Always Midnight

Madison Johnson's life changes the moment she lays eyes on Christian Watson. Christian is unlike any boy Madison has ever met in her life, he's a guy with a secret-he's a vampire with a deadly past. When they fall in love, Christian's past soon makes its way into their future together. As his past catches up to him, Madison must decide how much she will sacrifice to be with the man she loves.


Copyright © 2011

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45. I See the Change In You (pt 2)

 

“What’s wrong?” He asked looking around and sniffing the air. 

“When you battle Katherine you’re going to need strength, she thinks you’re weak and in a way she might be right. If we can boost your strength then she might not want to go through with this, but even if she does then you will be on the same playing field as her. Do you agree?” I told him, ignoring his question.

“Yes, I guess so…I planned on hunting tonight, and for the next couple of days to prepare myself.” He told me.

“Animals won’t be enough.” I countered.

“What-” But he didn’t finish his sentence because the realization of what I was planning hit him, sooner than I would’ve liked. “No. How could you even-” 

“It has to be done, you need to feed off of me. You said it yourself that my blood has kept you strong, it has to be done please, this is the only way.” I protested, begging that he would see that I was right.

“No! This is too dangerous for you, last time I barely stopped in time, it was a blessing Nathaniel was there to monitor the situation. It’s too risky for me…” He continued to speak naming off the many dangers but by that time I realized I had to do it myself, I didn’t want to do it the hard way but he left me no choice. 

While he continued to talk I placed my hands behind my back pulling out the tiny razor I hidden in my back pocket. I would never cut myself on purpose but I had no other alternative, quickly I sliced my index finger open. Christian’s head jerked up, instantly smelling the blood and before I knew it, he stood behind me yanking the blade from me and throwing it over the balcony.

“Are you bloody insane!?” He yelled at me outraged, grabbing my arm to assess the damage I done to myself. 

“Yes!” I shouted back, thrusting my bloodied finger towards his face. Christian gasped. The blood gushed from my finger, and I realized I cut too deep. A stinging pain made me wonder if I had made a huge mistake. Christian stood in front of me paralyzed unable to look away from my finger, I knew I had to continue through with the plan. 

I rushed towards him, “Stop pretending and denying who you are Christian. For once give in and stop hiding yourself from me.” I pleaded.

I squeezed my finger more making more blood gush out and even wiped it on my lips, I could see his resolve cracking. He wouldn’t move an inch, trying to fight the urge, but I noticed his brown eyes dance with excitement. I moved closer to him standing on my tip toes and kissed him with the blood smeared on my lips. I moved quickly and startled him, he grabbed me by the shoulders, preparing to push me away. But at the last second, he didn’t. He pulled me into him, kissing me while licking the blood from my lips. He moaned loudly kissing me with such force my lips started to hurt but I kissed him back. 

Christian picked me up as he continued kissing me fiercely, I wrapped my legs around him as he walked me to the bed. He laid me down on the bed standing up over me, his eyes were blue now and I knew that I had won. I raised my finger to his lips, which he sucked on drawing out more blood, the familiar feeling of euphoria crept along my spine. I sighed in pleasure as I watched him as he tore his mouth from my finger gasping for air he didn‘t need. His eyes blazed like a wild fire with excitement, he stared at me passionately and climbed on me gently intertwining his fingers in mine above my head.

He kissed me on my forehead, then back to my lips hungrily I matched his passion with my own thirst but not for blood. My body felt on fire. He moved from my mouth to the base of my neck planting gentle kisses before he bit down hard. My body jerked instinctively to the pain but I forced myself to relax and I gave in to Christian as he drank my blood in long deep swallows. I lost sense of time or how long he continued to drink but a soft moan escaped my lips causing Christian to abruptly tear himself away from me.

“Madison!” Christian yelled shaking me roughly.

“It’s okay! I’m fine why did you stop?” I asked him confused by his abruptness, but he didn’t answer.

He took a fleeting long look at me before he fled down the stairs, in that one instant I snapped out of my euphoric state of mind. The look he gave me crushed me, he looked at me for the first time as if I were a monster-a monster who betrayed him.

My breathing began to slow down and I forced myself to push back the tears, I had to do it I tried to justify. I knew he would be mad at me and maybe think of me differently but he needed to be stronger. I hoped he would forgive me. Unlike, last time when Christian drew my blood I wasn’t tired, I never felt more alive. I sat up in the bed and shook off the last ruminants of dizziness that fogged my brain, once it did I went to the bathroom to wash up.

Once I entered the bathroom and caught my reflection I gasped in horror. My lip was bloody because Christian had bitten it, which I didn’t even notice when he kissed me. My lips were red and bruised along with the side of my neck but thankfully the bite wounds were already healing. My eyes were wild as if I’d just done methamphetamine, and my hands and wrists had bruises on them, bruises that were no doubt the marks from fingers. 

