Love

I am a directioner. A simple normal plain directioner. Or was. I was one of the millions of their fans who lived in a very small city which meant no meeting them for me. Or so I thought. I never expected this. Never. For my dreams to come true. To hurt someone I love while they did. Now I scream when am alone because I don't know what to do. I don't know how to fix this heart I've managed to break. This is my story. The story of how I came much more than a directioner.

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8. Wanted love.

I let myself fall

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I wake up with Zayn still around me. A pang of guilt hits me like a brick as I recall last night. Imagines run through my mind at 100 miles per hour.

Niall.

Niall's eyes.

Niall's hair.

I love Zayn.

I slip out of Zayn's grasp. "Where are you going love?" "Just the washroom" I whispered and kiss his lips softly.

I love Zayn.

I go out into the hall wearing nothing but Zayn's oversized t-shirt and my underwear. As I close the door behind me the neighbor door opens. Niall steps out in nothing but his boxers. I almost pass out.

I love Zayn.

"You alright?" Niall says obviously noticing my faint like symptoms. I feel like such an idiot. "Yea!" I say "just fi-!" On my way out of the conversation I slip on the hardwood floor. Instead of crashing to the ground I feel a solid pair of strong arms under me. I look up into Niall's beautiful eyes and forget to stand up. "You sure?" he says seductively. He helps me to my feet his hand still on my arms- "What's going on?" Niall and I push each other apart and I walk over to Zayn who doesn't look like he suspected anything just concerned that I may have gotten hurt. "Nothing! I fell but Niall....... Niall......" why can't I finish the sentence?

I love Zayn.

"I caught her" Niall finishes. Even when he says it it sounds to forced.

Niall caught me.

I fell for Niall.

I love Zayn.

"oh. Glad youre alright babe." he puts his arm around my shoulders. I look at Niall his eyes are not there peaceful beautiful selves but a mix of jealously, hurt, and anger. We stare at each other as Zayn talks. "I was thinking since Niall knows so much about canoeing he could teach you today. You know you two could go out in the water together. Wouldn't that be fun?" Guilt is here again. Niall immediately says "Yea! Sounds like fun!"

I love Zayn.

......... I think.

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Niall and I stand out on the dock. He looks so attractive in his tight white t-shirt and black cargo shorts.

I love Zayn.

I don't know why I spent so much time planning my outfit today. I ended up with a tight pink v-neck and short jean shorts. I thought it was subtle but flirtatious at the same time.

I love Zayn.

"Alright. Well the first step is to actually get into the canoe." the sound of his voice sends a shutter through me. His sexy Irish accent.......

I love Zayn.

"Ok. Which leg goes first?" I say. "It.........doesn't matter." he says questioningly. "Alright." I put my left foot in the canoe. When I lift my right one I start to slip...... I let out a squeak. "Steady." Niall places his hands on my hips and he's do close my back is against his chest. His hands stay planted there for a long time and a rush of heat surges through me.

I love Zayn.

I carefully put my right foot in and try to take his hands of me. No matter how much I want them to stay there.

I love Zayn.

"I'm okay now you can let go." he keeps them there for a moment then slowly takes them back. He easily gets in the canoe and we start paddling

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We're far out in the water when Niall stops paddling. The canoe slowly drifts in the same area. ".........why... Why'd you stop?" I ask. "Because we need to talk." he says in his sexy Irish accent. "About what?" I say though I know the answer. "Don't play it Izzy. You know there's something between us. A spark. And I know your with Zayn but-" "But what?" I ask eager to find his answer. "-but I think I'm in love with you." he leans over close to my face. And even though I know what's coming I know it's wrong I let him. His lips touch mine and theres such energy it's electric. My heart beat quickens. My palms get sweaty. He's up against me now my chest on his chest. My arms around his neck. His hands on my waist. We sit there for minutes kissing a kiss that is so wrong. But this kiss is absolutely ignited. This kiss is everything it wasn't with Zayn.

I love......I love.....

Reluctantly he pulls back and looks deep into me.

And that's when I fall out of the canoe.

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