Call Me Crazy ( A janoskians fan fiction)

Haven Lauren McLain is not your regular bad ass; in fact she is way worst. After getting sent to the principals office for the sixtieth time, and getting expelled, Haven is sent to live with one of her mothers closest friends in Australia. Haven is one tough cookie to crumble, but when her mother tells her this she freaks out.... Or does she? Haven loves the Brooks brothers, and if anything wants nothing more than to go and live it up with them in Australia. But what if things aren't all that their cracked up to be? For example, what if it just so happens that the brother, who she just so happens to hate, is forced to go with her? What happens when the vacation of a lifetime, comes washing down the drain? What if the only person you've ever fallen in love with, doesn't love you back. Read to find out whom, when, and why, Haven's life has just turned into the worst roller coaster on the planet.


4. I'll kill you, I'll dare you, and I'll hate you (Part One)



“I’m going to fucking kill you guys” I roared.


I guess while I was sleeping these dumb Asses decided to hide all of my stuff, and now I can’t find my darn clothes. I know what you’re about to ask…. So I’m just going to answer that question.


Yes-sick puppies, I do sleep in the nude, but so does freaking Harry Styles, and every body wants his gravy. Wait!! That means that those bastards saw me naked.


I mean, sure I was covered by a blanket, but I don’t think that’s enough to stop three pubescent boys from sneaking a peek at my boo. My boo being my goodies.


I wrapped the thin blanket around me, and carefully made my way into the hall. If today was my lucky day, than maybe my brother got hit by a bus, and my clothes would magically turn up. Of course, today was not my lucky day. Neither will tomorrow be my lucky day.


“Wow” A husky voice exclaimed from behind me. “Just when I thought my sister couldn’t look more like a slut, she goes and pulls a trashy” Luke said shaking his head.


I didn’t even want to turn around. If I did turn around, I was pretty sure that I’d knock a bitch out, which probably wouldn’t be so bad since it’s one of those things on my bucket list.


“Shut the hell up Luke!” I said through gritted teeth.


“Make Me,” He teased. I could feel a smirk spreading across his face. “Oh, that’s right, you can’t. Maybe it’s because your clothes are missing. Am I right?” How would he know?


“You’re the one who took all my clothes?” I asked astonished. I never thought my brother would pull such a move… it could’ve impressed me, if I wasn’t the one standing naked in the hall.


“No, actually, it was those three idiots out in the yard” He said. “But I guess sometimes I just get luck, and bad things happen naturally. Karmas a bitch” He snickered.


“And so are you” I muttered under my breath.


I wrapped the blanket tighter around me, and went out in the yard. I wasn’t so mad anymore. In fact, I think the conversation with my brother upset me more than the fact that I looked like a girl who just got out of bed, and had a night of horrible sex. Although I made a smart choice, and refused to look in the mirror (I would’ve gotten scared if I did) I was sure that my hair was disheveled, which probably wasn’t my worst look since I’ve spent quite a lot of time with my hair disheveled if you know what I mean. (Winky face) When I entered the yard, three jaws dropped.


“Okay you three little cock boogers” I said sweetly. “Which one of you knows where my clothes are? And which one of you is going get lucky tonight?” I pulled the blanket down an inch to let them know where I was “heading”.


I wasn’t actually going to give them anything tonight, unlike Ne-Yo and Pit Bull; I have some sort of class. As if I had turned on a light switch, well actually I turned on three boys… They all scrambled to their feet, and went to go retrieve my clothes.


I bit down on my lip to stop myself from laughing. I can’t wait until they found out that the only prize they would receive is a big blow to the balls. Ewe I just had a dirty thought. Then again, when don’t I have a dirty thought? Never.


What I meant was, the only prize they’ll receive is a big kick in the balls. Yes, that sounds more pure, even though I’m pretty sure that innocent girls shouldn’t be hitting gold in the south.


