One girls, one night, one too many, 5 guys, no names, one wild night out. When Gracie ends up in bed with One Direction she has to work out which one before things turn from worse


13. Teenagers Suck

10 am found me in the kitchen making pancakes for the sex God of Wolverhampton who looked ridiculously adorable sound asleep in my bed. I was kinda floating on cloud nine and I wasn’t letting anything bring me down, except this stupid nagging feeling that I needed to call Ma and find out where Jake really was.

The dream I had last night was the first in a while but it still make me worry about my brother and what he’s doing with his life. He’s never been on the right track in life, whenever you think he’s really trying it’s only a matter of time before he goes in search for his next high. I needed to drown out the warning signs in my head so I took to music.

“It’s just a dream,” I reassured myself as I flicked through my playlist choosing some Robert DeLong to boost my mood and make me feel at least a little bit a live. Happy thoughts is what I needed. Happy thoughts of Liam…and that thing he does with his tongue. I shiver ran down my spine just thinking about it.

He’d obviously had experience in the department, but hadn’t we all. I was still yet to address the fact I had had practically dry humped or made out with some of his friends.  How should I start that conversation?

Hey, I just shagged you, and this is crazy, but I made out with your friend, and dry humped the other in the middle of a bar, but I promise is really you I like. Add a wink for the road and scene!

This is more fucked up than a story line of Coro.

I danced around the kitchen draining out the looming depression till I heard Liam’s smug voice behind me. I could just feel the lopsided grin on his face.

Damn you Robert DeLong.

“You have a nice place, cold, but nice.”  He had a smirk on his face as he eyed me up and down wearing my Spice Girls pyjama pants and an old, oversized jumper of my brothers.

“How long have you been standing there,” I felt the blush rising in my cheeks. For God sakes, I’ve fucked him and now I can’t even look him in the eyes.

Who’s a dirty slut? I’m a dirty slut! 

“I forget you’ve only seen my bedroom.”

“I do vaguely remember coming in here this morning.” He stood opposite me. My kitchen was tiny and the fact that he was that close to me didn’t go unnoticed. Every now and then his hand would graze my ass setting my skin on fire.

“You were half asleep, I’m surprised you even found your way around my apartment.” As I flipped the final pancake onto the plate Liam put his hand around my waist, just as he did last night, resting then on my stomach.

A feeling of awkwardness washed over me. Gezz one minute we are discussing or weirdest dreams e next we are talking about the size of my apartment.

“Your apartment really isn’t that big,” he chuckled in my ear. I elbowed him in the ribs, pressing my ass against his groin.

“We have a problem,” I grinned out the window watching the rain thrash against it.

“What’s our problem.” He grinned into my hair, humouring me with the rerun of last night’s conversation.

“Well, every time I’m within 10 meters of you,” I turned in his arms so he could see the seriousness in my eyes. I wrapped my arms around his neck and grinned up at him, “All I want to do it jump your bones.” I giggled.

“You know, sometimes, I feel like you only want me for my body.” He kissed me on the lips, sneakily snagging a pancake off the bench behind me, rolling it up and taking a bite. He groaned shaking his roll at me…roll aha.

“This is kinda like heaven.”

“Don’t get too excited. This is literally the only thing I can cook,” without completely burning it or setting my house on fire.

“Lies! I bet you’re a master chief.”

“Master Chief of cheese toasties,” I giggled into his chest.

“I think I could live on those,” he grinned, leaning in for a kiss. “So what’s your plan for today?”

“Job searching.” I sighed. I still hadn’t heard from Ezra or Juliet Wringly, at this stage its better to cut my losses and start another tedious job search.

“Did you not have a job when I saw you last.” He followed me to the lounge with plates and syrup, pinching my ass as I walked.

“Well I did, but I am pinning the fact that I don’t on you.” I turned on the TV, snagging another pancake and resting head in his lap. Gordie Shore bleared in the back ground. It was kind of my guilty pleasure.

