too hot for my own damn good, like I would totally do me if I were a dude. I smiled widely into the mirror, and then looked to the clock to see that it was already 5:30. Party Time!! , Yea right, I wish it was party time. I heard a loud knock on my door, and thought, it must be the asshole since my mother wouldn’t dare to know on a door like that.


“What the hell do you want, Luke?”


“You look like a slut in that outfit, do you know that?” He sneered.


“Oh totally, that’s the look I was going for. Glad to know that I fooled you, and a couple of your friends when I had them in bed last night” I smirked, watching his eyes grow wide.


“What ever” He muttered coldly. “Mom said for me to come and help you with your crap”


“Tell mom that I’d prefer that a real man come and do the job, I wouldn’t want to strain the so little muscles that you have” I winked at him slyly, and made my way over to my luggage.


I didn’t need this mofo to do the job for me; I could carry my freaking luggage down stairs by myself. I may be only five feet in height, but that didn’t mean that I was incapable. I know, I’m very short, which sometimes I hated, but than I admired it. Being short just made my curves pop out more, and made rocking heels that much more easier since it actually made a big difference when I wore them. I walked proudly by my brother, and smirked at him when I saw the surprised look on his face.

“Yup, that’s right, I don’t need your help to carry my shit”


It took me a while longer than it should have, but soon enough I was all ready to go. My mother, who by the way was crying hysterically, came up to me with a crooked smile.


“Haven, I’m going to miss you my honey bunches of oat” Her arms wrapped tightly around me, and for once I felt safe.


“I know mom, I know,” I said soothingly rubbing her back. “But like you said, it’s only for three months, and then you’ll get to see this hot piece of ass once again”


“Don’t say that word” She chuckled. “But you better get yourself together sooner than that, I don’t know if I’ll be able to cope with all this craziness not around” she said gesturing to me, and all my craziness.



“I’ll try,” I promised, but I wasn’t so sure I could keep it. “I love you mom, just don’t go finding a new man while I’m gone”


“I have your father” She playfully slapped my arm.



“Oh yea, I almost forgot about him” I mumbled under my breath.


I left my mother and Luke to share their goodbyes, before I practically dragged him into the car. Sometimes, I actually wished that my brother and I got along because then I’d have someone to have fun with. Of course, with a jerk brother like Luke, he made it nearly impossible to even share a civilized conversation with him. In as many ways possible we were the same, but I’d never admit that, to him anyways. We both like pulling pranks on people, embarrassing ourselves in public, and simply not giving a fuck about like itself. Whenever I tried to bond with the prick, he gave me the cold shoulder though, so I made it my official duty to treat him the same way he treats me.

As you could probably already tell, the ride to the airport was too damn awkward. The only noise being made was coming from the radio, which wasn’t even on a good channel anyway. So here’s the thing, when I get bored I get reckless, and when I get reckless it’s almost impossible to restrain me from acting out. I had my window rolled down, as did almost everyone else, so it was clear to me what exactly I needed to do.

I call this game Window riser, and the object is to say as many crazy things, and do as many crazy things, until you get the person to want to roll up their window. The first car was a red Honda Civic, and to my advantage the window was wide open, and the radio wasn’t even on. I poked my head out of the window, and began yelling gibberish.


“I like pussy…. Cats!!!” I yelled, getting the woman in the car to turn her head in my direction. “Do you like pussy… cats?”


I began to play peek a boo, which earned myself a glare. The girl was clearly starting to get annoyed, and that’s just what I wanted. Want to know who else was getting annoyed? The asshole was getting annoyed.


“Stop embarrassing yourself” He demanded, but like seriously why does he have to be such a dick?



“I’ll stop, but only when you stop”



“I don’t embarrass myself,” He protested, but clearly he hasn’t spent a day in the shoes of another person.


“How do you know, that I don’t know, that you already know, that what I know is what you know, and that what you know is what you know is a lie, and what I know about you is what is the truth?” I cocked my head to the side, and gave him a suspicious look.


“What the Fuck?” He said more asking himself, than me. Yup, I’ll admit I have a way with words, and other things of course.


“Your lucky we’re here because if not the game would have went on, and on, and on” 


“Your annoying” He muttered.


“How did you know? Did someone tell you my name without my permission? If you need any others, I also go by bitch, and screw up” I said proudly.


My brother stayed shut, which kind of sucks because then I didn’t have a reason to resume bothering him. I couldn’t wait to see the Brooks brothers, or just the whole Janoskians clan in general. Finally I would have people that actually knew how to have fun, and were not afraid to go wild in front of strangers. Taking my seat on the plane, I looked around to see where Luke had been taken. Luckily for me, Luke wasn’t too close, which allowed me to have a little bit of fun.  There was a guy seated to my right, and a young girl seated to my left. Both appeared to be entertained by their electronically devices, so I thought I’d be a menace, and do what the Janoskians taught me to do best. I began looking in on what the person to my left was doing, which didn’t seem too interesting by the way. At random occasions I would look up to her, and give her a creepy smile.


