Rejection

I’ve been living in this box for all my life. Being quiet and shy. Never talking to my mom. People taking so much pity on me. I just want them out of my life. Even my mom… Especially my mom.
Kassie has been going through hardships ans she realizes she no longer wants to be the geek, the person everyone takes pity on, the creepy girl who cuts herself, ugly. And from that decision, everything changes...

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8. Kassie

I'm at my crappy house now and luckily the door is open because I lost my keys. I run straight to my room and lock myself inside as I think of a list of bad words to call Peter.

A- Ass, B- Bastard, Bitch... M- Manwhore... S- Stupid, Shithole...

Then I think of a list of words to call myself.

U- Ugly... S- Stupid... W- Worthless

I begin to sob into my pillow. Why did I have to go through all this? Why did God choose for my life to be like this and not someone else's? Why am I an ugly, worthless, stupid asshole who can't even realize that a guy is using me? A girl who can never be loved. I open my bottom drawer and take out the thing I haven't used since last year. The thing I don't know why I still kept here. I guess it's useful now. I take the knife and trace the scars that have begun to heal. I press the blade against my skin amd feel painful relief that I can't understand. I want to remember this pain. The pain that the people of this world put me through. I don't want to stay in this pit of depression. And these scars are the only ones that notice my pain. And this knife is the only one that comforts me during it.

 

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