Call Me Crazy ( A janoskians fan fiction)

Haven Lauren McLain is not your regular bad ass; in fact she is way worst. After getting sent to the principals office for the sixtieth time, and getting expelled, Haven is sent to live with one of her mothers closest friends in Australia. Haven is one tough cookie to crumble, but when her mother tells her this she freaks out.... Or does she? Haven loves the Brooks brothers, and if anything wants nothing more than to go and live it up with them in Australia. But what if things aren't all that their cracked up to be? For example, what if it just so happens that the brother, who she just so happens to hate, is forced to go with her? What happens when the vacation of a lifetime, comes washing down the drain? What if the only person you've ever fallen in love with, doesn't love you back. Read to find out whom, when, and why, Haven's life has just turned into the worst roller coaster on the planet.


3. Meeting the Guys



Bucket List For My Visit With the Janoskians


-Act normal for a day (highly unlikely)

-Get chocolate wasted

-Knock a bitch out (Is that maybe too cruel?)

-Go streaking

-Fake an Australian accent for a day (I’m beast at accents)

-Be in a fail video!!

-Sleep with 1/3 of the Brooks brothers



I was so surprised to see that between all of this chaos, I could still bring myself to make a bucket list, freaking awesome bucket list might I add. I know it’s kind of short, but when living your life like the amazing Haven McLain, it’s really impossible to think of things you haven’t already done. The asshole, which I swear on my freaking imaginary kitty cat pussy Daniels, will be the death of me. I know, excuse me while I go kill myself for not having mentioned Pussy Daniels. Pussy Daniels is usually the one who I blame for the things that I do, and also this entire imaginary cat thing makes for good company.


The boys, who might I add are sex gods, haven’t said one word. Maybe I’m just that damn intimidating, but sheesh I don’t want to only have one way conversations up in this house. I mean it’s not like a girl like me hasn’t had very good conversations with herself from time to time, but they are much better when you can actually get a reaction from another person. This little piggy went to the market; this little piggy got hit by a truck. Yea I know I’m rephrasing quotes from I Carly. Why? You ask, well maybe it has something to do with the fact that I’m bored.



“Mrs. Brooks if you don’t mind me asking, why are they so quiet?” I asked, and I almost sounded a little bit sophisticated.


“They're not used to girls coming into this house”


Whoa, that was just a huge mind fuck. Is she seriously saying that these three hot pieces of sex on a stick were not used to having girls over!! Are they gay? Obviously not, but I would have thought that their game would have been a little better. With all the swagger invested in me, I walked confidently up to the three little “angels”. Haha I was just joking, if they’re angels then I must be a saint!


“I know I’m gorgeous, and maybe a little intimidating, but that’s no reason for you to treat me like I’m freaking Casper the friendly ghost” I said sweetly, and all three of them busted out laughing.


Fast-forward, Rewind, or some shit like that. Was I just being played at my own game?


“Your gorgeous for sure” Jai winked. “But you aren’t any more intimidating then my dog Lala”



Lala? Really, I was just being referred to a little dog. I had to laugh myself, so long as I was being compared to something cute I have no problem with it.


“Thank you for the compliment, I would have preferred just the street term bitch though… I don’t know, it just sounds more harmonic coming from a mouth like yours,” I said dreamily, and from the look on their face you could tell that it was really unexpected.



“Did you just say you prefer the term bitch?” Beau raised an eyebrow.


“Did you just make a dirty comment on Jai’s mouth?” Luke cocked his head to the side.


“Yes, and maybe” I winked at Jai. “You see I didn’t just get sent over here to fix up my act, which is actually a lie, but come on they say you learn from your mistakes… So why don’t we go make some”


“I love you already” Beau said wiping away an imaginary tear.


“Who doesn’t?”


“Well I guess we could introduce you to the rest of the guys” Luke shrugged.


“It would be my pleasure, but first let me clean myself up”


“But you look great” Jai said.