“Why, may I ask, are you blaming me? Did you get fired?” his voice was full of confusion and astonishment.

“What! No, do you actually think I would get fired. I, am a star employee.” I sat up holding my hand to my chest.

“A star employee with a dirty mouth.” He grinned at me running his finger over my bottom lip.

“You love my dirty mouth,” I laid back into his lap. “It truly was your fault though.”

“What have I ever done?”

“It’s all apart of our problem you see. Ezra must have like a sexdar or something.” I shrugged reaching for another pancake. These were actually pretty good. I’d have to thank ma for the recipe.

“And what is a sexdar?” He chuckled as he stroked my hair.

“It’s like a gaydar I guess, but, like cause ya know there’s you and I and a whole lot of sexual tension everywhere and she was like whoa, they are so getting it on, I aint giving her no job. And it’s all because of you.” I grinned up at him taking his hand to my mouth and planting a kiss on his palm.

“That is the biggest load of shit that has come out of your mouth thus far! And there is always something interesting coming out of your mouth. You are the one with self-control issues.”

“Are you serious right now? You wanna talk about self-control issues, buddy,” I sat up on the defence. We were eye to eye, goofy grins plastered on booth our faces. “If I do recall, you were the one that came onto me, while I was working I might add. You kissed me first!” I shoved his chest lightly.

“You didn’t exactly stop me.”

“Maybe I didn’t want to stop you. Maybe, I was being a polite lady.”

“Last time I checked polite ladies don’t wrap their legs around strange men.”

“Oh honey, by that stage you weren’t a stranger in coochie-villie,” I cannot believe I just said that out loud. Liam’s eyes almost popped out of his head as did half the pancake he had in his mouth. I slapped my hand over my own mouth having no idea what just happened. “You were my tall drink of water and wasn’t going to be the one to reject you.” I drawled grinning at him.

He raised his eyebrows and said nothing. I win.

I grinned at his sheepish face, a slight blush creeping up his cheeks “I win!” I cheered triumphantly.

“Bullshit. You are just…not even cool.”

“Excuse me Liam, who just made you pancakes!”

“I don’t even like pancakes.” He refused to look me in the eye. He crossed his arms fixing his eyes on the TV.

I straddled his laps, my hands running through the hair on the back at his neck “Who rocked your world last night.”

“Please don’t say that,” He begged “I once overheard my Dad saying it to my Mum and I’ve been scared forever.” He groaned, throwing his head back against the chair.

Gross. Remind me to never bring that line out again.

Placed my lips against his giving him a lingering kiss. “Who fucked your brains out last night.”

He groaned softly “oh, this chick but I can’t remember her name. What was it again? Gretchen…Gloria…no it was Greta.”

“I will actually hang you by your balls.” He grinned reaching up for a kiss. His tongue brushed along my bottom lip as he took the kiss deeper. I shifted in his lap earning a heafty groan of pain rather than pleasure.

“Are you ok?” I rested my forehead to his.

“You’re a girl, I’m a guy. You’re kissing me and you’re wriggling in my lap. Things are…happening.” He blushed in embarrassment. God he’s adorable!

“What things are happening, Liam?” I asked in a husky voice, purposely grounding my hips slightly against him. His hands can up to rest at on my ass, halting my movements.

“You want me to spell it out for you.”

“I’m a sucker for a nerds.” I whispered as if it were a crime for anyone else to hear, but our moment was completely ruined my Liam phone.

“Are you kidding me!” He groaned as he answered it resting his forehead against my shoulder.

I rested my hands in my lap, grazing them dangerously close to Liam’s junk.

“Hello?...Yeah…Now?...No, your right.” He grabbed my hand, stilling my movements, he shot me a warning look.

Grace: 1, Liam: 0.

“Sounds good, I’ll be there soon.” He sighed as he slide the bar on his phone.

