Saving Each Other

"I can't keep doing this Niall!" she screamed, as I held her firmly. I ran my fingers through my hair, pushing the damp strand out of my face, locking our gaze. "Em, please." I whispered, and I doubt she heard me over the thundering rain. It was killing me to see her like this. "I can't do this! I can't keep being the strong one!" she cried out. "I-If I have to be strong for you, how am I supposed to be strong for me Niall? How am I supposed" she struggled to find words, but all I heard was silence after that.
It was me. It was all me. The reason she was like this now. It wasn't because of her dad. It was me. my heart sank. I was killing the girl that I, now realized, loved. I loved her, and I was the reason she was broken. I wasn't going to push it away anymore. I wasn't going to hide from it. I loved her. I loved Emily Payne. And I was killing her.


3. Our Promise

Emily's POV
"Em, love?" I could hear Liam's voice, extremely close to me. He nudged me for the hundredth time. I couldn't take it I shot up, but I didn't get far, because something hit me in the head. An aching pain traveled through my head. "OW!!!" I yelled, but it sounded echoed. It was then that I realized Liam had yelled out too. Oh..So I bumped into him. He sat up, rubbing his forehead. I gave him a look as if to say "Honestly Liam?" he grinned and helped me up off the bed. "You should get up now." he said, still smiling. 
"What are you so happy about?" I asked him suspiciously. He raised an eyebrow. "Nothing it's just..You're here, Em. You'"  he grinned wider, as if the reality had just hit him. I nodded. "Yeah..I-I guess I am." 

I thought back to the night before. Niall. Niall. He was all on my mind. I had meant to wak eup earlier, look up some of the "Hater" comments, see what he was going on about last night, but I was REALLY tired. "Hungry?" Liam asked, snatching me out of my thoughts and pulling me back into reality. "I..yeah. What's for breakfast?" I asked him, checking the clock on the pale wall. 8:21. " Harry was making eggs..want?" I nodded and he smiled before leaving to go downstairs. I collapsed back on my bed. Niall. Niall. I buried my face in my pillow and screamed,muffled, begging that stupid voice to go away. I went through problems, haters and all that, and I made it through without help. Niall can do the same. Why'd I feel the urge to help him. If I can do it, he can too. I'm not going to help him. He needs to grow up. 

Is that really how you feel? YESS!!! I shouted at this stupid voice. I listened for its response, but all I heard was silence. And then I realized I was speaking to an imaginary voice in my head that didn't exist. I got up. Okay, I'm going insane. I stepped into the bathroom, and freshened up. 

Time Skip

Silence. Not a single word from any one of us. Me and Niall I mean, of course. Liam, Harry, Zayn and Louis were endlessly going on and on about..who knows what. Niall sat opposite me, staring blankly down at his food. I poked my eggs around on my plate. As appetizing as they looked(and they really did look tasty) I wasn't hungry. I felt quite insecure with Niall sitting there and I couldn't figure out why. Every one of my flaws stood out more. I was stressing, and it really didn't make sense since her refused to look at me. He sat there, staring at pure nothingness. Bzz. Bzz. His phone vibrated on the table. Immediately, Liam glanced at him with a slight shake of the head, extremely discreet, and if I hadn't been looking, I wouldn't have seen it. Niall sighed and just dropped his head lower down. 

"We're having a signing next week, you should come Em." Zayn said, smiling warmly at me.
"Yeah, it would be fun, wouldn't it Niall?" Harry said, urging him to talk. I watched as Niall plastered on a smile and agreed. It pained me to see that his smile fell as quickly as it had come. "I need to go shopping. And Liam promised me he'd take me" Zayn said, eyeing Liam. "And wasn't it you who always said, you can't break your promises?" His words were teasing in the air, and Liam sighed. 
"Fine." he rolled his eyes and Zayn beamed.

"Harry and I are going to the beach." Louis announced, getting up. Liam looked at me. "What about you, love?" he asked me. I shook my head. "I..I think I'm just going to hang out here." He blinked. 
"She won't be alone." I heard Harry say. "Niall's not going anywhere today." I looked up to see Niall, and he met my gaze. He quickly looked away, frowning. I felt a tiny part of me break when he looked away. he didn't like me. No biggie. Not everyone's going to like you."Oh okay. great, well I'll see you in a few hours, love. Call if you need anything." Liam said. He gave Niall one last look. Niall nodded and gestured for him to go.