“I know, but I have to look even better just in case I see any hot guys” I teased. These boys already know they’re hot, I’m just doing them a favor and not risking inflating they’re egos any more than they already are.




After cleaning myself up, I felt refreshed and renewed. I chose to wear studded high waist jean shorts, a neon pink crop top that read “Get Laid” in big bold letters, my black motorcycle boots, and a black beanie. I did nothing special to my hair, yet still it looked great. I swear I am too freaking awesomely awesome. As for make up I applied black liner, mascara, and lip-gloss. After making love to the mirror, I picked up my small bag and went for the door.



“Okay, I’m ready!!” I yelled to no one in particular.


“Yay!!” Beau screamed out of nowhere, scaring the shimney whiskers out of me.


“What the fuck Beau?” My hand was placed over my chest, as I tried to get my breathing back on a smooth pace.



“I’m sorry Havey” I scrunched up my nose in disgust. Only my brother calls me Havey.


“ I forgive you, just please don’t ever call me Havey again” I ordered.




“My asshole of a brother calls me that”


Luckily the other two boys didn’t live so far away, and we arrived in a matter of minutes. I was so freaking excited to be in the presence of all the Janoskians… yay!! Actually, it’s them who should be thankful that I’m giving them my time of day. There are much more things I could be doing right now, Like drowning… Or burning a tree. Ha-ha I was kidding I love trees!! Then again I also love paper, but that doesn’t stop me from getting rid of my homework. As my eyes began to focus back onto the reality of what really is life, I noticed Luke staring at me.


“Lukey Duke, I know I’m too sexy for my own good, but I’d love it if you told me why is it that your staring at me” I raised an eye brow, to be completely honest I really didn’t give a rats ass.


“You would only know that I was staring at me if you were staring at me, so why were you staring at me?” He asked.


“Why were you staring at me, staring at you, staring at me?”


“Why were you staring at me, staring at you, staring at me, while I just so happened to be staring at you?”



At the exact same moment we both busted out laughing. I fucking loved life, it was times like these that made it worth living. I love when you can be all silly and all that shiz, and the people that surround you can’t really talk because they’re just as psycho as me. Although my mom wouldn’t dare to admit this to me, she was just as coo coo for coco puffs as that nutty bird in the commercial. In fact, it was me who caught her talking to a lamp after she decided to be irresponsible, and eat a plate of brownies that were suspiciously left out side on the kitchen counter. As you probably already guessed they were hash brownies, and yes they were mine, but I swear I was totally sober the time that it happened.


Okay, I guess you caught me, I was so damn high I could almost remember me saying that I love my brother. Ewe, I know, what type of shit is that?



Anyway enough with my rambling, although I’m pretty sure you guys enjoy all of my embarrassing moments. Well your in luck, my whole life is just one damn embarrassing moment.



“Haven, We are here!” Lukey yelled.


“That’s good, I actually thought we stopped to get some directions” I chuckled, remembering their video “What Direction”. Video to the right >>>>>


“Sarcasm is not a sexy factor,” Luke said.


“I make anything, and everything sexy” I stuck my tongue out at him like the child that I was.




I hadn’t realized that we stopped in front of a big park, but I thought we were going to a house. I really need to pee, and everyone who knows me knows that I can’t hold my pee. I was doing the little dance right about now, but I swear if I don’t use it I was so definitely going to make it rain. Or pour, whichever lyrical term you prefer.


I hadn’t even noticed that everyone was watching me with amusing looks. I’m glad I can humor them even while my bladders about to explode.


“It’s lovely to know that I can amuse you guys. Would you like me to pee myself also, maybe it’ll get a laugh out of you,” I said sweetly.