“Duty calls?” I asked, masking my disappointment.

“I would like nothing more than spend the day with you, doing absolutely nothing but each other.” He wagged his eye brows play fully.

“I see what you did there.” Wise ass.

“Gimmie your phone,” No. No one touches The Phone.

“I promise I took no photos of you! You don’t need my phone.”

“Why would you take photos of me?”

“Why wouldn’t I take photos of you.” I looked him up and down to prove my point.

“Just gimmie your phone, baby.” Baby. Asdfghjkl. Baby. I gave up handing Liam my phone.

He stuck his tongue out with wide eyes and took a selfie. Liam kissed my cheek and slipped it into my pocket.

It, sadly, being my phone.

“Now you can contact me.” I raised my eyebrows at him.

“We have totally done this backward you know.  Screw me, date me, call me!” I exaggerated, throwing myself onto the other side of the love seat.

“I’ll just girlfriend you and we’ll be even.” He put his hand out for me to shake. I bit my lip to hide my grin, placing my hand in his. Spontaneous, sexy and ridiculously mine.

“Sounds good, Boyfriend.” I pulled his hand coaxing him into my lap. He nestled in between my legs, his had resting either side of my head.  

“I have to go,” I held him tighter for a moment before releasing him. “I’ll call you.”

“You better.”

And he did.

Almost every night for the following month. He always had a busy schedule and he needed an early night but a quick call would usually turn into a 2 hour conversation about how much time he spends in the bathroom or how much time I spend online.  

I never heard from Ezra or Juliet. Not as much as a ‘hey, I know got your hopes up but actually. You suck.’

What seemed to be a done deal was turning into a sinking dream. My jobless status landed me back in the mall, photographing kids. Yes, back in the mall, such a beautifully disgusting place. Snotty, shitting kids that would cry and scream and just give me a constant head ache. Snotty, shitty kids that coughed all over me and now I think I’m dying. I’d been here just over a week and death was very much imminent.  

My real dream was to be a freelance photographer, traveling the world taking photos that matter, not taking photos that will end up on grandma’s wall.

My other dream was also to go back to Friday night, to be back in date night in Liam’s ridiculously beautiful apartment eating Chinese, watching re-runs of old sitcoms and screwing my man on every surface in his apartment.

But, the last few days after that where quite honestly a mess. Leaving his apartment got my face all over social media, I even made headlines on the E! channel.

Imagine my surprise when I saw my face blotchy face and sex hair gracing the screen while channel surfing.

‘Mysterious burnet strikes again.’

We’d been together just over a month and already we were gracing screens and earning a ridiculous amount of attention from all walks of life

I stayed away from my usual Facebook and twitter time. Its already ended in tears twice. The fact that no one knew you, yet they were still ready to judge you was kinda heart breaking. Even my phone was mostly ignored.

It’s funny how you find out who you really are in times like these.

The fact that people treated me different because of who I’m dating was kind of ridiculous. I’m still that weird, filterless, jobless girl they knew 2 weeks ago. If I had my way. No one would know I was dating Liam. I would wear an invisible cloak, no one would have to know.

Liam was very comforting and sorry about it all. He held me close and told me that if they really knew me, they would love me. I held onto that.

I think I’m a pretty hard person to get to know. Some people just can’t handle the sassiness that comes with the Grace territiory.

 For now, I think I’ll just stick to taking photos and fucking.

That would make a great porn slogan.

The booth I was in was small so it made to germs spread further and further into my veins, seeping out my nose and just uuuugh. Don’t get me wrong. I loved kids. Kids are great, I myself was once a kid, but when they’re snotty and they’re bratty and there’s hundreds of the little mites, I just.

Can you not.

Because it was coming up to Christmas, every Mum, Dad and Sally-Jo wanted to get photos to share with their family.