I don't know how it happened, but in seconds, the room was silent, and no one was there but Niall and me. We sat there in a deafening silence. He looked down at his phone, his face falling. I needed to distract him. Since we were alone, I decided to ask him about last night. "So, Niall I was-" 
"I'm in my room." he said, his accent strong, and slamming the phone down on the table, he hurried up the stairs. Oh no...Oh no. Liam's gone...Zayn's gone...Harry and Louis are gone..And Niall's going to...Oh crud. 

Yes, I know I was snooping, but this was a matter of life or death..sort of. I scrolled down his phone. I gulped at the first page:
-You're so useless
-I guess even God makes mistakes
-You don't deserve to be in One Direction, or to exist. Go die
-Simon HAD to choose the ugly blonde with no talent right? Niiicce

Oh God. It was worse than me. I slowly walked up the steps, thinking of an approach. As I reached the top, I heard his door slam. my heart was beginning to race now. No one but me was here to stop him. He was capable of doing anything right now. I could hear my heart beat hammering in my head. I swallowed hard and knocked on his door. "N-Niall?" My voice was quivering from fear of what he was doing in there. No response. Oh no. "Niall, it's Emily."Who else would it be idiot, Santa Claus? Still nothing. I cautiously turned the knob and the door swung open. I gasped.

Niall sat on the ground, leaning against the bed, hugging his knees. At his feet were a bottle of pills, and I honestly didn't want to find out what is was. His shoulders drooped and he stared at the pills at his feet. His shaky fingers reached out and brushed against the top of the bottle. "Niall what are you-" I ran into the room, snatching the bottle from his fingers. He didn't flinch. I didn't dare read the name, afraid I could be right. I just checked to make sure the seal hadn't been broken. OK, it hadn't.

I stared at him in disbelief, and tears began to form in his eyes. "Would it..Would it matter if I did anyway?" he whispered. My eyes began to water as I saw him there. Memories came flooding back when i had attempted. Liam came in before I could even take it out of my bag. I fought and screamed, but he wouldn't let me go. I dropped the bottle as his tears overflowed and silently streamed down his face. "Would it matter if I ended it?" 
"Ni..Niall do you know how serious this is? You need some sort of help!" I was fighting back the tears that threatened to come out. I pulled out my phone, ready to call Liam, but he stopped me, finally looking at me, the blue in his eyes standing out even more when he cried. His cool fingers lightly coiled around my wrist. "Pl-Please don't." he choked. He reached for the bottle and I kicked it away. He cried harder, and I found myself beginning to cry as well. "Let me do it!" he yelled, crawling towards it. I pushed him back, but he determined. "Let me!" he screamed again.

I pulled him into me, even though I was way tinier than him. "Niall, please don't do this." I murmured to him as he cried into my neck. This was supposed to be awkward. I didn't know him. But it wasn't at all. It fit. He "Th-They w-want me-e t-t-to, I-I wan-nt t-to." he sobbed and I pulled him tighter. No, we weren't friends, but I couldn't let him do this. Wiping his tears, I pushed him back at arms length. And suddenly, I was telling him my story. My life of  my mother, my father and the bullies that almost killed me once. And suddenly, all those tears I held back couldn't stay back any longer. I didn't want his pity, I wanted him to see that he's not the only one with problems. That I understood.

"Niall..I'll make you a promise." He looked up at me with puffy eyes, hiccuping but never breaking our gaze. "I promise..that I won't hurt myself..if you don't hurt yourself. So if you hurt yourself, I'll hurt myself too. And if you cared about me at all, you'd agree not to do it anymore." His mouth gaped open as more tears formed. I nodded, going over my words. I'd tangled him. He slowly nodded and lay down on the ground. I did the same and listened to him cry. "I-I'm sorry y-y-you ha-ave to se-e like th-this." he whispered. When he quieted down, I began to ask him questions about himself, get his mind off the incident that had just taken place. And by the time Liam came home, we were on the couch watching television. I'm not sure I'd made a friend, but I'd made Niall a promise. I was going to stick to it. Not exactly what I had in mind when I came to live with One Direction. But I had just saved a life. And I was feeling pretty damn good about it.

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