That’s it this baby was coming out. Ha-ha I was so totally kidding. Unless a baby could come in the form of yellow liquid, then I was certainly in the clear. I didn’t wait for anyone to notice before I dove behind a big bush. I wasn’t ashamed to say that I was actually going to be peeing behind I bush. In fact, this bush was one damn lucky piece of nature because it’s a known fact that I never leave my mark anything. I’d say that it’s this bush’s lucky day.


I was pulling up my pants, when I heard something. Looking up, I was now face to chest with a tall boy. You’re probably expecting me to scream, or maybe even have my face turn the color of a tomato, but I was slightly angrier than I was embarrassed.



“Do people even believe in privacy now in days?” I shook my head.


“I think you lost the right to privacy when you decided you’d pee in a bush, out in the public mate,” He did not just mate me.



“Suck my imaginary mother effing balls, Mate!” I exclaimed, but I couldn’t remain serious, which resulted into me almost dying of laughter.


Why is it so hard for me to remain serious? I’m guessing because maybe I just don’t take anything serious. I’m pretty sure that on my deathbed, I’d be all smiley and shit. When I could finally muster up the courage to look up. Okay, it’s more like when I finally could bring myself to stop laughing, I looked up to see yet another Janoskian. I believe that his name is Skip, or at least that’s what they call him.


“You’ve got quite the mouth on you little girl” Skip said.



“It’s okay though, when you don’t mean half of the things you say,” I muttered, even though I sometimes actually do mean half of the things I say. “As for being a little girl, I’m pretty sure a little girl wouldn’t be able to stir up as much trouble as I do”


I waited for him to respond, but he stood shut. I love having a way with words, it only makes things that much easier. I grabbed a hold of Skip’s arm, and practically dragged him over to other boys. I had my hand over his mouth, but only because he wasn’t being all that cooperative.


“Look what I found peeping in the bushes boys,” I said tossing Skip aside. “Does he belong to you?”


“Oh man” Beau said snapping his finger. “We tried to get rid of him, but he just keeps finding his way back”



“Did you pee behind that bush?” Luke asked out of nowhere.


“Yes, yes I did” I said proudly, or at least unashamed. “Do you have a problem with that?”


“No, but Mother Nature might have a problem with that”


“Look at it as, I was simply watering the plants,” I cooed.


“With urine?”


“If you want to look it that way” I shrugged.


“Your one weird chick!” Jai said shaking his head.


“Thanks for the compliment, If you would just call me crazy now I swear everything in life would be perfect” I replied back.


Now for the more “polite” greetings.


“Hello other fellow janoskians, I’m the marvelous Haven McLain!” I announced myself, and practically the whole park could hear me.


“I’m James,” Said the only boy who I had yet to meet personally.


After getting to know each other, and what not, I wanted nothing more than to turn this town inside out. I also planned on picking up some red hair dye from the store; I was going to look like the little mermaid bitches.


“So what do you guys want to do?” I asked.


“We usually make our videos tomorrow” Beau answered back, and I simply nodded my head.


“That’s perfect” I smirked. “Can we go to the shopping center?”


“Sure, I guess it is still early”


I was one of those lucky people that others hardly ever said no to. I’m not trying to brag or anything, but soon enough I was going to have these boys wrapped around my finger. Arriving in the shopping center I went straight to a beauty supply, as we Americans call it. I bought three bottles of red hair dye, and that’s only because I have so much hair. I also wanted to get something pierced.


“Boys, any suggestions for what I should get pierced?” I asked as we arrived into this sort of tattoo/piercing parlor.


“Your lip, that way we could be twins” Luke said in a girly voice, and I laughed.


“Lip it is then”



The pain was great actually, or maybe I’m just a freaking lunatic. Being that I had three tattoos, I had already found out that I was pain tolerant. I actually loved how it looked on me, but boy was my momma going to freak.


“How do I look?”


“Sexy” Beau said.


“Sexy” Luke agreed.


“Hot and enticing” Jai said.


“Hotter than before” Skip agreed.


“I have a girl friend” Was all James said, which made me smile. He was a faithful one.

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