I looked like hell but that was a price I had to pay, I thought to myself. I splashed cold water on my face and though my wounds were already healing I washed them to prevent any infection. I shut off the light and walked back into the bedroom only to see Christian there sitting with his head hanging. I remained standing in the doorway of the bathroom afraid to say anything or move, I expected him to take longer to come back.
“How could you do that to me? Do you have any idea what you’ve done?” He asked harshly. 

“I had to, I had no choice you need strength and I am not going to stand by and let you get yourself killed. I had to do what was best.” I whispered to him. 

“It was foolish, I would never expect this from you.” He told me disappointed.

“I am truly sorry but I can’t let you go against Katherine without your maximum power potential. I know the way I went about it was wrong and dangerous but I am not going to apologize for doing what needs to be done even if you don’t agree with it.” I told him.

“How can you justify what has just happened? Do you not see the danger behind it? Look at you!” He cried out.

“I do see how it was dangerous I know it was hard for you to stop but I trust you with my life and I knew you had the strength to stop. There was never any doubt for me, and if I suffer a few bruises then so be it as long as I get to keep you alive!”

“Stop it! Don’t talk like that Madison, I can’t…I can’t talk about this anymore. Lets drop this.” He lifted his head up staring at me. He looked so young and human it startled me, he had a nice glow to his face. I wanted to go over to him and touch his face to see if what I saw was real but I was too afraid to move. I should’ve just agreed in order to make peace with him but I had to voice my opinion. 

“I wish I could but we can’t. If you’re going to be stronger then you have to feed on me until you fight Katherine-” I started to say.

Christian looked horror-stricken at my idea, “No, no I will not and the next time you try to cut yourself then I’m going to let you bleed and bring you to the hospital. You can explain to your mother why you’re there. And you will never see me again, I can’t let you harm yourself like that ever again.” He threatened. 

I ignored him and continued, “Please see reason here! You must know I’m right, please do this for me!”

“Are you insisting I drink off of you because you care for my safety or is it because you are addicted to my bite?” He asked, his words cold.

“Is that what you think of me? Like I am some blood lust whore?” I asked shocked. 

“I don’t know...are you?”

“If you don’t know the answer to that question then you don’t know me at all. I’m not going to lie the bite is wonderful but I did this to keep you strong and alive. Never in a million years would I have cut myself on purpose just to get off especially when I want you in a different way. The fact you would think that low of me hurts me more than you’ll ever know.”

I walked past him furious and down the stairs into the living room throwing myself on the couch. Fresh hot tears slid down my face causing me to wipe them away in anger. Upstairs in the room I heard Christian’s cell phone ring, after a few rings he answered. I didn’t know who he was talking to because he opted to speak in French which I knew nothing off. After a few minutes of conversation there was nothing but silence for what appeared to feel like hours, making me wish there was a television here.

I sighed in boredom, letting my head fall back into the headrest and stared at the ceiling. I never heard him come downstairs when I heard him sigh it made jump in the air. 

“Are you in pain at all?” He asked me concerned, when I turned my attention to him I realized he held an ice bag.

“Not physically but mentally.” I told him.

“I’m sorry.” Christian whispered taking my hand into his, putting the ice bag by my side.

I didn’t respond instead I kissed his hand, his eyes searched mine trying to understand why I would go to such great lengths for him. Trying to understand what he could say or do to take that pain away from my eyes. But there wasn’t anything for him to understand because love isn’t meant to be understood, love makes people do irrational things for the ones they love. This is what I wanted to tell him, but instead I remained silent not wanting to upset him any further. Christian’s eyes were blue but yet he was in complete control of himself, it amazed me.

“You’re right Madison but I don’t want you to be. That was Nathanial I talked to and he says that you’re right, I didn’t tell him that I’ve already fed on you just that it was a mere suggestion on your part. When I feed it must be on my terms can you agree to that for me? No more cutting yourself please I don’t think I could bear to see that ever again.” He pleaded with me.

“Okay.” I agreed, fatigued with all of the night’s events but happy that he'd realized that I’d been right. “How do you feel? Your eyes are blue but you seem to be in control.” I observed.

“I feel…remarkable alive. I can feel the blood heating up everything in my body, its a wonderful feeling. But as good as this feeling is I would give it all back. To see you here bruised and bloody kills me, when I heard you moan I knew I was drinking too much, I thought…I thought…” He couldn’t finish, his voice cracked and a single tear fell down his cheek. I wrapped my arms around him resting my head in the crook in his neck.

“Shhhh…. I am so sorry.” I whispered. 

“I thought I’d killed you, I was so scared.” He finished his voice raspy and thick. 

“I knew you wouldn’t. I didn’t think…oh God I am so sorry.” I stroked his hair, and planted kisses over his face and neck. He returned my kisses showing me his forgiveness, he picked me up effortlessly from the chair and carried me back upstairs laying me softly on the bed. He laid down next to me wrapping me in his arms, “Get some sleep love, its been a long night.” He whispered. I closed my eyes and for the first time-Christian hummed me to sleep.  

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