“Okay, Sammy, look at the duckie,” by 2 o’clock my head was pounding and I was onto kid 401, thankfully the last before my lunch break. “Over here Sammy! Good girl!” I squeaked the duck, earning a smile from the baby. Quiet little babies that smile on demand are my favourite.

And now I sound like a paedophile.

“You’re so good with kids,” her mother gushed, I took a swig of my drink and gave her a tight lipped smile but almost spat it all over her when she asked if I had kids of my own. How old did she think I was?

“Ummm, no.” I giggled and gave her the card to collect their pictures. I stepped outside the booth and headed for the food court to take my break.

I flicked Liam a text as I walked.

‘Dinner at mine tonight?’

Dinner at my place was dinner at our safe place. Staying at Liam’s lands me on the front page of every tabloid across the country. We had to get crafty with how we snuck around, the paparazzi wanted to know everything, so did his fans.

Whose genius idea was it to date a superstar?

Like any superstar but this one, I feel my life would be a little more normal.

Today was one of those days you yearned for that half hour break to breathe fresh air and pray. Pray that you will not catch a cold, or the measles or the chicken pox or some other horrible disease that will leave me bed ridden. Mind you, if I were sick, I wouldn’t have to work…

My phone buzzed to life with a reply from Liam.

‘Sounds perfeccccct! How’s your day goin babe? I am ready for bed and trashy movies ;)’

I grinned at my phone and type a quick reply. The ass continually degrades the movies I own telling me they’re trashy and pointless.

‘I’ll even let you chose the movie this time’

As I walked through the swarms of people on their spending sprees I realised more and more people were pointed and steering at me. I slowed down a little, looking down to make sure my fly wasn’t undone, then around me to see if I was missing something. The only thing I saw was a 40% off sale at Lush.

A dolla makes me holla!

I could hear screams coming from the other side of the mall, “She’s here!” I wasn’t totally oblivious to the fact that people were starting to follow and take picture of me. But if I’m the she, something is really wrong about this situation.

I thought they’ll only followed Liam but it turns out I’m now hot property too. The irony was not lost that I am working in a mall, a teenagers wet dream, rather than a high end photographer filled with celebrities ad humans that aren’t possessed by boy band mania and all that is unhealthy.

The crowds got bigger and by the time I reached the food court, the grabbing began. Followed by the questions, then the dizzy spells and shakey hands.

Please do not pass out. Now is not the time to do this.

“Are you Liam’s girlfriend?” A teenage girl ran up beside me with tears in her eyes. Is that what this is about? Do people actually care about us? What even is us?

I just wanted some fresh air and food and peace. Teenagers were worse than children. I can’t say I love teenagers like I love children. I like me some cute kids that laugh at your dumb jokes and smile on demand. I don’t like me some chat back teens that are complete snobs and rude and hormonal.

Ugh. Teenagers.

“I’m sorry?” more girls gather and I was at the point of being backed up against the wall. It was a wall of white noise coming at me again and I could feel a wave come over me. This was it. I was going to pass out soon and these girls will eat me alive.

I ordered a take away sandwich unsure of what to do. The guy behind the counter just looked at me in shock, I’m not sure if it was because of my following or the fact he was serving I, the mysterious brunette.

I could be Mrs. Jesus for all he knew.

These are my disciples, you are the chosen one.

I shuffled from foot to foot, keeping my body away from the crowd of girls but through the reflection in the deli glass I could see the mass growing. Everyone wanted to look at the girl ordering a smoked chicken sandwich. With cheese!

People began to push into me, gripping at my clothes and reaching around for a picture. I was scared. No, I was petrified. I closed my eyes and tried to focus on my breathing.

You are safe, you are ok, you are safe, you are ok.

A single tear slipped down my face as my legs began to give way.

You are ok, but you are defiantly not safe. I felt my phone buzzing in my pocket but it was too late.

I feel against the deli glass feeling the blackness wash over me. As I hit the ground they never relented.

Teenagers suck.




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