“That’s some god stuff” I lied, this shit was boring.


“Can you mind your own business, I really don’t appreciate you looking in on my stuff?” She said, with a thick Australian accent.


“I’m sorry, I just can’t help that your so pretty and I want to get to know you better” I smirked slyly, and winked at her watching as she uncomfortably shifted positions.


I leaned in close to her, and she stared at me in disgust. Her pale skin made it easy to see that she was getting red, and not like blushing red, but more like angry red.  I reached for her hand, but she quickly pulled it away.


“That’s it, I’m switching seats,” She said rising from her chair. Bingo, another win for Haven.


“Does that mean I don’t get your number?” I asked, faking disappointment.


By this time she had already stomped off, and now it was only chubby and me. I closed my eyes, and began to “snore” loudly.  I draped myself over his shoulder, feeling how he tried to be subtle when he shook me off. 


“No, don’t do it Jimmy!!’ I cried, still with my eyes remaining closed so it looked like I was asleep.


Falling back onto the mans shoulder, this time he shook me off more impolitely. I began to twitch, and pinch the man's arm.


“Ouch!” He screamed.


“Oh, my, gosh, did I do that sir?”  I said innocently.


“I’m sitting over there” He got up from his seat, and that was probably the last I’ll ever see of my cushion.


“Bye, I’ll miss you my soft little cushion” I said dreamingly.





After switching flights twice, we were finally almost there. Why, must it be so darn difficult to get to Melbourne, Australia? 


“Passengers, we will be arriving in Melbourne, Australia in two minutes” The lady in the box declared.


I immediately shot up from the uncomfortable position I was in. It had been nearly a day, and I was in desperate need of a shower. I didn’t stink, but I take my personal hygiene very seriously. I took out my compact mirror from my purse, took out a wipe, and began to slightly dab on my face. I reapplied some mascara and lip-gloss, and it was just at the right time. I was so going to have a major case of jet lag, but so long as I was having it in Australia, I could really care less. My brother had been awfully silent, which was weird because usually he would jump at the chance of being able to annoy me in public. I bit my tongue; I didn’t want to ruin this beautiful moment of silence between us.  Instead, my brother ruined the beautiful silence, and then I was pissed.


“Mrs. Brooks is going to pick us up, so keep your eye out for a black Audi” He mumbled, which left me a gape. My brother had actually spoken to me without being rude, and it was so weird.


I nodded my head in response, and received my luggage. I packed two suitcases, and a large duffle bag. My mom said if I needed anything else she would send it, and knowing me I’d probably take my whole room if I could. After about five minutes of looking, we finally saw a sign that said, McLain siblings. I scoffed, the McLain siblings… really?



“On my gosh, is that you Haven?” Mrs. Brooks asked dumbfounded.


“Yup” I said popping the P. “It’s me in the flesh”



I was going to keep my witty comments away from her for a while, only until she got used to me though. Mrs. Brooks was a pretty woman, who appeared to be very kind at heart. I was aching to ask her the question that was always running through my mind. How the hell do you handle those three boys? Of course, my mother handles me pretty well, so it’s possible.


“Hello Luke, it’s my pleasure to meet you” She said kindly. I hope she’s not expecting him to be all lovey in return, if that’s the case she’ll be very disappointed.



“Yea, I guess,” He mumbled.


“Excuse my jack ass of a brother, he’s not around woman enough to know how to treat a lady,” I whispered into her ear, causing her to chuckle.


“That’s quite okay”



After the greetings were all done, we all hopped into the car. I was said now because I knew I couldn’t pull any tricks with a mother here. I swear, I looked like a crack feign yearning to get her crack, except in this case it’s pranks. And most definitely public disturbance. The drive to her home was actually amusing being that Mrs. Brooks was really sweet, and funny to say the least. I got satisfaction out of seeing my brother being tortured with our girl talk. I made sure to throw in some sentences about period, and shit just to get on his nerves. Damn, my brother was going to make one awful husband. When we pulled into the drive way I almost caught myself jumping with joy.


“Are the boys home by any chance?”

“Yea, there in their room doing who knows what” She sighed, and I laughed.



Entering the house, their mother called out for them to come and help. I was anxious to see them, I mean come on, and I wasn’t going to deny the fact that they are all three fine mother fluffers. They all came walking out side of a room, and when they saw me their eyes popped. Jai had a sweet smile on his lips, Luke had on a grin, and Beau had on a devious smirk. I on the other hand, was biting my lip to keep myself from yelling out “Take me now!”


“Boys, Haven is going to be spending some time with us, so please don’t try to corrupt her” She pleaded. My mother must not have told her the reason I was sent here, I’m sure if she would have Mrs. Brooks would already know that I’ve been corrupted a long time ago.



“Hey boys” I smirked, and winked at them.


“We’re the Brooks brothers” they said unison.


“And I’m the girl whose about to rock your world” I said under my breath.


I was ready, for the vacation of a lifetime.


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