Losing Myself For You

Grace is a 19 year old girl just trying to pay the bills of her new apartment in Doncaster, England. She decides to go into the tutoring program for younger kids at the local high school, but when she meets Lottie's older brother one day will it strike up some romance? Or maybe conflict? And will she still be able to focus on her job and career with the new distractions?


73. I'm Here For You

Grace's P.O.V.

" I know babe, I promise right after my interview I will go check on her and I will FaceTime you so you can see her. I know she misses you, but you have to stay home and rest! Lottie will keep fighting whether your there or not, and the doctor told you strictly to stay in bed," there was a slight pause," I have to go babe, they want us on set. I love you! Say hi to the babies for me."

" I love you too."

He hung up and I was once again thrown into the silence of my bedroom, aside from Chatty Man, which is what I was watching since Lou would be on. 

Lottie had been moved to the hospital full time two months ago. The treatments she was exposed to were too many to count on two hands, and she seemed to only be getting worse. It was two weeks ago they told her she wouldn't have more than a year left. Johanna was a wreck for days. All she kept saying to Lou and I was," Why couldn't it have been me? Why does he choose her to take so young!"

I was a wreck as well, but I had Louis to comfort me, Johanna only had Louis and I if we were around. I tried to visit Lottie as much as I could, but the pregnancy hadn't gone according to plans either. When I was five months they figured out I have one breech baby, and the other was crushing it. It was almost fatal for our little.... OH! I almost said the gender!

Right now I am on strict bed rest, as too much movement could change the position back to breech. 

I watched as Louis and the rest of the boys did their interview. The usual came up: Liam on how his relationship with Danielle (yes they are back together) is going, Niall and Harry updating him on their search for love, Zayn talked briefly about his relationship with Perrie, and Louis talked about the babies and I. Alan also focused on how Louis was going to make their upcoming tour work, and quite honestly I was curious for that answer as well. 

I wanted to go on tour with him, but raising two babies on a tour bus constantly moving on buses and planes, as well as being in and out of hotels made me tired just thinking about it. But at the same time I didn't want to part from Lou for 6 months and I knew he wouldn't want that either and he would love to see his little (still not saying the gender) grow up.

The interview ended and I immediately reached for my phone.

1 missed call from Johanna, 4 missed calls from Maddison, 2 missed calls from Lottie.

I didn't even think i automatically hit Lottie's contact.

it rang once and then she picked up," Hello?"

her voice was so hoarse, and so sad," Hey, you called?" I tried using the sweetest and most comforting voice I could, but I failed tearing up in the middle.

" Do you know if Lou is coming? I haven't seen you in...." she started heavily breathing and I panicked.

" Lot please don't talk just breathe. Lou just finished his interview ok? He's on his way and I will FaceTime you when he gets there. I love you! Stay strong." I hung up and burst into tears. Lottie never deserved anything like this to happen to her. She was 16 and should be in high school. God couldn't take her. If he took her, I wondered how easy it would be for him to take one of my children away.


Harry's P.O.V.

I drove home and waited for her to come. We had been doing this for eight months now without being caught by the paparazzi once and every time just got better and better.

My phone buzzed on my thigh and I picked it up," Be up soon handsome ;) Be ready for another night of fun"

I got excited just looking at the text, she was so into me, but she would never admit it. We were still "friends with benefits" and no matter how hard I tried I could never get her to fully commit to a serious relationship. She didn't want that, and I didn't want to break my heart anymore asking her. 

I loved her, yes, but if this was the only way to be with her, I'd take that over nothing. 

There was a knock on the door, and i smiled.

Let the fun begin.


" Round two?" she asked. 

I smiled and looked at her from my position on the bed. Any other guy would say yes, but I just wanted to hold her.

She was beautiful, more beautiful then she would ever accept.

" How about instead we lay here and watch a film?"

She laughed," Little tired tonight Styles?"

She got off the bed and made her way to retrieve her clothes, and I would assume to take a shower.

" Actually, Ive never been more awake."

She sighed," Well then what's stopping you?"

I shook my head as she shut the door to the bathroom, and the shower started," Love," I said, knowing she would never accept me. She would never let me in, but I would never stop trying.



Louis's P.O.V.

" Hey, Im here Lot. How are you?"

I just reached the hospital a half hour after my interview. Niall had come along as well and my mum, David, and a couple nurses were in the room as well. 

I shook David's hand and sat down next to him. I had an extreme amount of respect for him because he promised himself to my sister even though he knew her time was limited. 

Dont say that Louis, I reminded myself. I prayed for a miracle every night. I prayed that she would be cured and go back to living as her happy and sometimes sarcastic self. 

" Im ok now, I had some trouble a while ago. I was on the phone with Grace. She said you were going to FaceTime her?"

" Oh right Ill do that now."

My mum was whispering with the nurses and then gave us the signal she was going to continue the conversation out in the hall, leaving Niall, David, and I to talk with Lottie.

Grace answered on the first ring and i saw she was sitting in bed, obeying the doctors orders," Hey babe, Lottie wants to talk to you."

I handed her the phone and Lottie's face lit up. Oh if Grace were here... I prayed for the next month to go by quickly so that I could not only see my two little (gender again sorry), but also so Grace could come and be with Lottie. 

They talked until my phone died, and Niall offered for her to use his but she declined saying that Grace needed her sleep, and also because she was tired.

I gave her a hug and a kiss on the forehead," Goodnight Lot, I love you."

" Louis?"


" Did you pick out the ring yet?"

I smiled," Yes I did. I got the one you thought she would like."

she smiled," Good. Thanks. Goodnight."

" Goodnight Lot. Keep fighting."

i turned to David," Do you need a ride home?"

He shook his head," Im not leaving her," he whispered. Lottie was already asleep.

I nodded," I couldn't ask for a better man for my sister. Thank you."

He nodded and I left. I was sad to leave Lottie, but I also had to get home to the other person I worried about.

Grace was eight months pregnant, and it was during this time I needed to be with her the most for support.



Author's Note

Hey guys, I NEED COMMENTS! Seriously that last chapter, I know it was a filler but 3 comments?! That won't cut it for the next chapter (which I am currently writing). I write two chapters at a time, but I'm not gonna post it until I see some serious commenting. Sorry if you think I'm being rude but I can't type very often because of something with my hands ( I play basketball if that gives you a clue) so thats why im not updating as much anymore. U can;t even use my phone. But please comment! I WANT your feedback soooooooooooo much! Also, I have an idea for a fanfic about a girl who has hidden herself in MSG for 6 years, and no one has found her, until 1D goes to play there. What do you think? YEs? no? Want your name to be the main characters name? Want to help with the plot? well theres only one thing u can do..... COMMENT!

haha thanks again for reading!

Shannon <3

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