About a minute later, they all came running toward me with bags of my clothes. Jai, who wasn’t wearing a shirt by the way, had me going weak with all his muscles and shit. He was probably the fittest of all the brothers, and I didn’t have a problem with admitting that. Like I said before, I’m a really honest bitch. Why lie, if lies always come back to bite you in the ass? I’d much rather just dish out the truth, even though sometimes the truth might get me kicked in the ass. Which one do you prefer, a kick or a bite?



I’ll take the kick thank you very much.



“Thanks boys, especially you Jai” I winked, which caused him to nearly drop my bag.


“F-for what?” He stuttered. Boy do I love having this affect on boys.


“For having an incredibly sexy body,” I purred.


“That makes two of us,” He whispered, but I could still hear him.


“So, now that I have my clothes” I giggled. “Would you please be kind enough to bring my bags into my room?”


“Of course” They said in unison.



I followed the boys into the house, which if I’m being completely honest didn’t leave me with a bad view. I liked things better from behind. Okay pause…. Get that dirty thought out of your mind you dirty pigs. I only like some things better from behind. For example, I like to talk to my brother better from behind so I don’t have to see his ugly face.


“Thanks boys” I said cheerfully.


“No problem Haven” Beau said.


I was just about to close the door, when somebody stuck his or her foot in. It was Jai, and I was smiling.


“What’s wrong Brooks?”


“Just thought I should let you know that you look sexy when you’re naked” He smirked.


“And how would you know?” I raised an eyebrow. “I’m not even naked, I have a blanket”


“Let’s just say I can’t control my hormones, and you didn’t seem to protest when you were asleep” He winked at me, and laughed.


“Get out of the room Jai” I said turning red.


“Okay, but I made you blush,” He teased.


“What can I say, you have that affect on me”


With those words I closed the door. He was probably expecting me to do the usual girly move, and deny my ability to blush when a guy makes a comment. I’m not in denial, I’m sure that if a hot guy was constantly complimenting me I’d never loose that shade of crimson.


I shook my head, and decided that I’d take a shower. I still have yet to dye my hair, but I was beginning to question it. I wasn’t sure if red was my color, but it might be somebody else’s (evil laugh)


The boys better prepare themselves for some wicket revenge.


Luckily it was only temporary hair dye because I don’t think that I’d ever want to ruin their sexy sex hair, but it’ll do for a good laugh for about three days or so. I showered quickly, and brushed my hair. I got dressed in some black leggings; an over sized “Hipsta Please” sweater, and some cute black booties.  I applied some matte red lipstick being careful not to move my lip ring, gel eyeliner, and some mascara.


Today was a perfect day to do a prank on the boys because it was also the day that they film the Janoskians. How cool would it be to see these three bozos looking like Clifford the big red dog was sleeping on their head? It would be totally cool. Creeping into their bathroom, I replaced the shampoo, with red hair dye.


After getting rid of all the evidence, I slipped out of the bathroom as quietly as possible. I didn’t really care that they knew it was I. In fact, I wanted them to know it was I. You are probably thinking that I’m crazy person for wanting to get caught. But for starters 1) they already saw me purchase the dye. 2) They started by kid napping my clothes. 3) They needed to lean not to mess with me.


So yea, call me crazy all you want, but I really don’t care. You should probably already know my personality by now. I’m being serious when I say that I probably came out of the womb with a big cheeky grin on my face, and my middle fingers up. I wouldn’t be surprised if my first word was asshole, and I’m pretty sure it must’ve been directed to my brother.


To relieve me of some of my boredom, while the boys got ready for our day out, I decided to take a quiz on line.


Title: Personality Quiz.



Name: Haven freaking McLain


Date of Birth: December 12, 1994


Occupation: Being a bitch


Likes: Singing, dancing, making out, f*ck sessions, and walks on the beach. (Smiles evilly)


Dislikes: Fake hoes, skanks, fun suckers, and clothes. (Winky face)


Relationship status: Single as a pringle


Friendship status: F*ck friends


Mother: Beautiful lady


Father: Never around


Financial status: Rich as a bitch (Thanks to my loving momma)


Best day of your life: When I popped out of my mom’s vagina.


Worst day of your life: When I decided to take this quiz.


Favorite color: Rainbow. (I think picking a color makes the others jealous)


Favorite movie: Kick Ass


Favorite quote: If people are hating on you, it’s because you’re doing something right.


Hair color: Electric blonde and pink.


Eye color: Striking blue


Height: five foot one


Rate your looks from 1-10: 100


Boy crush: One Direction (I can’t choose)


Girl crush: Ariana Grande and Miranda Kerr


Where do you live: Where do you live? (Stalker much)


Nickname: I go by a lot of names.



Finally I pressed the little submit button. I’m not even sure what this quiz was about, but anything to stop it from asking me questions. At least now you know more about me to conclude that yes I’m kind of straight forward, and I don’t really give a shit about what others think about me. I’m the kind of girl that gets around town. But I don’t get around by sleeping with every single person, who includes girls because I have no sexual preference, but I get around because I’m the party up in this bitch. Yea, I probably should have mentioned before that I’m sort of a bisexual, but I guess now you know. I suddenly heard a ding, and squinted to read what was printed on the screen.


Sending in your results after you take this survey.


What the fudge? I don’t want my results that bad; I already know what I’m going to get anyway.


I hit close. All those good answers have now gone to waste. After staring into space for what seemed like forever, three chicken heads decided to grace me with their presence. Oh man, none of them decided to wash their hair. 

Oh well, I guess I'll just have to wait until tomorow for the final product.


“Finally!!” I exclaimed. “ I was beginning to think that you losers left me”


“We could never leave you” Luke grinned.


“I know,” I said honestly. I knew they could never leave me… I just wanted to hear it. “So you sluts, where do you guys plan on taking me?”


“Slut isn’t such a nice word,” Beau reprimanded. He’s one to talk, every word that come out of that boys mouth can’t be said in church. “But to answer your question, we’re going to record another fail video”


I began to jump up and down with excitement. I’ve always wanted to be in a fail video!!


“What’s today’s dirty deed?” I asked eagerly.


“We thought we might do another video on Ellen’s dance dare…. Even though that dare has been long over with,” Jai said.


“Haven!!” Beau screamed. “Are you fucking ready?”


“Beau!!” I yelled back. “Are you fucking ready?”


“For what?” He screamed once again. I swear this boys scream is so loud I’m sure deaf people could hear it.


“For all of this” I wiggled my body, which earned me a laugh.


“Well in that fucking case, I think I’m fucking ready,” He said calmly.


“Stop using the F word” I ordered, but I wasn’t one to talk.


“But you just used that word” He protested.


“Yea, but I make it sound innocent” I defended. “ You sound like a freaking maniac when you use all of that fuckery”


“Crap, can I use the word crap?” He asked.


“Sure, what ever will help you sleep at night” I sang.


“You in my bed would help me sleep at night,” He said licking my cheek.


“You’re such a dirty hoe, Beau” Ha-ha, that rhymed.


“I try my best”


After all of this commotion, we all drove to the mall. Of course, we had to go pick up the rest of our dysfunctional gang (That’s my new name for us) James and Skip was happy to see me, which didn’t surprise me at all. I make a lot of people happy with just a glimpse of my beautiful angelic face.


That song from sponge bob kept going on in my head on our drive there. It’s goes something like… I’m ready, I’m ready, I’m ready, I’m ready, I’m ready to the fifty power since I’m not so sure on how many times that flamboyant yellow sponge actually says the word.


Look out Australia, the new girl is in town, and I’m ready to get kicked out.




Please follow me on twitter @spicy_nialler :D 

You can ask me questions on there, and I'll gladly answer. Also, I'm always free to chat with when I'm not in school. 

Follow me on keek @Gagajanoskian1D 


I'll follow all fo you guys back!! 


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